Sympathy for the Devil
by Bulmaveg-Otaku
Summary: "Leng laughed resentfully. 'That will hardly convince me. From what I can tell you seem to be getting quite a kick out of this. Your file never mentioned you had a penchant for the sadistic.' He watched as Shepard's lip tried to slide into a sneer. 'I usually don't, but for you, I'll make an exception.'" Cannon till Sanctuary then goes AU - FSheng with hints of FShenko and FShrios
1. Prologue

Sympathy for the Devil

By Bulmaveg Otaku

**AN: Okay, so I know most of you hate Kai Leng, as I did the first few times I played through Mass Effect 3, but sometimes you get bitten by the idea bug and it won't leave you alone. I know most people feel he was a poorly executed "Mary Sue" character that Bioware used as a fill in bad guy, but isn't that what fan fiction is all about? Here's my attempt at making Kai Leng a more interesting character, (ie fulfill his incredible potential)**

**UPDATE:7\21\13 I've done some editing during my long Hiatus, so there are a few minor changes that have been made. Mostly grammatical and such.**

**Disclaimer: Mass Effect and all its related characters are owned by Bioware, not me, and this isn't for profit, so there.**

Prologue: Thessia 2186 CE

The blood pounded in Commander Shepard's ears, turning every labored breath into a cacophony of rushing wind. The air around her still spun with dust from the half collapsed Asari temple, coating her armor, face, and the giant, jagged slap of flooring that she was desperately clinging to. Her shoulder joints felt taut and stretched all at once, but, so far, adrenaline seemed to be keeping the pain at bay. With one more harsh breath she blinked her vision clear and began to haul herself up, in slow clambering steps and jerking leaps. Her legs burned from hip to toe with the exertion of lifting her up the broken edge of her dangling ladder. Her arms began to tremble perceptively as she neared the top. She said a silent prayer of thanks for her gauntlets, without which her fingers would have been shredded and bleeding, making such a difficult ascent impossible.

Her line of sight rose above the hole in the floor and she registered motion off to her right as she planted her forearms and began dragging her legs over the lip of the crevice. Kai Leng was moving back towards the entrance to the temple. He was going to get away! Rage flooded Shepard's chest, burning low and hot.

In that moment of flickering distraction, Shepard's knee connected sharply with the mostly severed joint of floor pieces, shifting the angle of the block enough to complete its separation from the horizontal slab still in place. Half a heartbeat later she was dropping back, her gauntlet saving her again as her right hand clamped down on the edge, jolting her shoulder and elbow and wrist painfully, but preventing her from tumbling in to the depths below. She could hear the clatter and crash of rubble shattering beneath her over the still loud whoosh of each strained gasp for air.

Instinctively, she blocked out all superfluous stimuli as she focused on one thing, her grip encircling the very rim of solid floor. With a grunt, she flexed every muscle fiber in her arm and focused on keeping her fingers clamped down. It was no use. The tips of her fingers began to creep inevitably closer to the termination point.

"Shepard!" Liara gasped as she reached over the edge and quickly grasped her Commanding Officer and friend by the arms. "Hang on!" With the Asari's help, the Commander was pulled swiftly up to safety. Waiting not a moment, she charged to her feet and dashed after Leng, pausing only to bend and scoop up Liara's fallen pistol. As the airship began pulling away she ran, firing four quick shots, knowing as the muzzle flashed, and the airship's distance increased, that it was a wasted effort. He was gone, and with him the Prothean VI, and all hope of figuring out what the Catalyst was. The fury burning in her chest flared as she scowled and clenched her jaw in frustration.

Her radio crackled and a desperate, feminine voice clawed its way into her head. "…anyone on the frequency? This is Lieutenant Kurin, My squad is trapped!"

The N7 marine's hand flew to her ear, pressing the transmitter in her ear piece. "This is Shepard! Give us your location."

"I repeat: Is anyone on the frequency!" The strain in the Lieutenant's voice loud and clear as she continued to reach out.

Shepard tired again. "We read you! Give me your—" but she was cut off by another voice.

"The lieutenant's down! Our whole zone is collapsing! What happened to Shepard? Did they make it to the temple?" the voice, filled with fear reached into Shepard's soul and raked it's icy fingers across her guilt. "I saw them—Wait, I've got a Reaper inbound!" Panic cracked the voice as it faded into screams. "Please! Is anybody there? I—Oh, goddess. No!"

Her eyes drawn to the horizon, Shepard could do nothing as horrific shapes descended from above and began decimating the Asari forces below. The rage in her chest shattered into a thousand splintering shards of helplessness and defeat.

When Liara reached out and placed a hand on her shoulder, Shepard shrugged it off. She didn't want comfort, she didn't deserve it. She had failed, bested by the Cerberus stooge that had killed Kirrahe. It was almost more then she could stand. She turned and walked past Liara and headed back inside. Maybe there was something left behind. Maybe that Cerberus prick had missed something. Maybe… but she already knew the beacon had been wiped clean. There was nothing left.


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Still don't own Mass Effect. Still don't make money on this story.**

Chapter 1

Raina Shepard, Commander of the SSV Normandy, Specter for the Council, and N7 ranked Alliance Marine stood quietly in the shadows of the Comm Room. With her back against the wall and her arms across her chest, she leaned her head against the cold metal of the inner bulkhead and refused to let the tears fall. Inside her chest a battle of emotions was tearing at her heart and making it hard to breath.

Through all her years of service in the Systems Alliance Military, she had never felt so angry, so frustrated, so utterly hopeless. Not when she lost her entire unit on Akuze where she'd had to use all her wits and skills to survive. Not when she had been forced into working for Cerberus, the organization responsible for said unit's deaths. Not when she'd had to make the call to destroy the Alpha Relay, killing hundreds of Thousands of innocent Batarians, and not even when she had faced the nearly impossible assault on the Collector Base where she lost crew and friends, including her lover Thane Krios.

None of those events, or countless others where she'd witnessed death, destruction, and injustice had made her feel as gut-wrenchingly sick in her soul as she did at that moment. Not since that day 16 years ago when she'd literally lost everything had she felt so much pain, so much despair.

They were so close! The Crucible was nearly finished. All they needed was the information about the Catalyst and what it was. She had been seconds, SECONDS, from possessing the knowledge that would allow her to complete their one and only weapon.

It was all just too much. It wasn't enough that the Reapers posed a near impossible threat, but they had to fight against Cerberus, too. She believed firmly that all races had to be united in order to triumph, but with a serious faction of humanity dogging their every step… She was only one woman. She couldn't force the galaxy to work together.

Shepard had done so much already, uniting the Krogan and Turian forces, curing the Genophage, ending the –centuries-long conflict between the Geth and Quarians, and she should have been able to beat Kai Leng, too. If only she had climbed faster!

She breathed in and out slowly through her nose, trying to wrestle her rage, her guilt, and her sorrow under control. It felt like there were red-hot bands of steal around her chest, tightening with every beat of her warring heart. As the swell up emotion rose up her gorge and tightened her throat she reached for something, anything to help give her the calm she desperately needed. She reached for Thane. The image of him sitting at his table down in life support, his eyes closed in meditation, a quiet strength permeating from every scale. She focused on the sound of his voice, the way it vibrated against her skin when he said her name, called her Siha. She imagined the way his body seemed to glide whenever he fought, weaving a dance of death for any and all who stood in his way, fluid and graceful and beautiful.

It helped. Slowly, but surely each new memory forced the overpowering emotions down, till they were a rumbling, but manageable background roar. She nearly gasped with relief as her throat relaxed and the bands around her chest faded. She took several deep breaths and forced her shoulders to relax somewhat. There was an echo of the pain sustained by her injuries from Thessia, and that she welcomed, as well.

After making their way back to the LZ, her and her team had been checked out by Dr. Chakwas. Her assortment of bruises and strained muscles where relatively minor, given the protection from her armor, but Chakwas had still applied a healthy dose of medi-gel and insisted she take it easy for 24 hours. The fact that the ships medic would certainly give her an earful if she didn't follow doctor's orders, and the fact that she had yet to file her report with the council, were the only things keeping Shepard here in the Comm room instead of down in the cargo bay taking her now repressed emotions out on Lt. Vega. Her hands started itching to punch something and her fists were slowly clenching and relaxing.

Shepard took a step away from the back wall and leaned her arm against one of the curving support beams, her head resting on her forearm.

She focused on her anger. Anger she could handle. Over the last year or so anger had become her increasingly familiar companion. She had always prided herself on her level head and ability to stay optimistic even during the hardest missions. Since she'd been brought back from the dead, however, the constant pressure of everything with Cerberus and the Collectors, the imminent threat of the Reapers and the attack on Earth had started grinding away at her composure. With each new shock, whether it was the death of a friend or the loss of millions was starting to wear her down. It was time she stop letting the weight drag her down.

She needed to be faster, smarter, and stronger. She knew what it took to take adversity and turn it into strength. She would take this anger and turn it into a weapon. A weapon she was going to take and shove up Cerberus'…

She glanced up from where she was leaning and noticed the incoming transmission alert flashing and beeping. The Commander wondered briefly how long that had been going on. Her anger drained away as anxiety and guilt moved to the forefront of her emotions. Moving slowly, purposefully she stepped towards the QEC. Hitting the accept command she centered herself, leaning on the panel in front of her for support.

After a moment the Asari Councilor's image appeared before her. "Commander Shepard, are you there? Commander?"

Shepard couldn't seem to look the beautiful alien in the face. She felt a bit of that despair come trickling back in as she struggled to find the words. "Councilor, the mission…"

The Councilor cut her off, words terse, demanding answers. "Contact with Thessia has been cut off. When will the Crucible be ready to use?"

Raina stumbled forward. "Councilor… I wish the news was better. We didn't get the information." She dragged the words out with a visible grimace.

"Why not?" was all the Asari could say in response.

A flash of white-hot anger rippled over her tongue as she spoke her next words. "Cerberus was there." Commander Shepard forced measured calm into her voice. "We were…We were defeated. We don't know how to finish the crucible."

The Asari's distress was evident as she folded one arm across her stomach. "I… don't know what to say. What was the situation on Thessia?"

"Deteriorating fast. The Reapers are there in strength."

"Then I should be going. Plans… must be put in motion… continuity of civilization has to be considered…" Shepard was surprised by the woman's calm. "I never imagined this day would come."

"None of us did. I'm…" When she looked up finally the image in the QEC was a dissolving display of chaos. "Sorry." She whispered to the now empty room. Part of her wanted to scream at the Asari, yelling that it was all her own fault. If they'd just told them about the hidden Prothean beacon sooner, if they'd been more concerned with co-operating then keeping their damned secrets this never would have happened. She'd never been one to point her finger and ignore her own faults, however, and she wasn't going to start now. She recognized that the fault was hers and hers alone. If she'd just been faster, more accurate with her shots maybe she could have taken down Leng, instead of scrambling to stay on her feet. It was her own weakness to blame for not being strong enough to stop the Cerberus operative from keeping her from fulfilling her mission. It was not something she planned on letting happen, ever again. She straightened her spine and wiped all trace of emotion from her face before she turned and went to face her people.

* * *

Shepard had good people. Not just good, the best. Thanks to Traynor and the rest of the Normandy crew, they already had a lead to follow. Out of the darkness of failure and despair, they had found one small beam of light to cling to. That was why they were going to win. She had the best and the brightest the galaxy had to offer and when push came to shove she was sure they had what it would take to take back what had been lost, from Cerberus, from the Reapers, from the devil himself if he decided to get in her way.

She set her jaw in a determined line and checked the heat sinks on her Krysae Sniper Rifle. She double checked to make sure the cryo ammo mod was fitted securely, and glanced across the shuttle to give Tali a nob before slinging the sniper rifle back into its slot on her left shoulder. She hadn't taken Tali down into the field a lot, preferring to keep the tech savvy engineer on board the Normandy where her expertise would come in most handy, but this was an intel gathering mission. She needed her best computer people at hand. Shepard, herself, knew her way around most software protocols, but it wasn't her specialty. Between Tali and EDI she figured there wasn't a terminal in the galaxy that was safe from their elite hacking skills.

From the front of the shuttle Cortez called out, "ETA one minute, we are on approach." Shepard powered up her Mnemonic Visor and stepped forward, her gauntlets gripping the handholds above as she balanced against the slightest maneuvers. Tali rose and stood next to her, her voice smooth and calm. "What do we know, Shepard?"

"EDI?" Shepard said, turning to the curvy AI incarnate.

Stepping closer as well EDI began her briefing, hitting the relevant highlights of what they knew. "The Sanctuary facility was devoted to aiding refugees from Reaper-controlled systems. The facility went offline recently, and no communications have come or gone since. It is unclear why Kai Leng or Cerberus would be interested in Sanctuary."

Shepard's fist on the handhold tightened and she looked at both her companions, hoping she looked determined, not desperate. "If there's a clue to Cerberus here, we find it." She was interrupted by Cortez as he spoke up again.

"Ma'am, I'm picking up a signal from the facility. It's weak, but I'll try to boost it." Shepard stepped forward and watched the pilot's fingers fly across the controls. Then a voice cut through static as the signal began broadcasting over the speakers.

"This is Oriana Lawson. Stay away from Sanctuary. It's not what it seems! Please, you must listen to me! They're using…" static cut over the voice again. The woman's accent reminded her of Miranda. She replayed the message in her mind and felt the connections slid into place.

"Oriana? That's Miranda's sister." She felt the familiar anger creeping back up her throat at the mention of the ex-Cerberus agent's name. Miranda had come to her, asked her for help. Raina liked to think she'd turned the woman down because she had refused to give any explanation as to the reason for she needed access to Alliance resources, but deep down she knew it was because… because she was still angry. At least now she could guess at Miranda's intentions. If Miranda had managed without help from Shepard, as she imagined the genetically perfect woman was capable of, chances were good they would run into each other. "If she's here Miranda can't be far away."

"That's our link to Cerberus," EDI commented, putting the pieces together as well. Miranda had mentioned she was being hunted by Cerberus assassins. Was that why Kai Leng was here? Had the Illusive Man sent his best guy after her? It wasn't too big of a reach. If there were civilian refugees here that could complicate things. If Leng was going to attempt an assassination in a public place… well, things were bound to get messy. Best if they locate Miranda first and work on setting up a trap maybe… It galled her to think of working with Miranda again, but she tried to push her resentment of the woman away. If this was the best way to get to Leng and Cerberus then so be it. It would be worth being around the one responsible for Thane's death if it meant a shot at the Illusive Man and getting the information they needed about the Catalyst.

"Approaching the LZ," Cortez announced. He angled the shuttle down and slowed as he approached the outdoors landing area. The scene that she watched through the windows shocked Shepard, thought she supposed it shouldn't have. "Seeing some damage, Commander, but not activity," the Kodiak pilot continued as they circled the pad. Cement rubble and flaming debris was scattered haphazardly across the entire entrance area. Other than the flickering of the flames there was no movement. The place looked deserted.

The Kodiak banked slightly and Shepard felt her stomach lurch slightly as the shuttle moved in to position to drop them off.

"Cerberus does not get the drop on us this time," she vowed, mostly to herself as she readied her Particle Rifle. The door opened slowly and she surveyed the scene below quickly. There were lots of places to hide, lots of areas perfect for staging an ambush. "Stay sharp, people." She leaped to the ground and walked forward, keeping her body low and her eyes moving. She was ready for anything.

**AN: I know this story is starting slow, but we should get to the good stuff in the next chapter so hang in there! Reviews are always welcome. Let me know if you like it, or if you don't. Constructive criticism is, of course, encouraged.**


	3. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: Mass Effect belongs to Bioware. So does my soul. At least, that's how it feels some days.**

Chapter 2

"What happened here?" Tali asked, mystified at the amount of wreckage that littered the large glass and cement entrance lobby of the facility. Her breathing had returned steadily to normal after their brief firefight outside. Shepard had to admit, the feisty quarian was nearly as formidable on the battle field as she was down in engineering.

Shepard stepped back from a collapsed stairway and started moving to her left looking for another way down. "I don't know. Come on," she said, leading them past exposed wires that still sparked with power.

Overhead a soft feminine voice continued to announce the welcome message, and warning about communication devices not working in Sanctuary. Motion above them, drew Shepard's attention to several shuttles attempting take off.

"More Cerberus, came from that tower!" Tali shouted.

Frustration spiked as she realized she would not be able to radio the shuttle to take out the fleeing vessels. "EDI!?" the Commander whipped around. "Are you still in contact with the Normandy?" It was probably a lost cause…

"Yes, Commander," she nodded succinctly. "I had to modify my connection algorithm to compensate for the signal scrambler in order to maintain my neural link with the AI processors aboard the Normandy."

"Relay a message to Joker for me. I need him to radio Cortez, have the two of them disable any shuttles that try and leave. If there's any chance Kai Leng is on one of those Cerberus vessels, I don't want him getting away a third time." With any luck they could catch up to him and take back the prothean VI. She said a silent prayer to the powers that be as she pushed forward.

"Let's head for that tower. If Kai Leng is still here that's probably where he'll be." She signaled Tali and EDI forward with a precise wave of her hand and they began moving through the compound. Further in, they found a reception area and a partitioned area with, what appeared to be offices for processing refugees. They breezed through quickly searching for clues of Cerberus, or Oriana Lawson, but found nothing pertaining to either of their goals. Around the back they found an intact set of stairs leading down and took them, moving swiftly and efficiently.

They found the unloading area for refugees. There were a couple of crashed shuttles with corpses strewn about. Commander Shepard had to work at keeping herself objective as she eyed the dead refugees. They were mostly women and children; it seemed, with the occasional father, or adolescent son thrown into the mix for good measure. She turned away as quickly as caution allowed, assuring there were no hidden threats among the wreckage.

"Something up ahead, Shepard," Tali warned as they stepped into an observation area. There she quickly spotted the half splattered corpse of a Ravanger and several felled Cerberus soldiers.

"Casualties, both sides," she remarked, her eyes flying around the carcass covered floor, assessing each in turn to make sure they were truly dead. As she moved forward past a large support structure she spotted half a dozen troopers huddled around another reception area. She moved on pure instinct ducking quickly and quietly behind the angled supports, her finger went to her lips as she motioned Tali and EDI to wait for her signal. From the lack of shouting and gunfire, they didn't appear to have been spotted, yet. She gave her companions the signal to hold position as she moved down to the other end of the support pillars, and up a small set of stairs. She took a swift peak to see another trooper and a heavily armored Centurion at this end. It was nothing they couldn't handle. Giving a silent countdown on her fingers she signaled three, two, one, attack. Tali's shotgun roared as she leaped around her side of the room and took out the closest target before activating her drone and aiming at another trooper. EDI knelt just around the corner and started picking off her own share of the enemy. She sent an incinerating blast in the central group, weakening their shields.

Shepard raised her Particle riffle and opened fire on the shocked targets down at her end. The blue green fire shot across the Cerberus soldiers, right to left, before she focused on the one closest to her. In a manner of seconds, before the guy could even raise his own weapon, the accelerated particle burst was eating way at his shields, then his armor, and then the flesh underneath. She ignored the scream as the man disintegrated into a flurry of melting pieces. By the time he was gone, the last of his molecules vanishing in a blue green flash the Centurion had raised his rifle and started unloading slugs at her.

Her shields took three hits before she released the trigger on her rifle and dove back behind the cement barrier, taking cover as she waited for her weapon to recharge. From the sound of boots coming closer from around the corner she knew she didn't have time. "Ballsy little prick," she whispered to herself as she activated her tactical cloak.

She vanished just in time as the Cerberus commando barreled around the support beam and raised his assault rifle. He floundered for a fraction of a second as he looked for her, his eyes passing right through her. Then he saw Tali at the other end and took aim at her.

Shepard stood silently, still cloaked, as she stepped inside his shields. "No, you don't," She grunted as the butt of her rifle swung forward revealing her an instant before she shattered the faceplate of his helmet and busted his nose. He stumbled back, surprised, and she engaged her omni blade, sliding it in between the plates of his armor and into his side. He sputtered with shock evident on his face as he began coughing up blood. As he collapsed backwards, Shepard jerked out her blade, spinning to find her next target. There were none.

With adrenaline singing in her veins, her muscles tingled pleasantly from the cybernetic implants that gave her superhuman strength. Shepard walked over towards the area where the troopers had been gathered before the attack. Again, she checked to make sure all the bodies on the floor where indeed dead as she searched for anything helpful. She spotted a rather high quality looking pistol scope on one of the dead men's weapons and scooped to retrieve it. She knew Liara was trying to increase her marksmanship to supplement her biotic prowess. It would make a nice gift for the Shadow Broker.

Shepard smirked slightly and gave Tali and EDI the all clear.

"This is an observation deck," EDI observed, looking out the wall of glass at the scene outside. She stepped over a fallen enemy, and scanned the room. "Looks like a dead end."

"We need an exit," Shepard growled, her impatience spiking sharply before she suppressed it. "Keep looking," she ordered and walked around the desk. She was eyeing the surface for any open terminals for discarded data pads when she heard a voice coming from an alcove to her right. Her head snapped up and she raised her rifle. It was too quiet to discern the words, but she moved quickly around the desk and into the hallway. Against the far wall where it opened into a small utility room, she spotted a terminal broadcasting intermittent static.

"This is a Cerberus facility!" a familiar voice declared as the Commander and her companions closed in.

"Shepard!" Tali exclaimed with recognition.

"That's Miranda," Raina nodded as she lowered her rifle and approached the console. With a few key strokes she had the signal cleaned up and coming through more clearly.

"This is Miranda Lawson. If you've managed to get this far you must be desperate or stupid. Listen to me! This is not a refugee camp. This is a Cerberus facility run by my father Henry Lawson. Turn back now. There is no help to be found here. Communication is being blocked from the central tower. Sanctuary is a lie. Stay away!" Miranda's voice was as confident and forceful as ever. Her smooth accent laid out the facts in a way that made it hard for anyone to disbelieve her. It was a voice that inspired trust and confidence. It was a voice that Shepard hated.

* * *

_Collector Base, 2185_

"_Joker, can you get a fix on our position?" Shepard queried after activating her ground to air frequency. _

"_Roger that, Commander. All those tubes lead into the main control room right above you," her pilot answered. "The route is blocked by a security door, but there's another chamber that runs parallel to the one your in."_

_The electronically modulated voice EDI cut into the frequency. "I cannot recommend that. Thermal emissions suggest the chamber is overrun with seeker swarms. Mordin's countermeasure cannot protect you against to many at once."_

_The Commander's mind whirled furiously for a solution. "What about biotics?" she asked after only a second. "Could we create a biotic field to keep them from getting near us?" she glanced at Miranda and Jacob, but it was Samara that answered her first. "Yes, I think it may be possible. I wouldn't be able to protect everyone, but we might be able to get a small team through if they stayed close."_

"_I could do it, too." Miranda said confidently. "Theoretically, any biotic could handle it." Raina listened with a surge of triumph and nodded acknowledgement. "Shepard, who do you want to maintain the field?" Miranda asked with the slightest weight behind her gaze as she locked eyes with Shepard. So far, the Commander had kept Miranda in support roles only, preferring to rely on her tried and true companions, the one she counted on the most, the ones that weren't Cerberus employees. It seemed like Miranda was looking for her moment to shine, and so far she had worked hard to follow Commander Shepard's orders, to the tee. Perhaps it was time to give Miranda a chance to prove herself. She sounded so positive she could do it, like it was no big deal._

"_Miranda and I will take a small team through the seeker swarms," Raina announced. She noticed the please expression that flashed across Miranda's face ever so briefly and it reassured her. There really was much to admire in the woman, once you got through her pushy, demanding, somewhat bitchy exterior. "The rest of you provide a diversion by going through the main passage. We'll open the security doors from the other side and meet you there." She eyed the group carefully. "Jacob, you'll lead the diversion team."_

_Dr. Chakwas spoke up then. "What about me and the rest of the crew, Shepard? We're in no shape to fight." The tough old bird stated the facts coolly, not a tremor in her voice. Shepard felt her heart swell with gratitude that they had been in time to save her crew before the blasted Collectors had turned them into goo. _

_Joker's voice spoke over the comms again. "Commander? We have enough systems back online to do a pickup, but we'd need to land back from your position."_

"_We can't afford to go back, Shepard. Not now." Miranda said vehemently. _

"_You'll never make it without help," Shepard admitted, eyeing the exhausted, traumatized look of some of the other crew members. "I'll send someone with you. Samara, I'll leave them to you."_

_With a nod the Asari Justicar began communicating with the Normandy to plan the crew's escape. _

"_Thane, Garrus you're with me, the rest of you with Jacob. We've all got our assignments. Let's move out." Considering the circumstances, Shepard's spirits were high. So far they'd only lost Zaeed. He'd taken a slug to the face while they were attempting to get some security doors closed. She felt a twinge of guilt over the relief she felt that it had been him that was killed. Of all her teammates, he was the one she distrusted the most. He had been a greedy, calculating prick. Not that she had wanted him to die, that wasn't it at all. It was just that if someone had to take that slug, well, she was just glad it hadn't been someone she… valued more. It was a cold way to look at it, but that was how she felt. She suppressed the guilt and nodded to Miranda as they opened the doors ahead and walked through. Around them a faint shimmer appeared in the air as Miranda raised her barrier. _

"_Let's go," she grunted, sounding only mildly strained. "Everyone stay close."_

_Things had gone according to plan, at first. Though it wasn't exactly a walk in the park, the three snipers had managed to pick off any collectors that showed their ugly mugs before they could even get close and they had progressed swiftly through the room. The sizzling sound of seekers as they hit the barrier was a thing of beauty. With half the collector forces focused on the diversion team it had been almost fun. She and Garrus had started a running total, competing for most headshots while Thane smiled his enigmatic smile and shook his head at their childishness. _

_Then, as they approached the last landing before the long sweeping ramp that lead to the exit, she had happened to glance at Miranda. The seriousness of the situation came crashing down around her ears as she noticed her hunched shoulders and heaving chest. The strain in Mirand's genetically perfect face was obvious. _

"_Come on, people!" She had shouted, anxiety crashing over her like a tidal wave. It was at that moment that the Collectors seemed to figure out their plan and sent reinforcements in droves. Shepard lost count of her kills as it suddenly became a flurry of motion around her. Aim, breathe, shoot, aim, breath, shoot, load a new thermal clip, aim, and then there was no time for breathing. The collector forces surged forward, despite taking heavy casualties from the skilled snipers, their weapons tearing at Miranda's already trembling field. _

"_Hurry!" the biotic gasped, nearly stumbling as they reached the bottom of the ramp. Garrus leaped over one of the low obstacle blocks that were everywhere around the base, as he pulled switched out his sniper rifle for his assault rifle. "Shepard, we need to get out of here," he growled as he took out another collector with two shots to the chest._

"_Alright, lets move," encouraged her team to go faster, the doors only a dozen feet away now. "Push it! Keep it up!" _

"_Hurry, Shepard," Miranda shouted, her biotic field flickering, but holding. _

"_Everyone in the doors, now!" They were so close! They were going to make it! Garrus moved inside and stepped to the door controls just as Miranda fell to her knees. _

"_Hurry, Shepard," she had gasped for the third time as she gave the field the last trickle of her dark energy. Raina rushed forward and slung one of Miranda's arms over her shoulder. Then the field dropped. _

_Things seemed to grind into slow motion as Commander Shepard's adrenaline and cybernetics kicked into overtime. She carried Miranda through the door and turned to check on Thane. He was still outside, picking off half a dozen collectors that were pressing closer._

"_No!" Shepard shouted. "Fall back!" She dropped Miranda to the floor and raised her assault rifle, trying to help, trying to give Thane the micro seconds he needed to make it through the doors. Her eyes were wide with terror as she watched Thane jerk, his hand flying up to slap his neck. Her breath caught in her chest as the air around him seemed to grow darker, as if the light around him were being dimmed slowly. _

_Then he began to seize and twist. "Thane!" she screamed and rushed forward, reaching for him. Her eyes met his for an instant and she felt her heart stop. _

_It was a moment that would haunt her for the rest of her days. The look in his eyes… she would never forget it. Most people found drell hard to read. It was true they had fewer facial muscles then humans or asari, and therefor fewer expressions, but Shepard had always been able to look into Thane's eyes and read novels. In that moment his eyes were full, full of love and sorrow for her, as she reached for him desperately, but also, they were full of resignation and peace. She felt her fingertips brush his boot. Then he was just gone. The seekers around him coalesced into a solid fist that picked him up and carried him away. He didn't even have time to say a word. Not with his voice, anyway. That voice she loved so much. He had said all he could with his eyes. Those damned eyes!_

_She only vaguely recalled feeling an arm slide around her waist and yanking her backwards, just as the doors slammed closed between them and the oncoming hoard, between her and Thane. _

* * *

Sanctuary 2186

"Shepard?" EDI's voice pulled the Commander from her memory.

"Okay," Raina said an intense frown hardening on her face. "We've got Cerberus, Reapers and Miranda's crazy father. Any ideas how this all fits?" She was met only with silence. Shepard shook her head and continued through the widening corridor until they passed outside onto a wide deck overlooking pipes and waterworks. Against the railing on the far side she found an important looking display. She holstered her rifle and starting typing away.

It seemed a simple enough program. She was through in a matter of seconds. Overhead a distant warning alarm started sounding and there was a trembling to the ground.

"What's happening?" Tali asked a nervous tick to her voice. They all walked to the edge of the platform water started draining from the closest tank.

Beneath the water there were large nodes of machine work with pipe lines leading every which way. "They needed to hide something," Shepard mused as she noticed the ladder descending the closest wall of the now drained lower level. She surveyed the walkway all the way over to the far wall and noticed a pair of sealed doors. "We have a backdoor into the facility. Let's move." She stepped over the edge and descended the ladder. She heard EDI and Tali drop down behind her and pulled out her rifle again.

Behind her she heard Tali gasp slightly. "Some of this is Reaper tech, Shepard. I'm sure of it. Cerberus has found a way to interface between our technology and the Reapers'." The prospect was daunting. It also explained a lot about the new technology Cerberus was sporting, and their new and improved soldiers. It also explained how they were managing to indoctrinate their newest recruits. "And the Lawson's are caught in the middle," she muttered, feeling her anxiety peek. "Let's pick up the pace," she ordered as she opened the door and walk through.

They managed to move quickly, covering an impressive amount of ground in a short period of time. The underground corridors and labs had a definitely ominous feeling. The emergency backup lighting left the passageways and rooms filled with dark, intense shadows that had Shepard and her crew on their toes.

Through the darkness she heard Tali whispering over the coms. "Cerberus… and Reaper technology. This is going to be bad, isn't it?"

Tali was so right about that.

They located the main command center, a large room with terminals along every wall and a large, central security desk. The wall to the left overlooked a large space that faded way into heavy, impenetrable darkness. After they located and reactivated the power supply, all of the overhead monitors came blinking to life, revealing all the ugly truth about Sanctuary. Commander Shepard watched in growing horror as innumerable refugees were turned into husks. This was more then she had thought the Illusive Man capable of. She understood his desire for humanity to rise above and beyond the restrictions of the council. She even understood his distrust of the other races, though she didn't agree with his conclusions or his methods she always seen a certain method to his madness. But this… this was inexcusable. He was somehow involved in luring in innocent refugees and using them in deeply disturbing, horrific experiments. It was monstrous…

With an impending sense of dread she walked around the console and moved to a forward terminal where she activated the lights in the adjoining chamber. It took several seconds for the lights to come on, lighting in stages progressing deeper and deeper into the facility. She was not surprised to find the enormous chamber filled with husks, wandering free and reacting violently to the light as they scattered like cockroaches. Not surprised at all, but that didn't stop her stomach from lurching at the sight, or from her pulse accelerating. She stepped back with a gasp when a hissing, twitching husk leaped onto the window in front of her, climbing slowly up the outside of the glass.

She felt all her rage and frustration boiling to the surface as she stood, frozen, examining the scene. This was supposed to be a simple recon and intel gathering mission, maybe a snatch and grab, if they could get their hands on Kai Leng and the Prothean VI. She didn't feel even remotely prepared for this.

Being the illustrious Commander Shepard, however, meant she was used to improvising. She forced down her emotions and locked them tight behind her walls. She gripped her rifle tightly and turned to EDI.

"What's the situation with the Normandy? Have the managed to bring down those evac shuttles?" she asked, her tone dark and her eyes steady.

EDI took a second before responding. "The first few managed to break atmosphere before the Normandy was in position. Between Joker and Lieutenant Cortez, they have disabled eight Cerberus shuttles and forced them to land. It seems that most of the Cerberus evacuees were either destroyed by the Reaper forces or have already evacuated."

Shepard nodded. "Tell Joker I want him to keep his eyes open and continue to bring down any fleeing shuttles. Have Cortez rendezvous with the Normandy. I want him to pick up Alenko, Vega, and Vakarian. Tell the Major I want them investigating those downed shuttle sites. Take prisoners when possible and I want Kai Leng alive, if they find him." She hesitated only briefly before adding. "Tell him to be careful. Leng is a slippery bastard."

"Understood, Commander," EDI didn't actually salute, but the intention was clear.

"Alright, come on," Raina growled as they continued through the facility.

As they entered the next room Tali's voice, once again, filled their coms. "Why create husks? They're just more troops for the Reapers. They could destroy the facility if they escaped. It seems like a stupid risk."

"The Reapers attacked because this place was a threat," Shepard had already considered the questions Tali now posed, but didn't have many answers. Yet. "We need to find out why."

They moved to the far side of the room where another security terminal was flickering eerily in the near total darkness. A haunting voice murmured through the static. Shepard managed to clear it up.

Miranda appeared, typing on a console and speaking into the recording device frantically. "Reaper forces have made a mess of the facility. I'm shutting down the power to the processing plant to lock them down. It should keep them out of the entrance as well."

The screen changed camera shots; Shepard assumed it was an automated system that was responded to motion detectors. Kai Leng moved into view, his cybernetics-enhanced swagger all too familiar by now.

"She won't know he's here," Tali muttered, anxiety apparent in her tone.

On screen Leng activated a com device. He obviously didn't have any problem with the scramblers… Shepard only remotely listened to his voice as she checked for a time stamp on the security footage. It was from an hour earlier. It was good odds then that he was still here, somewhere.

"Let's go," she said through clenched teeth. This time, Leng was going down.

**AN: Okay, so this chapter just kind of blew up in my face. I wanted to get to the confrontation with Kai Leng already, but I suddenly looked down and realized I was at 4000 some odd words, so in the interest of my goal to get a chapter up every weekend I'm posting this one now and I'll be getting to the good stuff next time. I know, I know, I said that last time, but this time I mean it. For reals. ;) As always, please review! I'm always excited to hear opinions, concrit, and even suggestions for what you'd like to see in this story. I have a pretty solid base line for the plot, but I'm always looking for good stuff to fill out the background. I hope you all have enjoyed it so far. If you see any glaring grammar or spelling errors, let me know about those, too. I'm too excited about getting this story out to have time to have it beta'd. Till next week!**


	4. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Oh, Bioware, how I love thee, let me count the ways… in the meantime Mass Effect is still thine. Not mine.**

Chapter 3

"Let's move it, Lieutenant," Major Kaidan Alenko ordered as he locked his helmet into place. The Normandy cargo bay was open. The UT-47A Kodiak was just raising its side door. Garrus was through the opening before the hydraulics had completed their full range of motion. Vega, however was still standing next to the weapon bench, tightening the final screw on the magazine upgrade for his M-99 Saber.

He'd been in the process of equipping his assault rifle with the recently acquired high capacity mag when the call came in for them to suit up. He'd left his weapon on the table while he donned his body armor and was now rushing through the final check to make sure it was combat ready.

In just a handful of seconds he had it locked down and slung on his back as he dashed across the cargo bay to the waiting shuttle, and the waiting Major. From the look on Alenko's face it was obvious he'd taken a double handful of seconds longer then was acceptable.

James repressed an urge to flash a highly insubordinate grin at the ranking officer and blow him a kiss. He also kept the comment about twisted pantyhose locked down behind his clenched teeth. If it had been Shepard it would have been a different story. The lieutenant had gotten the distinct impression that the freshly minted Spector wasn't a fan of his easy-going-lack-of-professionalism, or any of his other fine personality traits, for that matter.

Upon entering the shuttle Vega took up his place, leaning against the back wall as the Major followed him in and hit the panel, shutting the door behind them.

"Cortez," Kaidan nodded as he stepped up behind the pilot seat.

"Major."

"I'm uploading the coordinates for our first target into the nav computer," Alenko stated calmly as his fingers flew over his omni-tool. The shuttle was already lifting out of the shuttle bay and moving out. Specialist Traynor had helped the Major decide the best plan of attack. The downed shuttles were spread out over an area of approximately 80 square kilometers. Moving from the farthest shuttle and spiraling in, he hoped they could monitor an effective perimeter and cut off any Cerberus troops attempting to escape on foot. Then they would also be able to rendezvous with Shepard at the Sanctuary facility.

"Heads up, Major," Cortez shouted, suddenly. "We've got another two more shuttles attempting evac. Origination point looks like to be the roof of the com tower. It looks like they've got a Harvester on their six."

"Joker, can you take those shuttles down?" Kaidan asked after thumbing on his shipboard frequency.

"That's an affirmative," Joker confirmed and Alenko and Cortez watched the Normandy as it adjusted course and headed to intercept.

"Cortez, take us down to the first site."

They approached low over the treetops towards a column of rising dark smoke. A long strip of trees was now flattened and burning along the crash trajectory of the first shuttle.

"There's nowhere to put the shuttle down, sir," Cortez called as Kaidan slapped the open panel for the door. Suddenly the inside of the Kodiak was filled with the sound of firing thrusters and crackling flames and the smell of the smoke as well as the rich sent of churned soil and verdant, growing greenery.

"Just get us as close as you can. Then stay close, standard low alt holding pattern. We'll radio for pick up." They were still well outside the localized jamming signal being broadcast from Sanctuary.

"Yes, sir."

Vega and Garrus readied their assault riffles and, after waiting for an opportune moment, James leapt, followed by the turian and then the Major with his M-77 Paladin drawn and his biotic amp buzzing with barely-suppressed dark energy. They were only twenty-five or thirty feet from the mostly intact wreckage of the Cerberus vessel.

Alenko signaled silently for all of them to fall back into the trees for cover, circling the decimated clearing. They kept to the shadows and moved efficiently, knowing that anyone who was conscious and alert would have seen the shuttle drop them off. Between the smoke, the ever-growing flames and shifting shadows from overhead foliage visibility was as poor as could be expected.

As they rounded the front of the shuttle they could see the trashed nose of the Cerberus craft, buckled and rent. The darkened glass was intact, making it difficult to assess the status of those inside. The starboard side door was actually missing, but from this angle the interior was shrouded in smoke and darkness.

Garrus eyed the forest slowly fanning his area of focus further out deeper into the still standing trees. Fire was going to become a problem soon as the flames spread from spotty areas of debris and burning shrapnel to the lush undergrowth and up the long trunks of the trees that were still standing. All the motion, not to mention the heat, was throwing off his visors auto-targeting function. This was a nightmare.

Light flashed from deep in the trees on the far side of the wreck and an instant later the closest tree on Vakarian's right exploded into flames as gunfire filled the air around him. His shields took a pair of hits before his reflexes dropped him to the ground and he rolled left, coming to rest under a rather large shrubbery of some kind.

"We've got hostiles!" Garrus shouted, sure the others already knew, but habit and instinct drew the words from his mouth. He sharpened his focus and switched out his Phaeston for his Viper, looking down the sight to where the enemy fire had originated.

The Turian felt the perfectly calm, perfectly patient, perfectly clear focus familiar to any good sniper settle over him. He waited.

To his left he heard his two human companions moving through the low brush, a mixture of slow, squat steps and quick dashing movements. Kaidan and James moved further around the curve of the crash site hoping to draw more fire and give Garrus something to aim at.

After a dozen steady breaths, he saw more muzzle flashes dancing between trees and shadows. 'Gotcha,' he sighed, exhaling as he squeezed the trigger in a smooth, fluid motion.

The enemy fire tilted up briefly ripping through the foliage above before cutting off completely. He waited two dozen breaths before turning and spotting Alenko, back against a large rock that jutted at an angle from the forest floor.

Kaidan nodded to him once and then motioned for him to stay put. Garrus watched the Major as he punched a quick command into his omni-tool. Alenko then glanced back to his sniper, pointed two fingers at his eyes, and then at Garrus, then out in direction of the shuttle and their foes.

Vakarian gave the slightest nod of understanding before his eyes focused back down his scope. He watched carefully as Major Alenko released a low powered broad spectrum overload pulse. It wouldn't do much to the enemy's shields, but it would cause them to flash visibly for the merest instant as it brushed past them. It was another tactic they commonly employed in low-vis situations like this.

He didn't see any flickers of blue. Of course, that didn't mean there wasn't anyone out there. It just meant they were either hiding outside the AOE of the pulse or they were using biotic barriers instead of battery powered mass effect shields.

Glancing back at Alenko, Vakarian gave a half shrug, half shake of his head, having picked up the non-verbal communication habits after all the time he spent working with Commander Shepard and the other human's aboard the SSV Normandy.

The crease between the Major's brows deepened, barely visible through the man's face plate, and Garrus knew he was sporting a hefty scowl. Heftier, rather. Garrus couldn't remember the last time he's seen the man smile. Not since he'd been back on the Normandy, for sure. Not since Earth had been under siege. Probably not since she had…

He brought his thoughts back into tight focus as Kaidan waved him and Vega forward. The air was now so cloying with smoke and ash that Garrus wished he was wearing a full helmet. At least it would make things just as hard for the enemy.

They moved close to the shuttle, stepping cautiously through black-charred wreckage. Vega took point, leaning his back against the bulkhead next to the opening before taking a quick look inside. Garrus kept his Viper aimed into the opening ready to take out anything that might jump out at them. Nothing did. James took a longer look, spotting a heap of armored bodies pulled near the front, up against the back of the pilot's seat.

The turian's tech knowledge let him know that Joker and Cortez had been focused on damaging the eezo core drives, making it impossible for them to maintain altitude. Any competent pilot should be able to land a shuttle like this fairly safely with maneuvering thrusters. Apparently the pilot of this shuttle had been less than competent. The shuttle had come down two hard and the passengers in back had all been mashed together like grapes in a blender.

Counting feet, Garrus estimated twelve dead assorted Cerberus personnel. If he knew his specs right, and Garrus always knew his specs right, this shuttle would top out at 14. He'd downed at least one guy who'd fired at them from the cover of the trees. That meant…

He whipped around quickly, in time to see the barest hint of movement just behind where Kaidan was crouched. He didn't even think, he just aimed and fired, though the sniper rifle was awkward at such close range. In the same breath he charged forward, rotating his claw and bringing the gun up in front of him like a shield.

Vakarian's shoulder hit Kaidan at the same instant that he saw the tactical cloak of the phantom drop, and felt the barrel of his Viper jerk as it snagged the falling blade. For a second he thought his trusted rifle would hold the attack. It didn't.

He felt the tension of the weapon between his talons give as the blade sliced through metal and he stumbled backwards. To his right and behind him he heard simultaneous shots as a now recovered Alenko and Lieutenant Vega opened fire on the attacking enemy.

The Phantom's already weakened barrier shuttered and then blinked out. Shots continued to sing all around Garrus as he took another step back, pulling out his Phaeston again. Before he could get a single shot off, however, the body of the Phantom started to dance and leap as slugs ripped through its armor and into its flesh.

By the time he had his assault rifle raised and pointed it at the Phantom it was dropping hard to the ground, its chest and head a bloody pulp of core and blood.

Kaidan, who had been firing from a sitting position only a couple of feet away, jumped to his feet. Vega stepped forward until he was even with Garrus, who's eyes flicked between the other two.

"You guys okay?" Vega asked, his eyes not leaving the downed enemy.

"Yeah," Kaidan said stepping forward to kick the sword from the Cerberus ninja's now slack grip. "Garrus?"

Garrus was still somewhat stunned, but managed to look down and assess the damage. The front of his armor had a deep slash down the left side of his chest plate. The sword had bitten through the light weight ablative coating, the kinetic padding and the fabric weave beneath. He could see through the gash down to the skin beneath. There was a neat trickle of blue running in a line beneath the gap in his armor, moving down it dripped once, twice, onto the ground. Then he moved his eyes lower. At his feet the two halves of his Viper lay where he'd dropped them earlier.

His face went slack with grief and his mandibles quivered.

"Garrus?" Kaidan turned to him, his scowl deepening farther.

"Shit, man, she got you," James let his saber swing on its chest strap and reached for some medi-gel.

The turian finally found his voice. "I'm fine, it's just a scratch," he whispered, not being able to suppress the despair from his tone.

"Yeah, right," Vega scoffed and pulled the cap from the small tube.

"Really, I'm fine," Garrus barked, his tone sharper now as he snatched the tube from James' grasp.

"Then why do you look like they just killed your first puppy," Vega asked, indignant as he watched the turian dab the gel into his scratch.

"Killed my what?" Garrus had a distinctly puzzled expression on now.

"Well," Kaidan grunted, "they sorta did…" he bent over and retrieved the two pieces of the gun. He handed them gently to Garrus as soon as he was finished and had stashed the rest of tube in one of his hard suit's storage compartments.

Vakarian held them before him with a sorrowful reverence.

The lieutenant burst into laughter.

Alenko scowled some more and shook his head. "Let's make sure that's all of them," he snapped and started walking away, back on alert.

Vega followed, still laughing.

Garrus hesitated, not wanting to leave his trusted weapon here to rot, but, not seeing a practical way to take it with them, he leaned them against the side of the shuttle wreckage. "You can be a real insensitive prick, you know that, Jimmy?" He wanted to snarl, but managed to mediate his tone down to a growl. He wasn't really angry at Vega, but he was angry. He resisted the urge to kick the Phantom's corpse as he stalked by, but only barely.

They found the other trooper out in the forest; a sniper slug had torn right through its chest. After a quick sweep they declared all hostiles neutralized and called for Cortez. Kaidan "lifted" Garrus and Vega into the open shuttle door and then they reached down and pulled him in. The flames in the clearing where spreading rapidly now.

The Major instructed Cortez to start for the next drop spot while he attempted to radio the closest settlement. His attempts to notify the local authorities about the fire hazard all failed, however. It didn't look like anyone was home.

"I wouldn't worry too much, Major," Cortez said, as he watched the other man pace in frustration. "Horizon gets quite a bit of rain. A storm should roll through here in an hour or so. They're pretty regular this time of year."

Kaidan nodded, but didn't look pleased. That was all they needed. On top of wrecked shuttles and burning forests they would have to deal with inclement weather as well. He glanced back into the main compartment of the shuttle and felt his lip twitching sardonically. At least it would be weather to suit the mood.

Poor Garrus, he thought. He knew the turian had carried that same Viper since before his Archangel days. It had been the gun that had kept him alive long enough to be rescued by Shepard back on Omega. He'd knew a thing or two about turian culture and expected that sentimental attachment to inanimate objects was probably something they frowned on, as a species. Garrus had always seemed to be more human than other turians he met, though. He was sure the guy was hurting right now.

Suddenly the shuttle was filled with static, and then a woman's voice.

"Listen to me, this is not a refugee camp, this is a Cerberus facility run by my father Henry Lawson." It was a voice that none of the humans in the shuttle recognized, but Garrus did.

Then that voice was cut off and another woman, familiar to them all cut through.

"Cortez, do you read?"

"Loud and clear, ma'am," Cortez said with a smile. The tension in the small space loosened considerably. "I've got the Major here as well."

"Shepard," Kaidan managed to sound ninety-five percent professional and only five percent relieved. "What's your location, we can rendezvous with you…"

"Listen up, Major," the Commander cut it. "I'm going to be sending you a tracking frequency. Miranda Lawson managed to get a tracking device on Kai Leng and you guys are probably closer than we are. I want you to track him down and detain him. We'll meet up with you as soon as we can."

Alenko heard his omni-tool beep with an incoming data file. He accepted the file and began linking the tracking frequency into the shuttles nav system.

"Copy that, Commander," he said briskly and then nodded to Cortez. "Looks like he was in one of those last two shuttles Joker put down. Take us in."

Kaidan walked back to stand next to Garrus. "You heard the Commander. She wants Leng alive if at all possible. We'll need him to tell us where the prothean VI is. I don't have to tell you how important it is that we get that VI, but I want you both to proceed with caution. From what intel we've gathered on Leng he's an ex-marine, N7 class, and extremely dangerous, even before he joined Cerberus. Since then he's received ample amounts of experience as one of the Illusive Man's top wet work operatives as well as cybernetic enhancement and Phantom class upgrades. Shepard would never admit it out loud, but I know this guy makes her nervous, and that's saying something."

Vega nodded his face serious. "I was there on Thessia when he stole the data. He's one tough son of a bitch, and he likes to play dirty. If he hadn't had that gunship backing him, we'd have taken him." James sounded his usually confident self.

"Well that maybe true, and it looks like we've taken him by surprise here on Horizon, but I don't want anyone getting cocky. We'll have him cornered and we want to take him alive. That means he's still going to have an advantage over us."

Garrus tightened his grip on his Phaeston. "Yeah, he isn't going to have to hold back."

Both James and Kaidan glanced at Garrus then. They were taken aback by the dark intent radiating from his face.

"Right," Alenko nodded, swallowing hard and trying not to let his concern show. He knew the turian was upset. He also knew that Garrus could handle himself. He had faith in his ability to operate professionally, even under these… emotionally charged circumstances. They all wanted this win. Not just for the war effort, or for the team, but for Shepard. She needed this. Badly.

Moving back up to the front, Alenko monitored their approach on the radar. They were only 3 klicks from the blinking dot and moving fast.

"Put us down about five hundred meters out. I don't want him to see us coming if we can help it."

"Yes, sir," Cortez nodded and worked the controls, taking them in. He managed to find a land access road that connected Sanctuary to one of the established settlements here on the colony world. He set the shuttle down with practiced ease and the other three stepped out.

Kaidan had his omni-tool up and used it to orient them in the right direction. "This way," he muttered and took the lead. They spread out and moved through the trees in almost complete silence. It seemed Vega was determined to find every small stick and branch in his path and snap in under his massive boots.

"You want to at least try to move quietly," Garrus growled into his com link.

"Now you know why I never even attempted infiltration training. I'm a tank, man, what can I say?" Vega chuckled.

"Cut the chatter," Alenko snapped.

James ground his teeth and together and shrugged off the reprimand. He did start paying more attention to where he stepped, though.

Three hundred and seventy meters in Kaidan stiffened stopped walking. On his omni-tool had been showing a stationary blip that was now just over 100 meters due north of their current position. Now, however, it showed the blip moving away and to the west, and moving fast.

"Let's move!" Kaidan yelled and started moving at a run, angling their trajectory into an intercept course.

The moved quickly, each doing their part to keep an eye on their assigned quadrants, ready in an instant to call out a warning if they spotted anything. Major Alenko was in front, watching all the area straight ahead. Vakarian was on the right flank, Vega on the left. Each new what was expected on them, and covered their duties with professional expertise that was rivaled by very few in all the know galaxy. They leapt over fallen branches, stumps and brush, pushing through the wild terrain with as much speed as caution would allow. As such it took them less than a minute to catch up with the blip on the Major's omni-tool.

The slowed as they approached, which saved their lives.

They broke through the tree line and found themselves standing on top of a large rocky outcropping. Skidding to a halt, Kaidan put his arms out to stop James and Garrus from going over. Below them in a large gully filled with rocks and assorted organic detritus a Harvester stood, it's cannons firing at a large boulder below them and to the left about 25 feet from where they were.

Simultaneously, they dropped to their stomachs and crawled to the edge. Alenko studied the situation quickly and then began dishing out orders with rapid-fire efficiency.

"Garrus, I want you set up here. I know you only have your assault rifle, but we're close enough, you can make it work. On my mark we're going to take out that Harvester. Vega, I want you to find a way down into that slope. You'll circle around behind our target. It looks like he's hiding behind that boulder for now. Be ready to take him down if he tries to flee. Remember, he's equipped with serious biotic shielding and a monomolecular blade."

"Not to mention that delightful semi-auto hand cannon," Garrus grumbled, sighting down his Phaeston at the massive Reaper dragon.

"Where you gonna be, Major," Vega asked, shouldering his Saber and pulling out his M-27 Scimitar.

"Don't worry about me, I'm going to be helping with that Harvester," Kaidan looked determined and far away as he rose to a crouch. "Vega," he said at the last second, eyeing the Lieutenant's powerful shotgun. "Remember, we want him alive."

"Hey, no worries, Major. I'll be aiming for his legs," He gave a cheeky wink and then moved off into the trees along the ridge to their west.

Alenko shook his head and moved in the opposite direction. He followed the edge of the gully until he found a place where the slope was gentle enough for him to descended safety. He was now well behind the Harvester and started moving back, approaching it from the rear. He had holstered his Paladin and had his Mattock at the ready, found cover as close to the thing's tail end as he dared get, and radioed Vega.

"You in position, LT?" Kaidan whispered.

Vega's response was drowned out as the Harvester let out a deafening roar and launched a cannibal laden fireball.

"Repeat that," Kaidan said as soon as his ears had cleared.

"I've got eyes on the Tango, but we've got company, Major."

"That's affirmative. Lay low for now, let Leng deal with those Cannibals for now, step in only if his life is in danger. Garrus, you ready?"

"Yes, sir."

"Then let's do this!" Kaidan leaned out from behind his rock and opened fire on the Harvester. From the top of the ridge, Garrus did the same, aiming for the things face, grinning devilishly as his armor piercing rounds did their thing.

The Harvester let out another ear shattering roar and lurched away from Garrus's shots. It slammed sideways against the opposite wall and crushed anything in its way.

Noticing most of its weight leaned on its right hind leg he lashed out with a powerful biotic blast that staggered it farther. It writhed in fury as bouts of organic and synthetic fluid began spouting from a myriad of holes along the left side of its neck and head, and its legs gave out, dropping it to its belly with a ground shaking crash. Kaidan stumbled forward, moving out of cover and along the south wall.

Aiming his omni-tool carefully, Kaidan launched a cryo-blast into the things side. Ice shattered and spread along the things gory flank, flash-freezing into its wounds and penetrating the cold deep into its muscles. As the effect spread, creeping up the things wings and neck it stilled and collapsed onto the ground, dead.

Kaidan only had a second to feel the triumph that flooded his veins before a shower of slugs pelted across his shields. He raised his barrier in an instinctual reflex and dove behind the nearest cover. The walls of the gully echoed with a barrage of sounds, gunfire and cannibal growls and tumbling rocks. Waiting for a lull, he rolled onto his belly and aimed around his cover, firing rapidly at the pair of cannibals across from him. He took the first down without much trouble, but the second returned fire and knocked out his barrier.

Kaidan rolled back behind his rock and pulled his legs up so that he was squatting behind the rock, now on his feet. He waited for Garrus to fire and take out the remaining cannibal. It never happened.

"Garrus?!" he shouted into his coms. "Some cover fire would be great right about now." Nothing. "Vega?! You have eyes on Vakarian?" There was no answer.

**AN: AH! Cliffhanger! The next chapter will be up soon, I promise! Don't hate me!**


	5. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Alas, Bioware and others more fortunate that I own Mass Effect and all it encompasses.**

Chapter 4

Garrus braced the nose of his assault rifle in between two rocks and waited as Alenko and Vega moved off to get in position. He did his best to keep his head down, while still keeping an eye on the gully below. The ginormous monstrosity was stomping its sharp talon-like feet and fluttering its wings in agitation, all the while firing its cannons into the large boulders. He glanced over and used his visor to zoom in on the west end of the small ravine.

He could see Lieutenant Vega making his way carefully down the steep incline on the far side of the large rocks. After a minute he dropped from view and Garrus focused back on his target. He took a second to lay out several extra thermal clips while he waited. It wasn't long before he heard the Major over the coms.

"You in position, LT?" Kaidan's voice came over the com line in his visor.

The harvester chose that moment to launch a large fireball at the ground. The roar shook the ground and caused Garrus to wince.

"Repeat that," the Major ordered, having missed Vega's reply.

"I've got eyes on the Tango, but we've got company, Major."

"That's affirmative. Lay low for now, let Leng deal with those Cannibals for now, step in only if his life is in danger. Garrus, you ready?"

"Yes, sir," the turian grunted and sighted down his rifle to the most venerable looking places on the side of the reaper creatures head and neck

"Then let's do this!"

Garrus opened fire. Another roar caused his eyes to narrow slightly, but he continued to keep the shots flowing. The harvester was moving as far from him as it could, but to no avail. The side of its body was soon peppered with nasty, oozing wounds that smelled worse than foul.

His rifle clicked on empty and he moved with practiced precision as he ejected the clip and slammed a new one home. He was just preparing to aim at the harvester again when movement off to his left caught his attention. He saw the Cerberus operative leaping over rocks, taking full advantage of the reaper forces being distracted to make his escape.

_Where was Vega_? Garrus wondered, anxiety thrumming into his consciousness. He glanced down below him, coming up to his knees to get a better view. Alenko was blasting the Harvester with cold from his omni-tool and the beast looked to be in its death throes. He rose to his feet and stepped closer to the edge, looking for Vega. From his new vantage he could see Vega, his shotgun aimed menacingly at the approaching Kai Leng. Just as the cannibals opened fire below, Vega took his shot, the slugs pelting harmlessly against Leng's biotic barrier. The dark haired assassin shot his right hand forward and used the projectile weapon in his gauntlet to blast Vega back.

James's shields took the brunt of the pressure, but there was still enough force to shove him back. He went flying backwards, his weapon flying from his hand as he hit the ground and started rolling over rocky gravel and debris. He slammed against a low rock, his head snapping harshly.

It had all happened in only a couple of seconds, but Garrus was already on the move. He ran along the ridge at a full sprint, watching intently as Leng approached the downed Lieutenant, drawing his sword with his left hand. As soon as Garrus was above the Cerberus agent, he leaped.

The turian slammed down into Kai Leng with all the momentum of a charging krogan. He made sure the butt-end of his Phaeston slammed into the human's head. The two of them hit the ground and Garrus felt his body irrupt into a plethora of aches and pain, despite the presence of his armor and Kai Leng breaking most of his fall. Even at only .7 g's it was still a fully armored 6'3" turian jumping off a 15' drop from a full sprint.

Vakarian grunted with exertion as he rolled to his stomach and got on all fours. He had lost his grip on his rifle after he hit the ground. He began looking around groggily, his head rattled. He didn't see it, but he noticed Leng, trying to get up nearby. He pushed onto his feet and jumped at the rising man, tackling him to the ground again.

"Stay down," he growled and rammed his fist into the back of Leng's head. He leaned his forearm against the back of his neck and ground his face into the dirt and gravel.

Kai Leng snapped his elbow back, landing squarely in the gash in Garrus' armor. The pain that shot through his chest stole his breath and the turian soon found he was lying flat on his back as the human scrambled for his sword.

Vakarian choked and coughed as he rolled over, trying to get up, he vaguely heard a voice in his ear, calling his name. He forced himself to ignore the voice, the pain, and lack of air as he focused on his rage. It was never far from the surface anymore. Not after Shepard's death and losing his position in C-sec, not after Omega and Sidonis and the deaths of his crew. Not since he'd seen Palaven burning, and especially not since he'd cradled the two halves of his beloved sniper rifle in his talons.

He channeled all of his feelings of loss, frustration and helplessness into one last burst. He leapt at Leng once more, grabbing his wrist as he pushed the human onto his back. He slammed the man's hand into a rock, but he refused to relinquish his grip on the long blade.

Garrus finally gasped in a deep breath and roared his fury. He managed to straddle Leng and punch him in the face with his free right hand, and then he resumed slamming his opponent's right hand repeatedly. He heart bones snapping and grinding, then the sword was loose. Garrus punched the human again, then reached over and grabbed the hilt of the now free sword. Beneath him Kai Leng was knocked nearly senseless. His head was rolling awkwardly, blood running from his nose and mouth and several scrapes on his right cheekbone. Garrus didn't notice any of that. In fact, he wasn't seeing Kai Leng's face anymore. The face he saw was that of Sidonis. He snarled as he brought the sword up and angled it across his enemy's throat.

Leng had enough instinct and strength left to bring his left arm up to push back on Garrus' hand, keeping the blade from his neck. Leng groaned in agony and effort as his strength began to wane. Millimeter, by creeping millimeter, death approached inexorably.

"Garrus!" a familiar voice shouted from above. "Stand down, soldier!"

That voice was using the kind of tone Vakarian, as a turian, was genetically programed to pay attention to. It was also the voice of his Commander.

He stopped pressing down with the sword and sat up slowly, the tension in his body still apparent to all. Leng gasped in relief and lay beneath Garrus breathing hard.

"Stand down," the voice ordered again, not quite as harsh this time.

Garrus looked up into the face of Commander Raina Shepard and locked his eyes on hers. Her hands were empty, but her eyes were loaded. They were pleading, yet stern. He felt his rage melt into grief as he saw those eyes. He dropped his shoulders and lowered his hands to his side. Carefully, he stood, keeping the blade firmly in his grip as he stepped back from the prone Cerberus agent.

Shepard stepped over and held out her hand.

Garrus promptly placed the sword in her outstretched palm. She nodded once and then began looking around. "EDI, watch him," she nodded at Leng. "Tali, see to James," she whispered as she looked up at her turian friend.

For a second he was afraid she would ask him what the hell he thought he was doing. Instead she only asked, "Where's Kaidan?"

Garrus looked over his shoulder back towards the rocks that blocked the gully.

"Here," came Kaidan's voice as he climbed around a large boulder. He was breathing hard and had harvester gore smeared across the right side of his body. His features were hidden behind his faceplate, but Garrus thought he sounded pissed. Again.

The Major scrambled down to where they were and stood next to Shepard, in his hand he now held his Paladin. His eyes moved over the scene much as Shepard's had seconds ago.

"What happened?" he directed the question to Shepard, but it was Garrus that answered first.

"I saw Kai Leng take down Lieutenant Vega and rushed over to assist. I managed to incapacitate Leng just as Shepard arrived." He conveniently left out the part where he had lost control and nearly taken Leng's head off with his own sword.

Shepard nodded with a frown, but gave Garrus a look that said they would be discussing what happened later.

"How's Vega?" She turned and walked to where Tali was bent over the fallen soldier. The quarian had unlocked his helmet and was pulling it off.

"Just a minor concussion," she said, scanning him with her omni-tool again. "A few other bumps and bruises, but he should be fine."

James chose that moment to groan and open his eyes. "Sparks?" he asked, looking around. "What the…" he tried to sit up, but was promptly pushed back down by the wiry engineer.

"Take it easy, you've hit your head," Tali whispered sternly, ignoring the nickname.

"You outta know by now, my head's a lot harder than most things," he said with a lopsided smirk, though there was still a tightness around his eyes that suggested he was sporting a massive headache. "It'll take more than that to keep me down." He managed to sit up with her help. When he spotted Kai Leng, still lying on the ground, with EDI standing over him, her pistol trained on his chest. "Guess we got what we came for, eh, Commander."

Shepard half grunted half scoffed. "No thanks to you, Lieutenant. I think next time you should wait till we're back on the Normandy before you go down for your afternoon nap."

"Hey, now, I knew you guys had it." He rubbed the back of his head and then Tali helped him to his feet.

"Uh huh," Shepard sounded skeptical as she crossed her arms over her chest, but there was a ghost of a smile on her lips.

Kaidan scowled and stepped forward. "Perhaps we should get the prisoner back to the ship and lock him down."

Suddenly serious again, Shepard crouched down next to their Cerberus prisoner and eyed him warily as she waved his sword back and forth over his chest. "You look pretty beat up," she commented taking in his face and various other apparent injuries. "I'm thinking now would be a good time to play nice and cooperate."

Shepard couldn't see his eyes behind his cybernetic mask, but she knew he was looking at her. "For now," he said with a shrug. Aside from the damage done by Garrus he appeared to have a piece of shrapnel lodged in his right shoulder, and a large gash down his left side, probably from the shuttle crash.

"Can you stand on your own?" she asked quietly, her voice not exactly gentle, just calm and controlled.

He looked down, as if assessing his wounds before nodding. "I don't have to tell you not to try anything," she said in that same low tone.

He might have rolled his eyes under his mask, but she wasn't sure. He did move slowly as he sat up, though. When he was sitting she stopped him. "Take off those gauntlets and remove your pistol, nice and slow."

He did, a little too slowly. She noticed he attempted to suppress a wince as he pulled off his right gauntlet, attempted and failed. He had to use his left hand to reach over and remove the pistol from his right hip as well. His right hand was swollen and mottled red and purple.

Shepard reached out with a toe and scooted the items away, reaching down and removing a thin blade from the side his boot as well. "This all?" she asked, examining the palm of his right gauntlet.

His lip ticked in a subtle smirk.

"Sure." His tone implied that it wasn't and that she'd never know how many weapons he was concealing.

She gave another one of her half scoffing grunts. "That's all." Shepard stood and fingered her coms. "Cortez, we're ready for pick up. "

"Copy that, ma'am. I'll be there in five." Cortez spoke through her helmet radio.

The Commander turned to Kaidan, who was standing close with his pistol aimed at Kai Leng's chest. "Major, we commandeered one of Sanctuary's shuttles. Why don't you see if you can find a med kit on board we can use to patch up our prisoner. It's just over the rise there," she motioned to the North, over the other side of the slope.

Kaidan took off up the steep slope and Shepard turned back to Kai Leng, eyeing him critically as he got to his feet. He was obviously in pain, but he squared his shoulders and stood up straight, the gash in his side reopening with his movement and allowing fresh blood to trickle over his hip.

"Cuff him," Shepard ordered Tali, who, not so gently, obeyed, jerking his arms behind his back one at a time.

Shepard smiled grimly. This was a win for her team, a big one. It just didn't feel like it, yet. She still needed answers, and judging from Leng's determination not to show weakness or submission, she wasn't sure how she was going to get those answers. She contemplated what she might have to do to get him to give up his Cerberus master and the VI Vendetta. Maybe they'd get lucky and he'd have a data file in his back pocket that contained a map to the illusive man, as well as the name and location of every Cerberus facility. Maybe, but she doubted it.

* * *

Back aboard the Normandy, Dr. Chakwas had her hands full. They managed to get Leng into the med bay and sedated without any incidents. The good doctor then saw to Vega and Garrus, patching the later up quickly and sending him on his way and dosing the former with medi-gel and putting him into bed for observation. Then she had the monumental task of removing all of Leng's gear.

They stripped him of his armored coat and face mask, exposing a maze work of cybernetic implants under the skin that connected with the armor through external nodes that were situated in strategic places. His temples, both forearms and wrists all had the exposed discs of metal the size of a pencil eraser. Dr. Chakwas cleaned up the wounds on his face and side and removed the shrapnel from his shoulder before sewing him up. His upper body would take a couple days to recover fully, even with regular medical attention and his augmentations. That shoulder injury was especially nasty.

His legs were another story. When Chakwas finally managed to remove the armored leggings she found that all of the skeletal muscle tissue in his thighs and calves was infused with cybernetic nano-fibers that penetrated nearly every strand of muscle. His joints and long bones had also been reinforced with titanium plating in order to support the increased strength of the muscle tissue.

After she had him patched up and examined she called for Shepard, who was just finishing debriefing her non-injured crew. She had set EDI and Tali to trying to hack Leng's omni-tool and get any information that they could from that, and had asked Chakwas for an update on how soon their prisoner would be ready for interrogation. The news she got did not make her happy.

"I'm worried about his cybernetics," Karin told her bluntly. "He's barely human anymore and there's no telling what he's capable of when he's in top condition. I wouldn't trust regular restraints to hold him. I'm going to recommend we keep him sedated for now, but I know you're anxious to question him."

That was putting it mildly, Shepard though.

Out loud she said "Is there anything we can do to disable his cybernetics? Can they be removed?"

The Normandy's doctor frowned deeply. "Theoretically, some could, yes, but I don't have the equipment, or the surgical expertise to do it here. "

"Some?" Shepard queried.

"The ones in his arms and head, maybe. I haven't really examined to what extent they're linked into his nervous system. His legs, though. The implants are so seamlessly integrated into his own tissue that only my deep scans could recognize any difference at all. There's nothing short of amputation that would work on those." The good doctor sounded equal parts awed and revolted.

"Amputation, huh? Well, let's not rule it out, but hopefully we won't have to resort to such… extreme measures."

"Shepard!" Karin Chakwas gasped, sounding aghast.

"That was a joke, Karin," she said with a sardonic grin. _Mostly_, she added mentally.

The older woman just shook her head in a reproving fashion. "I'm serious Shepard. I've only ever seen the like of his upgrades once before." She did not need to elaborate.

Shepard shrugged. "Cerberus knows what they're doing."

"Yes but it's even better with Leng. They were worried about restoring you to what you had been. With him, I imagine their purpose was to make him as strong and fast as they could."

Shepard nodded at that, a frown creasing her brow. Was Dr. Chakwas trying to tell her that Leng was too much for even the infamous Commander Shepard? Raina wasn't sure, but that seemed to be the reason for the Doctor's excessively intense warning.

"Noted. For now we can keep him under. I'll wait till Tali and EDI have had a chance to work their magic before I make any decisions. In the mean time I want you to run more tests. See if there's any way that we can disable all those fancy alterations without cutting off any important pieces."

From across the room Vega spoke up for the first time. "If the doc here is feeling too squeamish, I can help you with that. I owe this cabrón some payback, you know."

"Don't mind the Lieutenant, he's on some pretty good meds for his head," Chakwas and Shepard both chuckled at that and Vega tried to look offended.

"I'll keep that in mind, James," Shepard gave him a smile and then turned away shaking her head. "Keep me posted. I've got to check in with Hackett, but I want you to tell me as if there's any change in his condition.

She would just have to be patient for a little longer. After she gave her report to Hackett she would see if EDI and Tali had made any progress.

* * *

It turned out that Tali and EDI had made quite a bit of progress.

"Shepard!" Tali yelled excitedly when the Commander walked into the war room where her two techies were working on their little hacking project.

"Looks like good news?" she asked with raised eyebrows.

"Indeed," EDI said with her normally level voice. "We have succeeded in accessing the information on Kai Leng's omni-tool. The amount of data we have retrieved so far is quite staggering. It is quite proportionate to the number of firewalls and technical defenses we had to work through. They were no match for us, however."

"Ah, EDI, I see humility is not a human trait you have a grasp on, yet," Shepard said fondly with a smile.

"Humility doesn't enter into it. I'm simply stating a proven fact," EDI retorted with her own smile.

"What have you found so far?" Shepard asked, turning focus back to the task at hand. She was trying to keep up her normal friendly banter with her crew, but, truth be told, her heart just wasn't in it. It felt mostly like she was going through the motions, while her insides churned and she did her best to maintain her normal face like some kind of mask over the surface of that turbulence. Her professional and logical side demanded that she not let those that depended on her see how much she wanted, no, scratch that, needed to get back at Cerberus.

Cerberus had taken so much from her. True, she would still be dead without them, but in a way that was just one more thing they'd stolen from her. She was here now and was determined to do everything in her power to fight this war, but part of her resented being forced to be here. She had been at peace when… before they had brought her back. No responsibility, no galaxy balanced on the brink of annihilation depending on her, no more missions, or impossible objectives… she forced those terribly depressing thoughts back into the mental vault she usually kept them in and slammed the door. Those kinds of thoughts and feelings did no one any good, least of all her.

"The prothean VI was not among the programs, unfortunately, but we were able to retrieve all of the research data Kai Leng had extracted from Sanctuary." EDI explained.

"You mean from their experiments on the refugees," Shepard said, disgust and contempt curling her lip ever so slightly.

Tali's excitement was taken down a notch when she noticed Shepard's lack of enthusiasm. "Yes, from those experiments." She linked her fingers nervously and then continued. "Don't get me wrong, Shepard, I'm not condoning those experiments. They were monstrously evil on a whole new level of monstrous evil. That fact is not in question." She regained some of her former fervor. "That doesn't change the fact that they were done, though. We can't change what happened, but we can make sure that those lives weren't wasted. What we have here is extremely valuable information that we can use against the Reapers and Cerberus."

What Tali was saying was true, but that didn't mean she had to like it. "What kind of information," Shepard asked, resignedly.

It was EDI that answered her. "The experiments were designed to discover how the reapers communicate between themselves, as well as how they control their modified troops, husks and the like. They managed to unlock the secrets of quite a large selection of reaper technology, as well as the methods and intricacies of indoctrination."

"Well, that's nothing new," Shepard scowled, "We know Cerberus has had access to reaper tech for a while now, and they've been using indoctrination to recruit new members to their twisted little club. Plus, Saren was doing experiments with indoctrination, as well."

Tali jumped back in. "Yes, but Cerberus has delved more in depth then Saren ever dreamed. Not only did they understand indoctrination enough to duplicate it, but they managed to figure out how to block it preventively, as well as cure it. They also figured out how to turn the reaper's signal to their advantage. They can turn the minor reaper forces back on their masters. They haven't really figured out the logistics of using that information on a large scale, but…"

Tali's rambling was cut off as Shepard spoke up, interrupting her with a stunned gesture. "Wait, did you say they figured out how to cure indoctrination?"

"That's right, Shepard," EDI nodded.

"A cure for reaper indoctrination?" she asked, needing clarification.

"Yes."

"And we can assume that the same principles would work on Cerberus' own brand of indoctrination as well?" Shepard's thoughts were boiling with the possibilities.

"Well, that's the thing," Tali responded, her urgency to explain evident. "EDI and I have been trying to decide whether there's even a difference between the two at all. We were just discussing the fact that it's more likely that the reapers have managed to indoctrinate the illusive man into thinking he can control the reapers so that they use Cerberus to fight against us, just like they've been doing. He in turn has subjected his people to the reapers indoctrination, believing himself to be in control the whole time."

"Then why do the experiments at all? We know the reapers felt that Sanctuary posed a threat to them. If they have total control of Cerberus then why not just keep them from ordering the experiments, or sabotaging them along the way?" Shepard had always suspected the illusive man was under reaper influence, but some things here just weren't adding up.

"It's essentially the same as it was for Saren. The reapers couldn't risk indoctrinating them so deeply they become mindless husks." Tali reasoned.

"Besides," added EDI, "The Illusive man was too smart to use his own people to do the research. He petitioned Henry Lawson to do the work for him, which is why it took so long for the reapers to catch on."

"Yeah, but if this data had gotten back to the Illusive Man, we can only guess at how much of it he would be able to use. Chances are the reapers would have had him ignore the part about a cure and focus on the things that they can use to further manipulate Cerberus for their own ends." Tali was on a roll now.

"Things the reapers already know and can control." Shepard said, coming full circle.

"Correct," EDI said with a smile.

"Except the Illusive man didn't get the data back. We swiped it before that happened," Shepard smiled at that.

"And we CAN use it against the reapers." Tali sounded like she was smiling, too.

"And Cerberus," EDI didn't really smile, but she sounded as please as Shepard had ever heard the AI sound.

"And Cerberus," Shepard echoed, and she knew just where she was going to start. "EDI, I want you to keep working on this data. I want to be able to implement a cure as soon as possible."

"Understood," EDI said and moved back to the console.

"Tali, I want you to assist Dr. Chakwas with figuring out how to restrain Kai Leng. I have a feeling she's going to need someone to advise her on the technical side of things, and I want to have him secured and conscious ASAP."

"Of course, Shepard, right away," Tali said and turned to go, but not before she noticed a particularly devious gleam in the Commander's eyes.

**AN: As always, feel free to let me know what you think about the story so far!**


	6. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Wish I owned it, but I don't. Sad face.**

Chapter 5

It took her team five days to get everything figured out. Dr. Chakwas kept Kai Leng sedated while her and Tali figured out how to render him harmless. Well, mostly harmless. They might still have been working on the problem if Tali hadn't made a fortuitous discovery on the second day. By sheer luck she discovered that the armored pants that Kai Leng wore weren't just for protection, or to make some kind of bad ass fashion statement.

The metallic weave of the fabric was laced with sensors and diodes that served as a bio electromagnetic conductors that enhanced the signal in his cybernetic implants. They weren't necessary for them to function, they just helped his implants function more efficiently, but it inspired the two women. Using the same principles, only in reverse, they were able to adapt a set of under armor garments that hindered the functionality of his implants. It wasn't enough to render him immobile, but it knocked him down a few rungs on the superhuman scale. Between the bio electromagnetic disruptors sewn into his clothes and some heavy duty enhanced restraining cuffs on his wrists and ankles they figured he was as safe as they could make him with what they had on hand and the time available.

EDI also had rapid success with figuring out the necessary principles of indoctrination and what was involved in blocking the reaper's signal as well as undoing any changes made during indoctrination. It was pretty complex stuff, which she tried explaining to Shepard and the rest of the crew, with limited success. Though her technical background was fairly extensive, Shepard wasn't a physicist or a psychologist. She understood the basics, sort of. She trusted that EDI understood it, however, and with Dr. Chakwas' help with the medical side of things they had a prototype figured out in record time.

The "cure" they had come up with consisted of an intracranial injection consisting of a rather complex mixture of large, unpronounceable chemicals, paired with a small device that acted to mask the individual from the reapers signal. Apparently, once someone was exposed to the reaper's influence they had a "taste" for that person's individual brainwave pattern and could "sniff" you out and "lock on" to you no matter where you were. (Shepard spent several minutes trying to explain mixing metaphors to EDI after the AI had tried explaining indoctrination in that way to Shepard. Both women had ended the conversation gratefully, despite feeling like they had missed getting their point through to the other.)

Regardless of everyone's level of understanding of the intricacies of indoctrination or the nuance of humanity's many figures of speech, Shepard was impatient to begin their little experiment, and she trusted that all her people could handle their individual areas of expertise.

In between coordinating the Kai Leng project and the indoctrination cure, she had reported to Hackett, had a sit down with Garrus, and fielded concerns by half her crew about her plans for their Cerberus prisoner. At this point, she felt she deserved a medal for her infinite patience and diplomacy.

Hackett had been pleased to hear about her success on Horizon, but had raised his own concerns about her keeping Kai Leng on the Normandy. He had wanted her to turn him over to Alliance Command, but she'd flat out refused that, much to the Admiral's displeasure. She had promised him copies of the Sanctuary research data as a consolation prize and that had mollified him. For now. She also promised to consider her options for a more permanent solution for detaining such a dangerous Cerberus operative, and she fully intended to keep that promise, as soon as she had all the answers she needed.

She understood the risk of keeping someone like Kai Leng aboard an Alliance vessel long term, but the fact of the matter was, she just didn't trust anyone else to keep him out of Cerberus' clutches. The pro-human terrorists had people everywhere. They had infiltrated every level of the Alliance military and government. They had managed to corrupt Udina, the human member of the Citadel Council, for crying out loud. She wasn't going to take any chances.

If she'd had a top-secret facility somewhere maybe she could have used that, but she didn't. She only had her ship and her crew. For now, she would just have to rely on the things she knew she could trust.

Her conversation with Garrus had also managed to raise her stress level. She understood, to a large extent, what she thought he was going through. She had known Garrus for a while now, and he'd been with her for most of that time. She'd seen him struggle with his dissatisfaction with the legal system, and his overwhelming desire for justice. She'd also seen what happened to him when that desire for justice tipped over that razor sharp line, and turned into a lust for vengeance.

Shepard remembered how close he'd been to putting a bullet between the eyes of an unarmed turian, a turian that had been a member of his team. True, Sidonis had betrayed Garrus and caused the death of the rest of their team members. It was probably also true that Sidonis had deserved that bullet more than a little. Nevertheless, Shepard knew what could happen to someone that gave into vengeance. It wasn't for Sidonis' sake that she'd talked Garrus down. It was for Garrus'.

She had hoped that he would be able to understand that. She didn't think he had. His attraction for vengeance hadn't abated at all. If anything it was worse, much worse.

The worst part about their little talk had been that the whole time she was trying to talk him down and get him to see reason; she had felt like the worst hypocrite in the world. Hell, the galaxy.

"Do you even know why you lost it?" she had asked him.

"I don't know, Shepard," he had replied, sounding frustrated and exasperated. "I was just so… angry! Between Cerberus and the reapers … I mean, we're doing everything we can, working miracles of diplomacy and beating unbeatable odds, and yet, every time we turn around there's some new insurmountable problem. It's just… so much to handle! I don't know how you stay so calm! Every time I see that damned hexagon I just can't stop thinking about how those idiots are going to be the reason every advanced life-form in the galaxy is killed by those soulless robots!"

"I can't tell you how to feel, Garrus, and believe me when I say I'm sympathetic, but we can't let them get to us, otherwise, we've already lost. We're going to do everything we can to stop Cerberus and the reapers. We've got a better shot at that now, more than ever, but we have to keep it together. We have to keep being the biggest damn heroes in the galaxy, and that doesn't leave any room for losing our shit, especially in the field. We're better than that. You're better than that." She was using her stern, yet compassionate voice.

"And what happens if I'm not," Garrus whispered darkly. He was staring somewhere off to her left, refusing to meet her gaze.

"You are!" she exclaimed, reaching out and grabbing the front of his armor. She pulled him closer and forced him to look her in the eye. "Listen to me! We've been through a lot together. We know each other better than most married couples. Am I right?"

He chuckled, a bit awkwardly and nodded, trying to look down. She shook him gently and moved into his line of sight again. "I'm right. I know you and I would trust you with my back above anyone else. I have seen you at your best, and your worst. I know when things fall apart you are the one who keeps the rest of us in line." She held his gaze and gave him a sympathetic smile.

"I know things have been getting worse and worse. We just have to get better and better. Simple." She released his armor and stepped back. "We just have to, so we will."

Garrus took a shaky breath and leaned back, eyeing her with awe. It was a look that made her gut clench. His words made it worse. "How do you do it? How do you stay so calm, even when the universe seems set on destroying everything you know and hold dear?"

"Practice," she said with a deliberate smile that she hoped covered the way his words cut her deeply. "And it helps to have some way to take out your frustration, off the field," she added in concession.

"You mean, like a hobby?" he laughed, the tension finally easing in the room.

"Sure, a hobby, or some form of recreation." She shrugged, and stepped away determined to change the subject. "Our lives are filled with so much strife and struggle. We need something good in our lives to remind us what we're fighting for and keep us from losing our minds. "

Garrus gave her an odd look. "Something, or someone?"

She tried not to choke on her laughter and pushed him lightly on his shoulder. "Pick one." She eyed his still damaged armor. "And get that armor fixed, soldier. I'm sure Vega has something that will work."

"Sure, I'll go see him now," Garrus look a deep breath and sighed as he stared back into her face, "and thanks, Shepard. I guess it's a good thing you're here to pull me back from the brink now and then."

"It's not a glamorous job, but someone's gotta do it," she gave him a lopsided grin and pushed him towards the door. "Now get out of here, I've got work to do."

When he was gone she sank down into the chair at her desk and put her head between her knees. She locked her fingers behind her neck and tried to breathe long and deep breaths. Most of the time, she was able to forget about all the things that were screaming for her attention lately. When she was in the field it was easy to focus on the mission. When she was working out in the cargo bay, lifting weights or sparing with Vega she was able to get into that same zone where her focus was pinpoint sharp on the task before her.

Any other time though, it felt like she was trapped in a room that was slowly filling with water. Or perhaps it was blood. Anytime she stopped to think about the situation she couldn't help but remember the dire consequences that could result if she failed. She couldn't help but see the faces of those she had failed. Her parents, her brothers and sister, her entire crew on Akuze, Wrex, Ashley, Zaeed, Thane, Samara and her daughters, Mordin, Kirrahe, Legion, Lt. Kurin and her squad, Miranda… Not to mention the countless nameless faces that now haunted her. How many more would fall before this was over. Would any of them be able to survive? Could they win? Was it just arrogance to think they even had a shot to defeat the reapers?

She let out a breath and rested her face in one palm. She needed a distraction. This melancholy wasn't her. She needed to shake it off, just like she'd told Garrus. She just needed a new hobby, something to distract her when she had too much time to think. As soon as she had a free minute to herself, she'd figure that out.

She called down to Dr. Chakwas and had Kai Leng, dressed in his BED clothes and restraints, taken to life support. The room wasn't being used currently and still had a table and chairs that suited her need perfectly. She informed Dr. Chakwas to prepare the necessary injections, but to hold off on administering them. In order to evaluate accurately if the cure was having any effect she needed to get a baseline reading. She knew for a fact that Kai Leng was indoctrinated, the prothean VI had confirmed as much on Thessia. Shepard didn't know what kind of effects the injections would have, or if they would do anything at all, but she was determined to do this properly. She'd had both Dr. Chakwas and Dr. T'Soni help her figure out the best way to test EDI's cure and evaluate its effectiveness as well as any side effects.

When she stepped out of the elevator she was met by a glaring Kaidan. He was staring at the door to life support like it might burst open and release a pack of rabid varren. She glanced down at the data pad in her hand and hoped that if she didn't make eye contact he wouldn't say anything.

"Commander, if you have a minute, I'd like a word," Kaidan said in a dry, professional tone.

She glanced at him and gave him a nod. "Of course, Major, what's on your mind?"

He gestured to the Starboard Observation Deck, and she led the way. Once the doors had close behind them she turned and faced him, her face set in a calm mask of stone. These little chats with Kaidan were never easy. They had both tried to put the past behind them. There were more important things now then all the feelings and history between them, and she was glad to have him here, she really was. He was competent and trustworthy. He got the job done, and that's just what her team needed.

Her heart, however, was a different story. Looking at Kaidan brought on a deeply conflicted swell of emotion. She still cared about him, still fondly remembered their time together on the SR-1, still dreamed of the time she'd spent in his arms. They were some of the happiest memories she had, and yet, she couldn't help but feel that twist of pain every time she looked in those amazing amber eyes. She would never forget the anger, the accusation they'd held for her on Horizon, and again on Mars. She'd never, ever forget the way her heart had stopped beating when she'd been looking down the barrel of his weapon.

Things were better than they'd been. Kaidan had even told her that he still cared, that he was willing to try again. She hadn't turned him down, so much as told him she needed time. She just wasn't sure they had the kind of time it would take for her get over how much he'd hurt her.

"What can I do for you, Kaidan?" She was proud of how smooth and confident she sounded.

"Is it true you plan on interrogating the prisoner alone?" He didn't sound like he was accusing her of something truly heinous, but that was how his eyes and the tightness around his mouth read.

"Yes, I want to limit his exposure to the crew as much as possible. Besides, I'm trying to lull him into a false sense of security in hopes of trying to gain his trust, especially after we administer the cure. I don't want him to feel threatened or intimidated." That wasn't entirely true. The entire truth was, she wasn't sure how far she was going to have to take her interrogating techniques. She didn't want anyone around to witness things if she had to resort to less … ethical modes of persuasion. She couldn't tell Kaidan that, though. He, more than most, would never agree to allow such treatment to a prisoner. She didn't need to see anymore disappointment in his eyes.

"You don't want HIM to feel threatened? What about you? Don't you feel threatened?" His eyes were more demanding now. "It isn't safe for you to be alone with that monster."

"I can handle myself, Kaidan. The Docs and Tali have been working day and night to make sure that he won't be a threat." She held up a hand to stop his farther protests. "If it will make you feel better, you and a dozen armed guards can be waiting outside the door. I'll call you if I need help."

He continued to scowl. "And what if you don't get a chance to call for help?"

"Then you and those dozen guards can take him down when he tries to leave." She was trying to keep any trace of the heavy sigh she felt building in her chest from actually escaping.

"But you'll already be dead, Shepard. You have to remember, you're not expendable, Commander. You are more important to the war effort than any information this creep could give us." He was giving her the deeply intense kind of eye contact that she used to treasure from him. Now it was making her chest ache.

"First off," she sighed looking away from his gaze, "you don't know that's true. Secondly, if I can't take an unarmed, fully restrained, semi-sedated man with a shoulder injury then I really need to be replaced." She tried to shrug it off with a laugh, but when she tried to walk away, Kaidan reached out and gripped her upper arm gently.

"Raina, please. I'm just worried about you." His voice and his eyes were soft. She felt her stomach flip when he said her name. She reached out instinctually and put her hand on his bicep.

"I'll be fine," she smiled lazily, masking her inner turmoil, "really. I promise to call for back up if he so much as sneezes funny." She pushed down on his arm until he had released her. Then she gave his shoulder a reassuring pat and walked around him. "Was there anything else?" she asked, walking backwards as the door opened behind her.

"No, that's all for now," he said, straitening his shoulders and trying to shake off his defeated look.

"Okay then, go get your dozen heavily armed guards," she winked and then turned away, hiding her relief.

Kaidan wasn't the only one that was concerned about her decision to question Kai Leng alone, but he was the only one that might have been able to talk her out of it, had he been any pushier. Lucky her, he was trying to give her time and space. That meant no pushy. For now.

* * *

They had already brought Leng to the room when she arrived. She passed through the doors, data pad in hand, and walked into life support with her game face on. She nodded to the ensign who was standing at attention next to the table where Kai had been cuffed, his ankle shackles linked to the legs of his chair, and his wrist shackles threaded to a link in the center of the table.

With all of his armor and gear removed he was almost unrecognizable. It was a shock to be able to look into his eyes. They were a rich chocolate brown with strong straight brows. He looked so human now.

She studied his Chinese features with a dash of Slavic heritage thrown in for good measure. He studied her right back as she pulled out the chair across from him and sat, crossing her legs casually, setting the data pad in her lap.

"Thank you, Ensign, that will be all," she dismissed the guard just as casually and continued to study her prisoner. Once he was gone she waited another minute before beginning. "How's your shoulder healing up?" Her voice was the same low, deliberate one she'd used with him on Horizon.

"It's just peachy," he said with an amused lilt to his voice that was only mildly condescending.

"Glad to hear it," she answered right back. "So, Kai Leng, where's my prothean VI?"

He grinned widely. "Guess you aren't wasting time with small talk. You're very direct. I like that." He didn't answer her question.

"Yes, I am, and I would appreciate it if you would be direct in return. I'm not really interested in wasting either of our time. Well, not mine, at any rate. Where's Vendetta?" She didn't return his grin, but kept her face blank and her voice level.

"You want direct? Very well. I don't have it, obviously, and I'm NEVER going to tell you where it is." He never dropped the grin from his face, but his tone was cold and serious.

Shepard continued to look him over, from the casual way his hands were linked together to the way he leaned back almost lazily in his chair. He was projecting confident ease. She made eye contact and tried to weigh whether this was a carefully constructed façade, or if he really was that secure in his position. She knew he was good at what he did, and knew he knew he was good. The fact that he had managed to get away from her twice said something about his talents. She also thought it said he wasn't above running away if the situation called for it.

"Let me guess, you think that because I'm supposed to be the good guy, I'm not going to have what it takes to… convince you to tell me what I need to know. You've decided to just stay quiet and hope that you'll either get a chance to escape or be rescued by the Illusive Man. Is that about right?"

Kai Leng gave a half shrug that suggested that was close enough.

"You are probably skilled enough to take advantage of even the smallest opportunity, should one present itself. Someone's bound to screw up eventually, right? And if they don't, well, your faith in your boss will probably eventually bear fruit. He's pulled your ass from the fire before, if my intel is good. Even if he doesn't think you're worth the efforts to attempt a rescue then the research data from Sanctuary certainly is. We both know it's only a matter of time." She set the data pad down, out of his reach, onto the table top.

"I'm surprised by your acceptance of the inevitable," he said with a tilt of his head. He was looking at her as though she was a particularly adorable puppy that had just performed some equally adorable trick. "I guess I shouldn't be so surprised. I had heard you were practical enough by nature. I just figured your own deluded idealism would ultimately prevent you from coming around to see reason."

Shepard raised one eyebrow slowly as he spoke. "My deluded idealism?" She resisted the urge to throw back her head and laugh. "I think there's a joke in there about pots and kettles," she said, finally returning his grin. His own never faltered. "Please, enlighten me."

"You think that by "uniting" the council races and joining forces to destroy the reapers you'd actually be doing everyone a favor, right? The fact of the matter is, you're simply fooling yourself. Whether they can set aside their differences and join forces now matters little. After this war is over, if any of them survive, then the feeding frenzy will really begin. If you get your way, this galaxy is doomed to tear itself apart. I'm guessing it'll be the Krogan that make the first move, nice work there, by the way. You've managed to unleash a weapon of incredibly deadly potential. Maybe next time the Salarians will figure out a way to wipe their race out completely, instead of just crippling their ability to reproduce. I give the asari and turians a century, given their weakened states. The Salarians might survive longer, they're slippery bastards. Humanity, though." He shook his head mournfully and let his grin fade. "Tell me, Commander Shepard," the venom dripped from his voice when he said her name, "How does it feel to be the one that single-handedly signed humanity's death warrant?"

Shepard suppressed any and all emotional response to his words and turned his confident ease back at him. "For someone that represents such strong humanity-first ideals, you certainly don't think very much of your own race."

He laughed, his poisonous hate melting away like snow in summer. "Well, some of humanity will survive, sure. Cerberus will make sure of that. Don't worry, Commander, we're used to cleaning up after your messes by now."

"You're cleaning up my…" now she did laugh. "That's a switch. Here I was thinking I was the one cleaning up after you." She waited a beat, using her most brilliant smile on her prisoner before she took it down to an amused smirk. "Guess we'll just have to agree to disagree."

"If you like," Kai Leng matched her smirk like a pro.

"Well, so much for direct," she chuckled and picked up the data pad again. "I think it's time we got back to my questions, don't you?" When he said nothing, she took that as assent. "Where is the Illusive Man?"

"If I told you that, he wouldn't be so illusive, now would he?" he fired back.

"What is the Cerberus planning next?" She asked, biding her time for now, knowing this was a delicate game they played now.

"Couldn't say, I'm more a doer then a planner myself."

"I see, and just how long have you been indoctrinated?"

That made him pause, for half a second. "Who says I'm indoctrinated?" His casual smile dimmed almost unperceptively, but Shepard caught it.

"Vendetta, the prothean VI. Didn't you hear that part?" She glanced down at her data pad and pretended to study. "Yes, the second you stepped into the temple on Thessia, our cheery little VI reported that he had detected an indoctrinated presence. I'm assuming he meant you. He didn't seem to have any such objections to me or any of my team."

There was silence, heavy and pulsing between them. "You're lying." All pretense of glib defiance was gone.

"No," she said, firmly, stone faced once again. "I'm not."

She watched him for a reaction. His left eye twitched, twice. His jaw clenched together for a few uncontrolled seconds before relaxing again. His breathing became just a fraction more shallow and rapid than before. It seemed she had finally managed to ruffle his feathers.

"Vendetta also informed us that this is something the reapers apparently do every cycle. During the last one, the protheans had a group of separatist determined to try and control the reapers rather than destroy them. They were also indoctrinated and manipulated by the reapers to insight conflict and make the reapers job easier. Sound familiar?" She continued watching him sharply.

"Of course that's what you would say if you were being manipulated by the reapers yourself," he shrugged, trying to dismiss her argument.

She leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms under her breasts. "Sure, for the sake of argument, let's say I'm the one who's under their spell. What would I gain by trying to convince you that it was you they were using? If I was under their influence, I'm sure they'd just use me to indoctrinate you and end our conflict."

His eyes narrowed at her as she spoke in her regulated, matter-of-fact way. "So the only way to convince me, is… not to convince me."

"I'll admit, that's not really a viable option. I am going to do my best to convince you, regardless, and you're really going to love the next part." She couldn't help but smile again, the power and the payback giving her an intense thrill that tickled the sadistic sliver in her personality. "Thanks to the research data we retrieved from you, from that delightful little project of Henry Lawson's on Sanctuary, we've been able to develop a cure for indoctrination. Of which you will be the very first beneficiary." She said the last words very slowly.

"Unless you're indoctrinated, in which case…" his voice trailed off as his nostrils flared and his eyes flashed with anger. "No. No way!"

"That's just what you'd say if you were indoctrinated," she said, growing tired of the argument. "Lucky for you, I'm not giving you a choice and I'm not lying, and I'm not the one that's working for the reapers. Cerberus is, the Illusive Man is, and you are. Just not for much longer."

In an instant he was jerking his arms up, snarling and pulling away from the table and from her. His restraints held, though and she stood slowly, stepping back, further out of his reach.

He continued to struggle against his bonds for a few more minutes, to no avail. With a frustrated growl he gave up, his chest heaving and his wrists chaffed and raw, nearly bleeding.

"What have you done to me," he gasped finally, dropping back into his chair. Shepard could tell he was exhausted, from just a few moments of exertion. The BED clothes were working perfectly.

"I'm not going to give you details, obviously, but just know we've managed to successfully disrupt your cybernetic processes. The more you try to use them, the more they will drain your energy. You see, if I wanted you indoctrinated, I'd have done it while you were out and saved myself the trouble of these little chats. You should try and see that as a good sign I'm telling the truth."

Kai Leng laughed bitterly at that and sagged back against the table, leaning his forearms on the cold metal surface. "That will hardly convince me. From what I can tell you seem to be getting quite a kick out of this. Your file never mentioned you had a penchant for the sadistic."

She felt her own lip twitch in response. "I usually don't, but for you, I'll make an exception."

**AN: YAY! Two chapters in one week! More to come, I'm feeling inspired and working my butt off. Of course, reviews always help me work faster! Let me know what you think of their first mono a mono. More to come, I promise!**


	7. Chapter 6

**AN: Okay people, there are a couple warnings on this chapter. This chapter is quite a bit darker, since it's from Kai Leng's perspective, so language and profanity and so on, plus there is just a bit of violence and disturbing images. Nothing too, too major, but you've been warned. Also, I feel like poor Kai is a tad bit ooc here, but mostly because of the indoctrination stuff. Once we get that cleared up for him he'll be much more Lengy. **

**Disclaimer: Mass Effect is owned by people who are not me. **

Chapter 6

Kai Leng was having a bad day. He hadn't so much woken up, as much as he'd become conscious, rousing slowly from a deep and drug induced slumber. He had never particularly cared for the sensation of coming out of sedation. It had been necessary a few times in his life to undergo such a state, for one reason or another, and he always felt a lingering vulnerability afterwards. You never knew what someone had done to you, or with you, while you were so out of it and insensible.

Especially in a situation like this, where he'd gone under in enemy custody and still in his armor, and awoke wearing… What was he wearing?

He was still sufficiently hazy as he looked down and examined his new threads. They appeared to be standard Alliance under armor, a single piece garment made of durable flexible Kevlar type fabric that zipped up the back. It was skin tight with long sleeves and pant legs that were cinched at the ankles and wrists. Worst of all it was complete with a shiny Alliance logo on the left side of his chest.

He resisted the urge to grind his teeth together and snarl. He had sworn he would never wear Alliance issue anything again. Not after they had sold him out and sentenced him unjustly in order to play nice with the krogans. He forced himself to ignore that insult, minor as it was and focus on his surroundings.

He was in this new garb, shackled at wrist and ankle with bright, metallic cuffs that looked heavier than normal restraints. He was lying on a bed in the back of what looked to be a large medical treatment room, and there were half a dozen people standing around the bed, watching him expectantly. Four of them had pistols drawn and aimed at his face. The other two, one an older woman with her omni-tool out, scanning him thoroughly, the other a quarian holding a nasty looking taser in one three-fingered hand.

It seemed they weren't going to be taking any chances with him. That was smart of them, but he wouldn't have expected anything less from the crew of the Normandy. He would have to wait and watch carefully, for now.

"How are you feeling?" the older woman asked him, filling the tense silence with her stern, capable voice. Kai Leng searched through his mental database quickly until he found a name to go with the face. Dr. Karin Chakwas, formally employed by Cerberus as medical doctor on the Normandy SR-2. Just another Shepard-loyalist, and a traitor.

He kept his face blank and pushed through his drowsy state to assess his body. When they'd put him under he'd been in a considerable amount of pain from several different injures. He still had some lingering pain in his right shoulder, dull and throbbing, even through the fog of the drugs lingering in his system. There were also several places, his side and his face mostly, where he could feel the tight pull of newly healed skin. His left hand was wrapped tightly in a transparent brace. It seemed they had patched him up. He estimated he'd been under for less than a week, but not much less.

"Fine," he said finally, sitting up slowly. The armed men standing nearby all tensed and adjusted their aim to follow his movement. _All this for little old me_, he thought, _Shepard must be feeling paranoid. Good._

It meant that she had, at least, a healthy respect for his abilities. It might have been more advantageous to him for her to remain ignorant of his full potential, but he could work with this, too. Caution and paranoia, were, after all, close relatives of fear and panic, which lead to bad judgment calls and mistakes.

He flexed the muscles in his body systematically and assessed his condition. Aside from the healing injuries that were a throbbing echo in his joints and limbs, and a stiffness that permeated every muscle cell, he also felt drained. He wasn't sure if it was a lingering effect of the sedatives he'd been under or caused by something else, his extended bed rest, perhaps. He eyed the shunt in the back of his right hand where an IV could easily be attached and wondered just how many meals had been delivered from a plastic bag straight into his bloodstream.

His stomach growled and he glanced at Chakwas with a raised eyebrow.

Dr. Chakwas looked unimpressed as she retrieved a protein bar and handed it to him. "It you have any nausea or lightheadedness, let me know. I doubt you'll have any trouble keeping this down, though. "

He grunted as he bit into the bland bar and tried not to be insulted by her words. He wasn't like most humanity, and he didn't suffer from the same bouts of weakness other, less advanced people did. He wasn't surprised that she failed to grasp just how advanced he truly was. It was something he'd just come to expect.

He ate the bar quickly, perfunctorily, and then handed the wrapper back to the doctor. "I don't suppose you've got some triple-distilled vodka to wash that down with?" Her frown deepened and he shrugged. "No, I suppose not. So, what's next? Thumbscrews? Hot bamboo under the fingernails?"

The quarian chuckled and he tried to keep his muscles from tensing in his neck. "Much worse than that," she said, her eye lights smiling in a menacing fashion behind her face mask.

The marines around him attempted to suppress their smirks with varying degrees of success.

He tried to imagine what they would think was worthy of such sadistic glee.

Dr. Chakwas gave them all disapproving looks and shook her head. "Stand please."

He shifted his weight and slowly lowered his shackled feet over the side of the bed. His guards stepped back to give him enough room to stand. The floor was only slightly chilly under his bare feet, the tacky rubber membrane laid over the common walk areas flexed gently under his arches and between his toes. It wasn't an unpleasant sensation, but he'd rather have his boots back.

"Don't tell me! I get to walk the plank, right?" His condescension dripped from every syllable.

Chakwas ignored his words and waved him towards the door to the med bay. He moved slowly, but with purpose, doing his best to walk as though he weren't a prisoner of war, but like he owned the place. His eyes were moving everywhere, taking in every last detail. Unfortunately, he didn't get to see much. They walked him across to a hallway and through the last door on the left. It was obviously some kind of utility purposed room, probably life support, considering all the pipes and readout displays.

The marines walked him to a table and pointed him into the chair on the far side. He sat, noting that the good doctor was continuing to scan him with her omni-tool. Was she simply monitoring his health, or was there another reason for her continued attention?

One of the men stepped forward carefully and linked his cuffs to the table. He also activated a magnetic field on the table and then on the chair, locking him very efficiently in place. Once he was thus restrained, the rest of the guards holstered their pistols and stepped back. The one that had restrained him stood at attention next to him, his eyes never left Kai Leng.

Dr. Chakwas finished reading the results of her scan and then shut down her omni-tool. She looked pleased by whatever she read there. "The Commander will be with you momentarily. If there's anything you need in the meantime, feel free to let the ensign know." Then she turned and left. She took the rest of the guard with here.

Apparently, they thought he was sufficiently nullified to warrant only a single guard. Again, he tried not to feel insulted. He eyed the man watching him like a hawk and gave him a wink and a sly grin.

"That's right, sweetheart," the guard growled back, "if there's anything you need, you feel free to let me know, and I'll feel free to tell you to shut your fucking mouth."

"Charming," Kai Leng smirked and began testing the strength of his bonds. Slowly, without drawing attention, he flexed his legs and tried to pull his ankles away from the legs of his chair. No dice, he couldn't give the magnetic connections to budge.

A wave of exhaustion rippled up his thighs and he felt his smirk falter. That wasn't normal. He leaned back in his chair, scooting his butt forward and slouching. He used the extra distance to try and pull on his wrists, slowly, subtly putting pressure on his shackles. There was no give whatsoever. He glanced quickly at the marine guarding him and saw his cocky smirk widen. It was obvious the man knew what he was doing.

He dropped all pretenses and leaned back, pulling with all his strength against the strip of metal linking his wrists to the table. He felt the pull in his right shoulder and pain shot through his still sore left wrist. He ignored that and continued to pull, adding support from his legs, pushing against the floor. From the corner of his eye he saw the guard tense, but he made no other move.

Leng strained and pulled for more than a minute. Finally, just as he started to feel his shoulder sockets prepare to give, he relaxed and sank back into the chair. His wrists were now imprinted with red lines where the cuffs and dug into his skin.

He sagged further under a wave of dizziness that overwhelmed him suddenly. No, this wasn't normal at all. Obviously, they had done something more that drug him and shackle him. Somehow they had weakened him and neutralized his cybernetic enhancements.

That was bad, but it wasn't the end of the world. He hadn't had these upgrades very long, and he'd done just fine without them before. He knew it was just a matter of waiting and watching. He'd keep his eye open for opportunities for escape. In the meantime he would gather intel on Shepard and her ship and crew. He wasn't in an ideal situation, no, but he could make the most of it.

It sounded like Shepard would be interrogating him herself. He felt the tiniest thrill bubble up from his lower gut at the thought. He told himself it was that it was because he looked forward to seeing what she had to offer in way of a verbal and mental sparring partner. He'd seen her in action in the field and been moderately impressed, though she obviously didn't have what it took to beat him one on one. He looked forward to beating her at this, too.

When he relaxed, the wave of fatigue and light-headedness passed, as well. He settled himself comfortably and closed his eyes, pretending to doze, though he was acutely aware of every bit of input delivered to him from his other senses.

He could smell the slightest twinge of sweat and fear from the marine, overlying the faint ozone timbre of the heavily filtered air. The vibrations rising through the floor from the drive core where distinctly noticeable now that he was focused on them. They were something he recognized on an instinctual level whenever he was aboard a space faring vessel. They were faint now, suggesting they were moving on impulse speed only, perhaps even in orbit over some remote planet.

The silence was suddenly defined by a multitude of non-sounds, the flow of air in the sealed room, the hum of machinery all around him, the faint, indiscernible buzz of the magnets in his cuffs… the doors opening and closing at the other end of the room.

Kai's eyes flew open instantly and he watched intently as the illustrious Commander Shepard entered, sat, and dismissed the Ensign. He took in the tailored look of her BDU's, her feminine, but straight forward gait, her stone cold expression. Everything about her screamed cold, hard competence, but he knew that underneath it all she was ever so much more than that. He'd caught a glimpse of that fiery, explosive passion when he'd faced her on the citadel and again on Thessia, but he'd seen it before that. He'd seen hours of vid footage of Commander Shepard, everything from the media coverage of her interviews, to surveillance footage of her most famous conflicts, to classified Cerberus footage from her days on the slab and beyond, to her life in the ranks of Cerberus itself. He'd even watched the recording of her crew being taken by the collectors, and he'd seen her face when she returned to find her ship nearly empty, the people under her care stolen away.

He'd studied her technique in hand to hand, gotten to know her tells and knew that when her chest rose sharply and then held, she was about to shoot something dead. She was better than passable at martial arts and a dead shot marksman.

There was much to be admired about this woman.

The way she moved spoke of training, skill, and an unaffected grace that came from an efficiency of movement most people never managed to perfect. Her face usually bore that very expression, the blank, collected persona that declared her one of the career soldiers, a professional warrior and confident leader. Her eyes though… her eyes were truly the windows to her soul.

Ability wise, she was probably the closest thing he had to an equal. If only she wasn't a filthy traitor and alien sympathizer. He'd had hope for her when she'd worked with the Illusive Man to stop the Collectors that she had begun to see reason. After everything his boss and Cerberus had done for her! Couldn't she see how much she owed them, owed them because they had been the ones to recognize her value, her potential, and they had been the ones to bring her back. Cerberus had resurrected her from the dead so that she could fulfill her purpose and in the end, she had thrown it back in their face and gone running back to the Alliance, and for what!? So they could bury her under red tape and political bullshit until it was too late.

He pushed down his resentment and loathing and looked into her eyes now, memorizing the color of them, faded jade with specks of copper and bronze. She kept her gaze even and neutral flicking over him as if she was studying a battlefield to judge her best strategy.

When she began speaking, her first question surprised him. There was no concern in her voice, but the fact that she'd brought up his injuries first thing, as a reminder of how he'd been beaten, taken by her and her little crew, was quite masterful. She was making sure he knew how much power she had over him. He just knew he was going to enjoy this.

* * *

He most certainly wasn't enjoying himself. Things had started out well enough. Her directness, her posturing, the way she played "the game" was more than amusing. Then the bitch had gone and ruined everything. She had accused him, not just him, but all of Cerberus, of being under the Reaper's control. It was so ludicrous! He had thought her above lies and such pathetic attempts at manipulation. He supposed he had no one to blame for that but himself. He had known she was traitor and ultimately and coward who couldn't step beyond the Alliance's socially enslaving code of morals in order to make the tough calls and do what it would take to get the job done. She put on a good face, but she was really just a spineless, lizard-fucking whore.

Kai felt the rage threaten to burn away his sanity, as he struggled and yanked on his restraints. In a flash of clarity he suddenly realized how far gone he was. He'd lost himself, something he hadn't done in over fifteen years. He focused on the pain in his wrists and shoulders to bring him down just as exhaustion hit him, hard.

"What have you done to me," he gasped and nearly collapsed. His body felt tingly and detached, not numb, but something in the same neighborhood.

"I'm not going to give you details, obviously, but just know we've managed to successfully disrupt your cybernetic processes. The more you try to use them, the more they will drain your energy. You see, if I wanted you indoctrinated, I'd have done it while you were out and saved myself the trouble of these little chats. You should try and see that as a good sign I'm telling the truth." Her answer was so smug and self-congratulating he had to make a sizeable effort of will to keep from losing it again.

He had underestimated her ability to get under his skin. It was not a mistake he could afford to make again. He reached down into that hollow void in his chest and pulled that empty coldness up into the rest of him.

Kai Leng laughed with resentful relief and sagged against the table, leaning his weight onto his forearms on the cold metal surface of the table. "That will hardly convince me. From what I can tell you seem to be getting quite a kick out of this. Your file never mentioned you had a penchant for the sadistic."

Leng watched as Shepard's lip tried to slide into a sneer. "I usually don't, but for you, I'll make an exception."

"Don't I feel special," he whispered as he felt the last of his turbulent emotions blanketed under a thick layer of professional necessity. He was better than this. He forced himself to sit up and kept his back straight as he brought his breathing back to normal and relaxed the tension in his shoulders. Most of it, anyway. "I don't suppose I could convince you to give me a nice slow water boarding instead of making me your personal pet science project?"

"Sorry," she allowed a small smile to slip through and glanced down at the data pad she was still holding in her hand. She scrolled though some files until she found whatever it was she was looking for. Her face slipped back into that smooth, blank mask once again as she looked at whatever was before her.

"I have proof, but I don't suppose you would believe anything I could tell you," she had returned to her calm and reasonable voice as she said this and then looked up at him to judge his response.

"Sorry," he replied, mimicking her tone and smile exactly.

"Still, I'm curious to find out how you explain away this." Shepard flipped the data pad around and held it up for him to see. It was running a video file. It showed hundreds of people moving together in a long line, grouped together in small clusters that looked to be mostly made of families. There were small children and older people mixed in with the usual assortment of men and women of all sizes and ethnicity.

He watched as the people were funneled through a small area, filled with offices. People at desks were processing the people, taking personal belongings and communications devices and giving them papers in return before directing them through another set of doors. The video footage followed one family as they made their way into a large barracks looking facility and found their beds.

"These are war refugees that found their way to Sanctuary on Horizon," Shepard said, but she hardly needed to narrate for him. He'd know the location from the surrounding architecture, and made an educated guess as to what the file would show next.

Sure enough, the camera flashed to a new angle, showing the same family being escorted down a hallway and into a large laboratory. Another angle showed armed guards forcing the mother and father onto small platforms, and then lowing glass containment tubes down over them. The children were dragged away. The video had no sound, but their faces were very obviously twisted in screams of panic and terror.

The man beat against the glass as he watched his children, two young girls, maybe, five and eight, being taken away. The woman in the tube next to him crouched as low as she could in the confined space and wept, her hand on the glass reaching for her daughters. Before long the small chambers began filling with a blue gas, coating the mother and father. In a matter of moments they were transformed, their skin crawling with lights and twisting with cables and tubes, their flesh shriveled and blackened.

The view changed again, two little girls being dragged into a separate room, smaller with a large drain on the floor.

"The girls were used to increase an adrenal response in the adults, making the change faster and less hassle for the lab staff. Once they were of no more use they were discarded like garbage." The guards dropped the little girls onto the floor, stepped back, raised their pistols and fired one shot each. The two little girls crumpled like marionettes whose strings had been ruthlessly and efficiently severed. Two workers entered from a door on the opposite side of the room, dressed in bio hazard gear from head to toe and lifted the two bodies, carrying them to another room where they tossed them carelessly into a large furnace.

Kai Leng never let his face show any response. As the footage ended he stared at Shepard and beheld the slow simmering anger burning in her eyes.

"Sanctuary was owned and operated exclusively by Henry Lawson, not Cerberus," he said finally, shrugging slightly as though she just accused him of nothing more heinous then cheating at cards.

Her eyes flashed with murderous rage, but her face and voice remained impassive. "At the implicit request of the Illusive Man. He knew. He knew about everything that happened there. You can't seriously expect me to believe he didn't receive daily reports on exactly how many refugees were used in what ways every day. We both know he's much too meticulous to leave something this… critical to some lowly assistant or scientific consultant. He knew and he ordered it all done. Lawson was just a pawn, a shield that your boss used to keep the Reapers from getting wise to his little scheme. He was smart enough to know he needed to be careful. Smart enough to know that his own people were compromised, easy for the Reapers to manipulate."

"Now you're just guessing," he shook his head in disgust, looking away from her and her accusing gaze. It wasn't that he felt guilty. He hadn't known what was really going on there until the Illusive Man had sent him after the data, after the Reapers had attacked. He hadn't shot those two kids. He didn't kill innocents without a reason.

Besides, the information learned there had obviously been worth it, if the Reapers had perceived it of enough of a threat to send such a strong offensive against such an insignificantly small target. It was, after all, the very information that had provided her precious "cure" wasn't it?

_What a hypocrite_, he thought his eyes narrowing as he moved them back to her face.

"Guessing? Maybe, but it's a fairly educated guess. Have you forgotten that I spent quite a bit of time working closely with your demented boss? I got to know how he thinks, how he operates. I have to admit though," She said, placing the data pad back in her lap, "I didn't think he was capable of something this…" Shepard swallowed hard and shook her head. "I think this would have been beyond even his cold, calculating ethics, but I guess that was before the Reapers got into his head."

_This again_, Kai grumbled mentally and resisted the urge to pound his head against the table. "Maybe you hadn't noticed, but we are at war, fighting for our very survival. Some lives are going to have to be sacrificed for the greater good if we are going to survive. The reason you and the Alliance aren't going to be the ones that bring the Reapers down is because you don't have the stomach to make the hard calls. You aren't going to be able to get the job done. You just don't have the balls."

"I don't have the balls to murder hundreds of thousands of innocent human beings on the off chance that I _might_ learn something to use against the Reapers. You aren't wrong there. It used to be that not gambling with civilian lives was a good thing." She was boiling over with sarcasm.

"Unless their Batarian colonists, right, Commander?" Leng said, his verbal jab hitting its intended mark. Shepard actually flinched, though she tried to cover it up by closing her eyes and making it appear as though she was merely losing patience with an unruly child.

"Don't even try and equate what happened at Bahak to this…" Her voice had dropped to a quiet tone, barely above a whisper. To her credit, she never looked away from him.

Kai Leng smiled his coldest smile and raised his hands in defense. "Don't get me wrong, Commander. We at Cerberus fully endorse your decision to put the safety of everyone over the safety of a few hundred thousand colonists. We just wish you'd return the sentiment."

Shepard gave him her coldest glare.

"What about the Catalyst, then?" She shifted only slightly in her chair and folded her hands in her lap. It was a small motion, but he could tell she was uncomfortable and trying to change the subject.

"What about it?" he shrugged and shifted his weight as well. He realized then just how much he was hurting. Every muscle in his body felt like someone had run him through a cheese grater.

"Cerberus is holding information that could help complete the Crucible, the best chance we have of defeating the Reapers. Without that data our chances of winning this war decrease exponentially."

"Says who? A bunch of alien scientists and Alliance piss ants? Please, you'll excuse me if we aren't jumping at the chance to contribute to your "great collaboration".

"If you don't think it's going to work then hand the data over and prove us wrong," Shepard challenged nonchalantly.

"Like I said, I don't have it, and, as you know, I don't really call the shots. You should broach that idea with the Illusive Man, though. I'm sure that would go over really well, now that you've given him an eye for an eye. Tell you what, why don't you just send me in to negotiate for you. Better yet, just give me the coordinates for the Crucible. I'll take personal responsibility to make certain Cerberus will put it to good use."

"You'll understand if I tell you to go to hell," she frowned, at him and he watched as a strand of her dark blond hair fell across her forehead. Somehow this cool, collected woman had missed a lock of hair when she'd put up her ponytail. It delighted him, almost as much as her next words.

"I think I've heard enough."

The Commander gripped her data pad tightly and stood. She flicked her omni-tool open and entered a quick code. The door opened not ten seconds later and the Ensign from before, as well as Dr. Chakwas and, surprise, surprise, Major Kaidan Alenko walked into the room.

Shepard nodded coolly to the Major and addressed the doctor. "Have him escorted back to med bay. I want him to get a full night's sleep, only sedate him if he refuses to cooperate. We'll start things first thing tomorrow morning. I'll go over some data with Liara and EDI tonight so that everything's documented properly. Have Tali and Vega help you keep an eye on him tonight. I want a senior member with eyes on him at all times." She rapid fired orders with the ease of long practice.

"Understood, Commander," Dr. Chakwas nodded and motioned for the Ensign to unshackle Kai Leng from the table.

The Major motioned into the hallway and had four other marines move in to assist with the transfer. Then he turned to the Commander, who was waiting for the marines to enter before making her exit.

"He give you any trouble?" Alenko asked with a small nod in Leng's direction.

"I told you," Shepard smiled softly, "nothing I can't handle. He threw a big enough tantrum earlier, I'm sure he's wiped himself completely out. He probably won't be giving anyone trouble for a while." She glanced back and made sure he'd caught her dig at him. He just stared at his wrists as they were released from the table and the magnetic fields deactivated. He didn't want to give the stupid bitch the satisfaction. Besides, part of him was starting to worry that she might be right. He had to get off this ship, and soon.

**AN: As always, please, please, please, feel free to drop me a review and let me know what you're thinking of the fic so far. Specifically, I want to know what you think of Kai Leng and if there are any particular tortures you would like to see him undergo. All in the name of science, you understand… ;)**


	8. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: Every year for Christmas I ask Santa for all the things I want. He never delivers. I still don't own Bioware or any of its awesome games, including Mass Effect. Maybe this year…**

Chapter 7

Shepard walked straight from Life Support, into the elevator and pressed the button for her quarters. She needed a moment of quiet before she called Liara and EDI up for a consultation. She watched the elevator doors close and then visibly sagged. Her head went back and she leaned against the back wall, her eyes closed and her throat tight.

Though she hadn't been in his presence long, all things considered, Raina felt completely exhausted by the exchange. When she'd turned herself into the Alliance after defeating the Collector base, she'd had a lot of time to think about what had happened in the Bahak system, too much time as it turned out. She'd nearly driven herself insane wondering if she'd really exhausted every option. Maybe if she'd caught on sooner to Dr. Kenson's indoctrination she could have avoided spending all that time unconscious. She would have had time to evacuate the colony.

Her head filled with maybe's and would have's and she felt that familiar, desperate agitation, that resided in whatever part of her brain controlled her guilt, swell and threaten to overrun her reason. Her logic and reason told her she'd done the right thing, that ultimately she'd saved billions of lives. As far as her "cold calculus" was concerned she had no reason to feel guilty. Yet, it tortured her. Of course, it did. That was what separated her from those people at Cerberus who felt entitled to play god with people's lives.

Leng had compared what she had done to the actions of the Illusive man and Henry Lawson on Horizon. She just couldn't accept that they even remotely resembled each other. There was an indiscernible line in her mind that kept what she did on the side of acceptable and what they had done on the other side of that line. Was that just rationalization speaking? Was she arrogant and self-righteous to believe her actions were any less despicable just because she'd been put into an impossible situation, and had to react with a clock ticking in her face.

She had to believe she'd done the best she could with what she'd been given. She couldn't have stood by while the reapers flooded in through the Alpha relay when she had the power to stop it.

She didn't really feel like she'd gained anything but a headache from her exchange with Kai Leng. Except maybe an intensified need to smash his face into something hard. She had wanted to hurt him, badly, when he'd compared her to Cerberus. She still wanted to hurt him.

That was precisely why she hadn't touched him. She'd had more she wanted to ask him about, a whole list of questions Liara had helped her compile waited, unasked, on her data pad. She knew that once she got started punishing Leng, she wouldn't be able to stop. The rage and need to cause him pain frightened her. She needed to find a way to let off some steam.

Vega wouldn't be due in the med bay for a while. If he wasn't sleeping, maybe she could get him to spar with her after she met with Liara and EDI. She flipped open her omni-tool and typed him a quick message, then she sent one to Liara asking her up to her quarters in twenty minutes.

The doors to the elevator opened and she strode into her chambers with purpose. Work would keep her busy and keep her sane. It was what had gotten her past her guilt-ridden depression during her incarceration. It would just have to be the thing that got her through now, as well. It wasn't as if she didn't have enough of it to distract her.

As soon as she was seated at her terminal she received two messages, one right after the other. The first one was from James, telling her he'd be delighted to spar with her in their usual spot anytime before 0100 when he had to take his shift "babysitting that Cerberus Pendejo" in the med bay. She felt a smile touch her lips and she replied she'd be down in an hour or two.

The second message was from Kaidan.

Her smile turned contemplative as she read it.

_Hey, Shepard,_

_I just wanted to make sure you were really okay. You looked a little stressed and you took off pretty quick. Don't worry; I'm sure no one else noticed. I know how you like to keep up a tough exterior for everyone, but I just wanted to let you know that if you need someone to talk to, I'm here for you. If you need me, you know where to find me._

_Kaidan_

Shepard didn't know how to feel. Part of her was irritated that he'd noticed how stressed she'd been. Part of her was comforted by his concern. Mostly, she was just uncomfortable with the idea that he wanted things to go back to how they'd been before, especially when it was Kaidan who had been the one to point out just how much she'd changed since she died.

The truth was, as much as she wanted to deny it, she had changed. Whether that was because Cerberus had screwed up some part of her resurrection, not rewiring her brain the way it had been before, maybe getting some crucial chemical mixture wrong, or whether it was just the result of her dealing with being gone for two years to come back and fine her allies had abandoned her and her enemies had been the ones to bring her back… Coming back from the dead alone was enough to mess with a person's head.

Whatever the reason, they were both different people then they had been. Shepard wasn't sure if the person she was now and the person Kaidan had become would work together, especially with their past between them.

She still cared deeply for him, maybe even still loved him. He was all the best things she valued in humanity, strong, capable, compassionate, and so full of integrity that it made her want to weep with pride. That was exactly why she couldn't go to him with her problems now.

If she tried to explain to him what she was going through because of Kai Leng and all that he'd brought up with the Alpha Relay incident with would only serve to remind him of her past with Cerberus. If she told him what had happened on Horizon, and about Miranda… she was sure it would only destroy what trust and respect they'd managed to build between them the last couple of months. He would never be able to understand what she was feeling. It was better for both of them if she kept him at arm's length.

Raina closed the message from Kaidan and then noticed another message, one she had first read over a week ago. She had kept it in her inbox as a reminder, and as a motivation for her to find and catch Leng, and for her to find a way to stop Cerberus.

The words Evacuating Thessia reached down, through her eyeballs and wrapped their red-hot fingers around her heart. She didn't even have to open the contents and read the words written there for the rage and need to hurt someone to come bubbling to the surface. She focused that feeling and let it solidify her determination. She would break that son of a bitch.

If there was anyone more arrogant and self-conceited than she was, it was Kai Leng. She needed to get into his head, and under his skin. She needed to figure out how to bring him to his knees and make him beg for mercy, she needed…

Shepard took some deep breaths and unclenched her fist. She needed to chill out and relax. She was going to have an aneurism, and then where would the galaxy be. She shook her head with rueful, bitter amusement and leaned her head back and closed her eyes. She needed to be thinking happy thoughts.

She tried meditating herself into a more peaceful mindset, and a few minutes later, when Liara rang for entrance, she had mostly managed to succeed.

"Enter," she said, her voice even, her face relaxed.

Liara T'Soni walked through the door, working on something on her omni-tool as she walked. "You wanted to see me, Shepard?"

"Yes, Liara, come in. I know you're busy, but I just had a couple of things I wanted to go over. EDI?"

"Yes, Commander?" EDI's voice came from the overhead speakers.

"I would like you're input, as well." Shepard stood, taking her data pad, and walked down the stairs to the couches below where she motioned for Liara to sit.

"Would you like me to be present in my mobile platform?" EDI asked.

"Up to you," Shepard said, "I know we're all busy, and since you have the advantage of being in more than one place at a time, I won't pull you away, if I don't have to."

"Yes," Liara added, "I wish I had that advantage."

Shepard smiled and nodded to her asari friend. "I'll try not to keep you. We'll make this quick."

"In that case, I will leave my mobile platform on the bridge with Joker. He and I are having a rather educational discussion about the many ways in which he wishes to inflict pain on certain persons, and the means by which to inflict the maximum amount of pain with the least amount of bodily damage. This was segued by our debate on the pros and cons of inflicting mental and emotional torment, verses physical torture. Joker favors a more hand on approach."

Shepard chuckled and gave Liara a wink. "I'm sure he's not the only one. That's why I'm keeping Leng on lock down in the med bay for now. It's more for his safety than ours."

"I believed this was because the brig space allotted in the original Normandy design was reallocated by Cerberus for a second shuttle in the SR-2." EDI replied mechanically.

"That's just what Cerberus wants you to believe, EDI. I'm fairly certain that was just one more way the Illusive man foresaw that he could give me a hard time," Shepard drawled.

Liara nodded, mock sagely.

"I see. I shall have to run a security scan to see if I missed any other imbedded belief protocols that Cerberus might have implanted into my code," EDI responded with self-derision. Shepard was pretty sure she was kidding.

"They are some pretty sneaky bastards," Shepard nodded.

Then both women broke into grins. Well, Shepard grinned. Liara just gave the same tranquil, radiant smile that she always did. It seemed grinning like an idiot was too undignified for the graceful asari.

Shepard didn't care. It felt good.

"Okay," Shepard said after another beat, "speaking of sneaky bastards…"

"Right," Liara's smile faded as well. "How did your interview with our guest go?"

"Frustrating, to say the least, but I think I managed to get a fairly telling reaction. Kai Leng seems like the kind of guy who can keep it together under pressure, I mean, he'd have to be, right? When I mentioned the cure through, he totally lost it. I have to think that's part of the indoctrination's influence. He nearly pulled his arms out of the socket trying to get out of his restraints. Do you think it's plausible that the reapers will try and stop us from breaking him out of their influence?"

"Of course it's possible," Liara said hesitantly, "it all depends on how much attention they have on him. His reaction could have been part of a preprogramed response, but they may also have eyes and ears on everyone that is under their influence. I just don't understand enough about the process to comment."

"EDI?"

"From what I have analyzed from the Sanctuary data, and from what you've told me about Saren's research on Virmire, I conclude that the level of influence the reaper's have over the Illusive Man and his top operatives is minimal. Placing sentient organisms under their indoctrination causes severe cognitive impairment. Seeing as how Cerberus is still acting in a fashion that indicates careful planning and in-depth strategizing, I feel it is safe to assume the majority of their cognitive capabilities are intact."

"That seems to make sense," Liara agreed. "If the reapers wanted to influence a faction to try and work for controlling the reapers instead of destroy them then they couldn't impair them to the point that they are mindless husks. They would have to use a much more subtle form of persuasion. They found a group that already strove for technological advancement on behalf of their species, and, instead of assuming direct control of the organization, they use something closer to subliminal suggestion on the higher ups and let them lead the group down the path the reapers want them to go."

"If that's the case, it's less likely they have a direct link to Leng's mind." Shepard surmised.

"Correct. However, this is all just conjecture based on available information." EDI wasn't fond of guessing or make assumptions, the Commander knew.

"For now, we'll hope for the best and plan for the worst. I have Chakwas, Tali and Vega keeping an eye on him overnight. I'll make sure and give them the heads up to be extra careful and I'll have Karin monitor his brain waves for any suspicious activity while he's unconscious. Do you have any other suggestions, EDI?"

"I have readied biotic barrier defenses in the med bay and surrounding areas, and will also be monitoring the prisoner's vitals for unusual activity."

"Thank you, EDI," Shepard flipped mentally through a list of ship's defenses and resources for other possible options. Hackett had been right when he'd said the Normandy was not the best place for holding a high priority POW. "EDI, I want you to see if there are any facilities we can commandeer for the time being. Something remote, abandoned, preferably ex-military, preferably close to our current location where we can set up a ground side base. Off the books, of course."

"Of course, Commander. Is there anything else you need me for at the moment?" EDI's voice contained that very subtle amused undertone that made Shepard equal parts delighted and nervous. "Cataloging Joker's extensive collection of torture devices is consuming more of my memory than previously projected."

Shepard nodded and suppressed another grin into submission. "Fair enough, just keep me posted on any changes in our guest's vitals and let me know as soon as you have a viable possibilities for us to go groundside."

"Yes, Commander."

EDI's "presence" diminished, but Shepard knew all she had to do was say her name and she would be back in an instant.

She turned her focus on Liara and opened the notes on Kai Leng on her data pad. "I have a couple of favors to ask, Liara," she said, all business now.

"Of course, Shepard, anything," the asari said fervently.

"First of all, I was hoping you could use your resources to help EDI locate somewhere better for holding Leng. I know EDI will find something if there's something in the Normandy's database, but I know you have access to a number of other data pools."

Liara entered a quick command into her omni-tool and nodded. "I'll have Glyph start compiling a list of possibilities right away. What else?" she asked when she'd finished that.

Shepard handed her data pad over to the Shadow Broker. Then stood and started pacing back and forth on the other side of her coffee table. "This is all the information the alliance has on Kai Leng. It isn't much. We know next to nothing about him before he enlisted and after he was rescued from an Alliance prison camp by Cerberus." She waved helplessly at the words on the pad. "I need to know more. If I'm going to be able to get this guy to talk I'm going to have to know everything about him, where he was born, if he has any family, what his favorite breakfast cereal is, everything. I have to understand my enemy in order to know his weaknesses and how to defeat him."

Liara gave Shepard a careful look as she eyed the Commander's fervent expression and heard the desperation in her voice. If she didn't know any better she'd almost say there was a fanatic gleam in her eye.

"I'll see what I can find out," she said careful to keep her voice neutral. "Is there anything else?"

"Yes, I'm making you the official liaison with Hackett and the Crucible team. Until we figure out what the Catalyst is they'll have some time to work on the Sanctuary data. I want you to coordinate with them, all the data we collect on our guest and how things go with the cure. If they come up with any improvements, I want to know. When we have confirmation that it's either failed or succeeded, I want Hackett kept informed. I don't mind if you delegate some of the communications to Specialist Traynor, or one of the Yeomen, but I want your eyes on this, overseeing everything. You'll have a better sense than most people about what's really important."

Liara nodded again, "Very well."

"You can coordinate with Dr. Chakwas for any and all medical scans and biological information," the Commander continued. "Also, you might talk to Javik, see if he knows anything about the prothean means of identifying indoctrinated and if they had any knowledge of a cure in their time. If there's any chance this so called cure is another reaper hoax I want to know about it yesterday." She paused to consider whether she was missing anything.

Turning to face Liara, Shepard noticed the asari's strange, concerned expression. She stopped pacing and, instead, rushed forwards with words.

"I know this is a lot to put on your shoulders, Liara, but this is important, and I trust that your experience dealing with mass quantities of information and raw data make you the ideal candidate for this job."

"That isn't what I'm worried about," Liara responded with a sad, sweet smile.

"Oh?" The Commander quirked one eye brow and crossed her arms over her chest. She waited patiently while Liara gathered her thoughts.

"I'm worried about you, Shepard. We all are. We all know how affected you were by Thessia," she began with strain obvious in her own voice.

Shepard gave a bitter laugh. "Coming from you, Liara, that's like comparing getting a sliver to having your arm amputated. I'm the one that should be comforting you, not the other way around."

Liara shook her head and her smile shifted into the wry spectrum. "I know that, and you did comfort me. That's the thing. You're there for every member of this crew. Our troubles are your troubles. You take on some much, but you don't let any of us return the favor." Liara stood and walked around to her friend, setting the data pad on the coffee table before placing one hand on Shepard's forearm.

"You didn't used to be that way. You used to let us in, me, Kaidan, Garrus even Ashley before…" Liara faltered realizing she was going about this all wrong. She wasn't trying to accuse the Commander. "After Horizon, especially, you seemed to shut down emotionally. We've all noticed. You've been sort of consumed with this indoctrination thing, true, but this is different than you being busy. You've been busy before without being so… guarded."

Shepard looked away, feeling uncomfortable with the emotional confrontation. She wanted to indulge her irritation at Liara's butting into her private life, but she knew there was too much truth in her words to ignore.

"I know, Liara, I'm trying…" She started to speak, but Liara held up a hand a silenced her.

"I don't want to overstep my bounds, and I'm not saying I should be the one you talk to. I know how strong you are. I know if you have some things to work through, you'll do it in your own time. I just want you to know that any member of this crew would gladly do anything in their power to help you. We're here for you. I just don't want you to forget that you aren't alone in this."

Shepard managed to keep her tough face on, but felt her throat tighten regardless. It took a minute before she managed to swallow down her emotional response.

"Thanks, Liara, maybe I do need to be reminded of that from time to time." She looked back into her friend's eyes and nodded.

"And it might not hurt if you had someone to share with, your thoughts and feelings," there was a wicked gleam in the asari's eyes, "your bed. You're so tense! You could use some nice stress relief."

Shepard snorted and pinched the bridge of her nose. "I gave Garrus some similar advice." She shook her head and turned away. "I just don't have time to… mess with all that stuff." She waved her hand in dismissal as she walked up the stairs to her desk.

"Please, Shepard," Liara scoffed skeptically. "Any of the men on the ship, and even some of the women would jump into your bed if you so much as crooked your finger in their direction. I know for a fact there's a love smitten Major down in the Starboard Observation who has been pinning for your attentions since he came on board."

Shepard took a deep breath, and let it puff up her cheeks as she let it out slow. "I can't," she groaned and leaned over her desk. "There's just too much there."

"Fine, you still have your pick of a dozen other marines and officers."

"I'm not going to just crook my finger, Liara. I don't work that way, especially with my crew, and, before you say anything, Kaidan was the exception that proved the rule."

The Shadow Broker looked like she wanted to say something about that, but held her tongue. She did give her Commander a pointed look, however.

"I'll think about it," Shepard conceded, wanting this conversation to be over.

"I hope so," Liara eyed her up and down looking for any signs of deception.

"No promises," Shepard added, knowing that, despite her usually reserved manner, when Liara set her sights on a goal there was no distracting her.

"Very well, Commander. I'll get started on these things. Was there anything else you needed me to work on?"

"That will be all for now." Shepard dismissed Liara with a nod and turned to sit before her console. She heard the asari leave as she typed up a message to Dr. Chakwas about being on alert against reaper interference.

That done she scanned the daily ship reports for things like weapons inventory, medical supplies, food stuffs, and clothing. Her eyes moved on auto pilot as she looked things over, but, seeing nothing that needed her immediate attention she logged off and leaned back.

She rolled her shoulders and felt the tension there as she did. Liara was probably right, but Shepard just didn't think making her sex life a priority just now was anything but madness. Besides, there were other ways to blow off steam. She glanced at her clock and realized she had an appointment in the cargo hold to do just that.

She changed quickly into Alliance issue sweat pants and an N7 tank top and sports bra and made her way to the elevator. She felt a thrill of anticipation as she pushed the button for deck 5. She really needed to punch someone.

* * *

James threw a right hook at Shepard's left ear. She twisted away and brought her right leg around in a reverse roundhouse that caught James in the ribs. He grunted and reached down, trying to catch her ankle, but she was inhumanly fast. She followed through on her momentum and smashed her left fist into his now exposed face.

Vega stumbled backwards, momentarily stunned and Shepard gave him half a moment to recover before stepping forward and taking a jab as his chin. He knocked it away with some effort and forced himself to focus through the pain throbbing in his jaw and his ribs, and his thigh and his kidneys. The Commander usually pulled her punches a little more. Apparently, she was still mad at him for Horizon. He was healed from his concussion, but he'd still expected her to go easy on him. He shouldn't have, he knew. It was just that she was Commander Shepard, a cyberneticlly enhanced galactic legend with superhuman strength and reflexes. She outclassed him in more ways than he could count, despite the fact that he had half a foot and a hundred and fifty pounds on her.

He wondered if she wanted him to really fight back, or if she just needed a punching back. Since scuttlebutt had said Leng had come out of their interview in one piece, relatively unscathed, he was fairly certain it was the latter.

He was breathing hard as he leaned back from another jab and swung for her with another right hook. She swept his arm aside and snapped an elbow up to hit him in the cheek, leaving a small scrap. He managed to get a glancing blow to her ribs under her strike, but she was moving away before he could make it more solid.

"What's the matter, Vega? You skip dinner or something?" she mocked as she danced back, leaping lightly from foot to foot. "Maybe I'm keeping you up past your bedtime? You just let me know if you want to stop so you can get your beauty rest, princess." Her expression was flirting with the idea of becoming a sadistic sneer.

Vega growled. If it was a fight she wanted, it was a fight she'd get, but he was done playing to her strengths. A real marine knew how to size up an enemy and knew how to make the most of their advantages, which was precisely what she'd done.

Shepard was using her speed to dance around him and her strength to land well placed, staggering blows that would leave him weakened.

Vega knew if he was going to do anything but be the Commander's punching bag he would have to press his size and mass, as well as his ability to take a hit.

Vega waited until she danced back in for another strike, taking an outside kick to the left hip, then he barreled into her. He lowered his head and hunched his back so that his shoulder rammed into her center of mass and they tumbled backwards.

Shepard's head snapped back and hit the mat with a thud. Vega straddled her thighs, effectively pinning her legs down, and slid his right forearm up under her chin, forcing her to turn her head away. He then proceeded to pummel her ribs with his left fist. She did her best to block with her right arm, while blindly swinging at his right side with her left fist.

Vega lowered himself in tight making it hard for her to get the momentum she needed to make the strikes hurt. He pressed all of his weight down onto her and leaned into his arm, cutting off her air supply.

"Tap out," he growled in her ear. She would have shaken her head no if she could have moved. She brought her left forearm between them and pressed it back into his neck pushing away with all her might. Superhuman strength or not, she just didn't have the leverage she needed to push him back off her.

Her mouth twisted into a feral grin at the challenge.

_This is more like it._ She rotated her left wrist and wrapped her palm around Vega's neck. Using her fingers, she jabbed brutally at the soft spot behind his ear, at the same time that she used her right arm to push against the mat and twisted her hips to the left.

The tender pressure point sent a jolt of agony across James' jaw and into his neck and he found himself leaning away from the pain.

_She's playing dirty!_ He gasped as he found himself on his back, with Shepard straddling his left thigh, her knee uncomfortably close to his groin as she leaned down and pressed her own forearm against his neck.

He rapidly slid his right arm up into the crook of her left elbow and dragged her away from his neck. With her momentum pulling to the left, he rolled them back, pinning her left arm against the mat. She used her right to land a couple quick hook shots to his mouth, splitting his lip in the process. He scrabbled with her briefly, his left arm working to get a good hold on her wrist.

It took him a moment. She was fighting like a wildcat against him, even managing to scape her nails along the inside of his forearm before he got her pinned. He chuckled at her attempt to knee him, as he straddled her left thigh, but he'd seen it coming and pressed his weight down to stop her jerky movement.

"Dios mio," he grunted as she thrashed beneath him. She tried to head-butt him, but he'd anticipated that and leaned back, out of her reach. "You ready to call it a draw, Lola," he grinned triumphantly.

Shepard tried bucking her hips a couple more times, but couldn't dislodge him. Pinned as she was she just had no way to push him off her, and they both knew it.

Shepard was panting now, too, her face pressed back into that blank mask she used when her thoughts needed to be hidden. All indication of her animalistic wrath had been banished. Maybe it was just because of her conversation with Liara not an hour before, but Shepard found herself very aware of all the places Vega was touching her, which was most everywhere. She briefly considered the strong cut of his jaw, his full lips that were still bleeding slightly from her hits, and his heaving chest, broad and hard-muscled above her.

He wasn't unattractive, with his scared check and lip, his eyes, a flaming hazel that was darker and richer then her own were locked onto hers and she contemplated asking if the Lieutenant wouldn't mind taking this upstairs.

Something of her thoughts must have shown in her eyes because, in a flash, Vega was pushing off of her and leaping to his feet.

"Now that's just plain cruel, Commander," he said, a little breathless. "Didn't think you were the type to use her feminine wiles on a poor, helpless Lieutenant, just to win a sparring match," he chuckled and shook his head, wiping the blood from his lip and cheek onto the back of one hand.

"Hardly helpless," she said, sitting up and fingering her ribs. She didn't think any were broken, but she'd definitely be sore for a day or three. He reached out a hand and she let him pull her to her feet. She made no move to step away from him, testing his reaction. He stood there, with her almost touching him for almost three seconds before he cleared his throat and stepped a respectful distance away.

_So much for Liara's theory_, Shepard thought as she smiled wryly and began pulling the tape off her hands.

"Thanks for the workout, Lieutenant. You should probably get a few hours shut eye before you're on babysitting duty." She turned and walked towards the elevator, as she moved to the other hand, unwinding the tape there with practiced ease. The creamy white was spotted with drops of scarlet. She winced and criticized herself inwardly, both for beating the shit out of her Armory Chief and for considering, even more a moment, of pressing him into something sexual. It was fairly clear to her that he worshiped her as a commanding officer and was completely intimidated by her as a woman. Despite his nearly incessant, casual flirting, he meant nothing by it, and although he would probably oblige her, if she pressed the issue, she knew that would be pressing the boundaries of abusing her authority. That was one of the many reasons for fraternization regs, and it was one she agreed with wholeheartedly.

It was a very reasonable and logical thing that she did, walking way. Of course, try telling that to her long neglected sex drive. The tight clenching twist low in her gut didn't care that Vega was a subordinate. It just cared that he was male and that he had been pressed against her, dominating her.

She ground her teeth together as the elevator began moving up. She'd needed to blow off steam. It seemed like she'd just traded one kind of frustration for another.

"Damn you, Liara," she hissed as she stepped out of her elevator.

She needed a shower and her bed. A cold shower. And an empty bed.

**AN: So this was sort of a long chapter. Long and chatty. Hopefully, it moves the story from point a to point b in a coherent manner so that the next chapter we can get back to the really fun stuff. Not that sexually frustrated Shepard isn't fun… ;) I also apologize for all the groans I heard at the cereal reference. I tried to resist it, really I did, but well… I'm weak.**

**Thoughts, questions, concerns? Let me hear from you!**


	9. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: I don't own Mass Effect, I just use its characters, plots, etc. for my own nefarious purposes. **

Chapter 8

Kai Leng's awareness swam in and out of a swarm of hazy pixels that shifted and swayed around him in random patterns that made his mind stretch in on itself. He worked at focusing his attention, trying to pick out a shape, any shape that made sense. The harder he tried, the faster the confusion seemed to move around him. He tried a new approach, not focusing on one single thing, trying to see through the confusing mist, relaxing his eyes, to take in everything, yet nothing.

This seemed to be the signal for the pixels to collate through the smeared grayscale into recognizable shapes and outlines. He was standing on the edge of a lake, the sharp line of the water curving away behind the tree lined shore.

The waterline where he stood was murky with soggy green growth and dancing reeds. His legs were sunk to mid-shin in cold mud that froze his feet, sending dull waves of numbness up over his knees and thighs.

Kai attempted to lift his feet and pull free of the sucking mud. Waves of quavering weakness threatened to topple him face first into the water and weeds before him. He ceased his attempts immediately and steadied himself, regaining his balance quickly.

He looked around, trying to find a sturdy branch or maybe another person to assist him. He was completely alone. The light around him dimmed suddenly, as if the sun had just moved behind the line of the mountains to the west. Glancing to his right to find the fading source of light he was stunned to see the arching lines of silvery light pulsing up from where the sun would be.

He attempted to command his visual implants to shift to infrared, but realized half a second later that he was missing his face mask. He glanced down and noticed his arms and hands were bare as well.

He felt his jaw clenched as he started to recall why that was.

"Shepard," he growled under his breath and narrowed his eyes, further dimming the light from the strange, pale aurora borealis like lines that wavered in the sky, radiating from behind the sharp peak of the mountain there.

As if speaking her name had summoned her, Leng watched, somewhat stunned, as the woman rose from the water, her hair and face becoming visible first as she walked towards him, then her shoulders. She continued towards him, slowly, her face her usual careful neutral as she approached.

He considered reaching for his ninjato blade, but figured that had been removed, as well.

He kept his back straight and his chin up. When Commander Raina Shepard stood no more than 6 inches from him, she stopped. Her eyes were intense and filled with something Leng couldn't place. They seemed to dance with colorless flame as they reflected the silvery light.

Kai Leng stood, body tensed, ready to react, but she just stood there, looking into his eyes and waiting, for what he wasn't sure.

After a few minutes, the tension in his body made his muscles ache all over and he was forced to relax before he started shaking violently. He refused to speak first, or look away first. They stood there with their eyes locked and their wills clashing.

Ever so slowly, the corner of Shepard's mouth began to slide upward on one side.

"You're never going to beat me, Leng." Her voice brushed across him like the sighing of wind chimes in a light breeze.

He raised the corner of his own lips in a smirk to match hers. "I already have. You already forget about that?"

Her smirk rose higher. "Oh, Kai, Kai, Kai," she said his name like a slow caress, and each time she said it her voice became softer and sweeter. "We both know that's not entirely true."

His smirked slipped a touch as he felt a touch of doubt and confusion.

"That's right," she sighed and her eyes shone with triumph. "We both know I'm better than you. Your boss knows it, too. You're just a sad disappointment that never lived up to his expectations."

Kai tensed and tried to reach out and one fist and wrap around her slender, feminine neck. He could snap it easily, he knew. She caught his right fist in her own and started to squeeze, causing the bones there to grind. The pain jolted down his wrist and seemed to paralyze him, making him lean backwards precariously.

Shepard held her smirk as she reached out her other hand and slid it around the back of his neck. Her fingers played with his hair lightly as she continued to grind the bones in his right hand. He managed to raise his left hand, though it seemed to take a tremendous effort and caught a hold of the wrist that rested on his left shoulder.

The Alliance Commander's chuckle raised the hairs on the back of his everything and made the blood in his veins boil. "So weak," she laughed and pulled him closer, slowly, his body straining to resist but not responding to his mental commands.

"I will break you," she whispered when his face was only inches from his. "I will make you mine," she eyed his lips as she licked her own.

"Bitch," he said, with heat in his voice. He thought it was less angry sounding then he had intended, and more something else.

"You wouldn't have it any other way," she leaned into him and pressed her lips against his, forceful and demanding, and his traitor of a body responded.

* * *

"Commander?" EDI's voice was sudden, but hushed in the still air of the dark Captain's cabin. Shepard was awake instantly, alert and sitting up in bed.

"Yes, EDI, what is it?" she asked even as she was moving, climbing from bed and moving to her armor locker.

"I have detected a prolonged increase in heart rate in Kai Leng. He appears to be experiencing REM sleep, which is likely the cause and of no concern, but you asked to be informed."

Raina paused. "Has he moved?"

"No, Shepard," was EDI's relaxed reply.

Realizing there was no immediate threat, Shepard glanced at the clock. She'd been asleep for almost 5 hours. That was nearly a record. "James is with him now?" she queried, fingering her BDU's as she did.

"Yes, although I feel inclined to inform you that there may be a situation in the port side observation deck, as well. Since you're up anyway, maybe it would be worth looking into it," EDI said vaguely, a sly amusement in her tone.

Shepard frowned suspiciously; knowing this was probably the real reason EDI had woken her up. "What is it," she asked through clenched teeth knowing she wouldn't be getting anymore sleep now.

"Tali went in there right after Lieutenant Vega relieved her from duty in the med bay," EDI began and Shepard interrupted her, pausing as she pulled off the t-shirt she'd been sleeping in.

"Wait, Tali?" That was not what she'd been expecting. "What's wrong with Tali?"

She continued dressing as EDI explained casually.

"As I was saying, as soon as she was off duty, the quarian went into the port obs deck and began imbibing spirits. She is now quite drunk and, judging from her enviro-suit readings is quite…distraught."

Shepard's frown deepened as she sat on her bed to pull on her socks and boots.

"She's drunk?" Shepard nearly choked. She didn't think quarians could get drunk.

"Exceptionally," EDI replied with amusement.

Shepard put her face in her hands and rubbed the last of the sleep away. There was no way she was feeling up to dealing with a drunk quarian, especially this early in the morning. She liked the young Admiral, true enough, be she wasn't sure they were close enough to warrant her having to deal with this kind of situation. She had enough on her plate already.

"Is Liara awake, yet?" Shepard asked as she stood and walked into the bathroom.

"Yes, Shepard. We also have the short list of possible locations, matching your parameters ready when you want them."

Shepard considered her priorities and her to-do-list as she brushed her teeth. When she was finished rinsing she applied a quick bush to her hair as well, pulling it into her normal ponytail as he doled out her instructions.

"Send the list to the CIC, I'll take a look at the list on the galaxy map as soon as I get down. Ask Liara to meet me there as soon as she can. Keep me informed on Kai Leng. If he so much as twitches in his sleep, I want to know."

Her hygiene routine run she walked to the elevator, straightening her uniform and sharping any sloppy folds or wrinkles.

"And Tali," EDI asked, reminding Shepard of the other issue.

Shepard rolled her eyes slightly and pressed the button for deck 2. "Call Major Alenko and see if he'll look into it. He's been looking for ways to help out." She gave a small smile as the elevator doors closed.

* * *

"Major Alenko?" the disembodied voice of the AI startled Kaidan as he sat on the edge of his bunk.

"Yeah?" His voice quavered with uncertainly, he was barely awake, and still uneasy around the Cerberus created ship's AI. Dealing with Cerberus tech, and an AI at that was enough to make anyone nervous, but this particular entity also walked around in a body that had put him in the hospital not too long ago.

"Commander Shepard would like your assistance with a small matter," EDI said lightly, aware of the Major's discomfort where she was concerned.

Kaidan sat upright at the mention of Shepard's name and reminded himself that if Shepard trusted the ship, er… the AI… er… EDI that he could trust it, er… her, too. He was also excited to hear Shepard had asked for his help with something. "What is it?" he said standing up running his hands through his hair, trying to wake himself up.

"Shepard is concerned about Tali'Zorah vas Normandy and requests that you check on her, since the Commander is too occupied at the moment to do so herself."

Kaidan paused, his hands in his hair. "Wait, what's wrong with Tali?"

"She is currently in the port side observation deck and is quite intoxicated."

Kaidan had to replay the word in his head several time to make sure he heard right. "Tali's drunk?" He still wasn't sure that's what EDI had said. "I didn't know quarians could get drunk." Kaidan looked around for his uniform. "She's okay, though right? She's not gonna make herself sick or anything is she?"

"I believe the concern is more for her emotional state then her physical one, although eventually the first one will begin to affect the other if she continues as she has been." EDI's voice held a tone of both impatience and concern. Kaidan figured he was just reading into it. He finished dressing quickly and left for the port obs deck.

Alenko entered quietly and walked up behind Tali. She was sitting at the bar against the rear wall and he could see that she was tilting a bit unsteadily on the stool.

"Hey, Tali," he said quietly as he walked around to her left and around the bar. "How's it going?"

"Kaidan!" Tali exclaimed happily. "Want a drink?" She leaned heavily on the bar and lifted her glass over her head. "I'm toasting Miranda." She lowered the glass and leaned a bit to the right. "I think."

"How does that work, exactly," he said waving at her glass. "I mean, how are you getting drunk?"

"Very carefully," she replied, slurring only a little. "Turian brandy, triple-filtered, then introduced into the suit through an emergency induction port."

Kaidan frowned, "You mean that straw?"

"Emergency induction port," she said very carefully. "It's actually getting a little harder to get it into the slot." A pause. "I think that means its working."

Kaidan nodded solemnly and moved the bottle in front of her back to the shelf.

"What's all this about Miranda? That's Miranda Lawson, right?"

Tali nodded and continued to stare deep into her glass. "She was so rude." She gave a small chuckle. "What did Jack call her? Cerberus cheerleader, with her perfect genes, and that attitude, and… and still, she got it done. She stopped her father."

The bitterness in her tone took Kaidan a little by surprise. He felt a little like he'd come in for the last twenty minutes of a film. He had read dossiers on all of Shepard's crew during the time she was working with (not for) Cerberus, and he'd gotten to read over Shepard's debriefing report on her activities during that time. He knew about Miranda Lawson, and Subject Zero, and about Shepard helping Tali with her trial and about Tali's father's death. Obviously, though, there were things that hadn't been covered in the reports. There was a minefield of nuance and subtext here that he just wasn't qualified to handle tactfully.

Still, Shepard had asked for his help, and he was more than willing to do whatever it took to show her that he was there for her, however she needed him. Kaidan tried to remember everything he knew about Miranda Lawson. She'd been a long-time Cerberus Operative, one of the Illusive Man's top brass, so to speak. She'd been the head in charge of Project Lazarus. She'd been Shepard's XO when she'd first been in command of the SR-2. She'd apparently defected from Cerberus after the mission to the collector base. Her father Henry Lawson was the one in charge of the research facility on Horizon, and he thought he'd heard around the ship that she'd been there at Sanctuary, something about her sister. He hadn't really heard much. Everyone had been so excited about capturing Leng and working on the cure.

"You seem pretty upset, Tali. What happened with Miranda?" Kaidan kept his voice low and compassionate.

Tali's head came up and she looked at him. He watched her eye lights narrow slightly as she looked at him. "That's right, you weren't there. You don't know."

She swirled the straw in the class carefully and seemed to be considering how to answer him. "She did whatever it took to stop her father." Tali's voice was low and sad. "She never gave into him. Never changed herself to please him. In the end, she gave her life fighting against him."

Kaidan's eyebrow shot up. This was news to him. He wasn't aware Miranda Lawson was dead. He scowled as Tali continued, and wondered why Shepard hadn't said anything to him about what had happened at the top of that tower.

"I've spent the last week trying to forget about what happened. Keeping busy with all this Kai Leng stuff helped, but, I just can't seem to get those images out of my head."

"Tell me about it, maybe that will help," Kaidan whispered and leaned on the bar. He did think it would help her to talk about it, but he also had his own selfish reasons for wanting to know what had happened.

"We got up there, to the top of the tower, and we found them. Miranda was lying on the floor, her whole side a bloody mess. Kai Leng had beaten us there and gone, but not before he ran her through with that damned sword of his. I mean, who uses a sword!? The guy's some kind of evil space ninja, which is ridiculous," she scoffed as she tried taking another sip.

Kaidan reached out and helped her steady the glass.

"Thanks," she muttered when she was done. "The other two were just standing there, Lawson had a gun on his own daughter and Shepard," Tali's voice faded as she seemed to withdraw into the memory.

"Shepard talked him down. She got him to give up Oriana in exchange for his freedom, but I think she knew…" she stopped again and Kaidan struggled to follow, resisting the urge to ask questions. "Once Oriana was safe with Shepard Miranda blasted him right through the glass and threw him off the tower and down into his own evil laboratory. It was poetry," she said in a breathless sigh, "and better than he deserved, but then…"

Tali had to pause her narrative and take another drink, finishing what was in her glass with a loud slurp. "Oh, Kaidan, it was terrible. I love Shepard, don't get me wrong, and I know she has had it rough. This war has been harder on her than most people and she's had to be hard, so hard…" Kaidan heard her swallow, even through her envirosuit. "You should have seen her face, Kaidan. Her eyes were so cold. Miranda was probably a goner anyway, what with the blood loss and all, but Shepard didn't even try to save her. She just stood there and watched. She watched Miranda say goodbye to her sister and then she took the tracker from Miranda and she just stood there, till she was gone." Tali shoved the glass away from her and almost toppled backwards from her stool.

Kaidan reached across the bar and grabbed both her forearms to steady her. "Easy, Tali, take it easy."

"I'm fine," Tali said after a moment and pulled her arms away. "I'll be okay. I know why she did what she did. I know that if it had been anyone other than Miranda Shepard would have been on her knees dosing her with medi-gel and putting pressure on her wound. I know that she hated Miranda because of Thane. But her eyes, Kaidan. If I didn't know any better, I would have said she _wanted _Miranda to die, but Shepard's not like that, right?"

Kaidan didn't know what to say at first. He'd listened to every word Tali spoke very carefully, and had begun to have doubts about her reliability, because of her intoxication, but the way her voice cracked now, so full of hopeful despair; he couldn't help but believe her every word. Feeling the silence had gone on too long he rushed into comforting her.

"Of course, Shepard's not like that. She was just pissed about Leng getting away, and Lawson's research and all those people. I'm sure Shepard was just overwhelmed. She's only human, you know, no matter how much we want her to be the perfect warrior and person, and savior of the galaxy, she's just a woman. Even I can forget that sometimes."

Tali nodded at his words but he wasn't sure he had really made her feel any better. She turned and slid off her seat, took a step and went right down onto her knees.

"Tali!" Kaidan shouted as he walked around the bar and knelt at her side. "Careful," he whispered and put an arm around her back. "Let's get you to bed, okay?"

Tali nodded and Kaidan began to wonder if quarians could throw up. He also felt his ever constant worry for Shepard deepen. If only he could get her to open up again, and let him in. He just didn't know how to get her to listen. He just didn't know Shepard anymore.

**AN: I know this chapter is shorter than normal, I was hoping to get to the cure administration this chapter, too, dang it, but I've been sick and the holidays are crazy, so we'll have to do that next time. So tune in next week, kids. Same bat time, same bat channel. And happy holidays!**


	10. Chapter 9

**AN: This chapter's a little longer, hopefully that makes up for short one last week. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: The author of this fic (me) may or may not be entirely sane, but I'm not crazy enough to think I actually own Mass Effect. Except on Wednesdays.**

Chapter 9

Kai Leng's limbs were reacting slowly. He tried to push himself off the floor where he'd tumbled, behind the med bay table he'd been laying on. Another explosion went off just outside the med bay doors and he found himself rocked back against the aft wall, his head cracking solidly make him wince and his skull ache.

After another moment of gathering his strength and forcing himself to focus on the task at hand he managed to get to his feet. He leaned against the table he'd been lying on, (or had he been sitting?), before the explosions had begun. His memory was a big blank mass whenever he tried to remember the last few minutes.

He took in his surroundings, even as he felt his training and instincts kicking in. He glanced down. His wrists and ankles still bore the shackles, but the magnetic locks were disengaged and he had sufficient length between them to walk and defend himself.

He glanced out the window on his right, looking into the ships mess hall and commons area. Through the smoke and flickering light of burning debris he could make out the shapes of several people running and shooting weapons. He couldn't see who they were fighting.

_I was waiting for a chance to escape,_ Leng thought, _guess this is it._

He scanned the room quickly for a weapon. Finding nothing he decided to press on without. He walked quickly around the tables and counters, keeping his eyes on the window looking outside, and watching for any threats or opportunities to arm himself.

Leng had to force the med bay doors apart with his bare hands, as it seemed there was some damage to the electrical systems controlling its opening mechanism. As soon as he could squeeze through he pushed himself out into the smoke and chaos.

He noticed several downed crew members, their faces blank and lifeless under the flashing emergency lights. From around the corner he heard a loud, inhuman growl followed by a serious of short staccato grunts. There were heavy thudding footsteps moving on the other side of the wall he had his back braced against. It sounded like a herd of zombie elephants was exiting the elevator. He looked around quickly for an escape. He was unarmed and shackled. A head on assault would be a bad idea, he thought.

Leng spotted a ventilation duct and moved quickly to it. It pulled from the wall with a metallic ripping sound. He threw the grate at a lumbering shadow that approached through the smoke and leaped nimbly onto the mess table before taking aim and diving into the vent.

He didn't hesitate, moving quickly though the metalwork ducts, looking carefully around corners before pushing on. He didn't have to go far to find another grate that opened into the elevator shaft. He kicked it loose at the corners before hitting it dead center and sending it spinning out into the open shaft behind it.

Kai stuck his head out carefully, looking up and down. The elevator had moved down to the lower deck and he had only a small jump to the service ladder that ran the length of the empty shaft. Once he was gripping the small rungs he had a choice to make. . As much as he wished the attack was coming from Cerberus Operatives sent to rescue him, he was pretty sure that wasn't who the Alliance marines were facing.

If he went down he could make his way to the shuttle bay, hijack a shuttle and leave the Normandy to face the enemy alone. The shuttles had some short-range FTL capabilities, and he was a more than competent pilot. He had a good chance of making it somewhere he could contact the Illusive Man for pick up.

He could also go up. He knew that the airlock off the ship was located at the front of the CIC, just behind the pilot's bridge. Depending on who was attacking the Normandy, he could possibly stow away on the enemy ship, maybe even steal it out from under their noses. That would have more possibilities for long range travel, but he would likely have to eliminate whatever enemy forces were left behind. Odds were he'd be greatly outnumbered.

He could also look for an available escape pod. Depending on what the situation was outside the ship that was likely his best chance to escape the immediate vicinity, but he would then be stranded on whatever habitable or semi-habitable planet or moon was nearby, if there were any. Drifting in space waiting for an Alliance rescue squad definitely wasn't his first choice.

Leng started climbing down.

He had to squeeze past the elevator stopped on deck 3, climbing awkwardly past it on his way to the shuttle bay. Finding a grate that opened onto the level he needed, he gripped it the slats tightly and pulled. He nearly lost his balance and tumbled backwards when the grate came loose more easily than he'd suspected it would.

He just managed to keep from swearing, though his clinking shackles and the crash of the grate on the floor below made his efforts to be silent seem a bit wasted. Suddenly the elevator above him began lowering slowly towards his head. Kai dove quickly into the new duct, narrowly avoiding losing his feet in the process and made his way towards the shuttle bay.

He found himself looking down on a terrifying battle. Several Alliance marines were backing away from the elevator, their weapons raised and firing a constant barrage at the now opening elevator doors. He could hear the men screaming with the bloodlust and terror of battle, and smell the old, familiar scents of war. His nose was filled with the cloying odors of blood, smoke, expended thermal clips and the faint, but noticeable hints of ozone and death that wafted through the slats of the grate beneath him.

Something flashed through his line of sight so quickly that he might have missed it if he'd blinked. His eyes automatically tracked the motion, and he witnessed one of the Normandy crew being tackled to the ground by a blue-glowing humanoid form that grunted and growled as it bit into the marine's face.

The husk was soon followed by a line of Cannibals, stumbling, shambling masses of lumpy, grotesque tissue and mangled limbs.

Reapers.

There were Reaper forces assaulting the Normandy.

Kai gathered his surprise and revulsion together with his panic and shoved them down under his training and instincts. He could figure out what this would mean in terms of the bigger picture later. For now, Kai knew he needed to focus on survival.

He watched the line of monstrosities push father into shuttle bay. The shouts of the marines were coming from the far end of the room now, where they'd fallen back to take cover behind some of the stacked cargo.

Leng carefully pushed the grate open, letting it swing on its hinge. Using it as cover he lowered his head through the gap beneath him and took a quick peek below him. All of the reaper forces had pushed past his location, and were battling it out at the far end of the bay. He silently hoped that the shuttles weren't taking too much damage from stray fire, or not so stray fire. He wouldn't put it past the Reapers to try and disable any means of escape as a first priority.

He was committed now, though.

Lowering himself carefully through the gap, trying not to draw any attention, he dropped to the floor below, his ankle shackles rattling softly. Otherwise he was completely silent as he took a few steps forward. Crouching slowly, he pulled a heavy pistol from the grip of the marine that was now missing his face and then dashed to his left, seeking shelter behind the rows of Cargo along the port side hull.

He had lost of practice moving silently through the shadows, and he now used those skills now as he moved forward, climbing over the large bins where there wasn't sufficient space for him to move between the blocks of cargo.

From one high vantage point he had a bird's eye view of the conflict going on below. A majority of the reaper forces had been mowed down by the persistent barrage of slugs coming from the marine's positions behind cover. The shuttle was being used by one of the heavily armored figures as cover, which would make boarding the shuttle exceptionally difficult. His best bet was to wait until the battle was finished, hope the victors would leave to help their comrades, or remove the victors from the equation if that were possible. Then he'd be free and clear to take the shuttle at his leisure.

Kai tightened his grip on the pistol in his hand and continued working his way towards to front of the ship. He heard inhuman grunts and growls and the constant pounding of kinetic slugs into flesh and other solid objects. From time to time he also heard the chiming ping of slugs on shield or a barrier, and, of course, there was the sound of men dying.

Despite their numbers being whittled down, the Cannibals were still unleashing a devastating hammer of their own weapon fire. When he reached the end of the row of cargo he found what had once been a dozen or so marines were now only four.

He watched carefully from his concealment as one of the marines behind the shuttle caught a handful of slugs in his right shoulder. The man spun away to hit the back wall and crumple to the floor after being shot again and again by an advancing Cannibal.

Kai balanced on the balls of his feet and prepared to move as soon as the path was clear. He didn't want to miss his opportunity.

One of the Cannibals stepped over one of its fallen comrades, wrenching a limb off, as it did and jamming the shoulder socket into its own hip. After a strange motion under the thing's (was it skin?) surface the new appendage began flexing fingers and bending far too many joints as it reached the cover of one of the Normandy crew. The monstrous thing leaned over a large crate and began taking aim with its large arm gun at the crouched figure behind it.

In a flash, the marine had grabbed the reaper by its grotesque new arm and launched it into one of its remaining fellows. The two Cannibals went tumbling backwards, crashing into a mound of roiling, putrescent flesh. Without a word the three remaining humans surged together in a dance of death that impressed even one of Cerberus' best.

The soldier that had tossed the Cannibal, followed through with a deadly thrust of their omni-blade, driving it dead center of two pairs of glowing eyes while the other two moved from out to cover the armored form by concentrating their fire on the last Cannibal still standing.

When that one had finally dissolved into a pulsing, running mass of goo, the both ran over to assist with the dispatching of the final enemy, which was trying desperately to absorb the oozing figure lying on top of it. With its new hardened shell, it took all three marines, blasting and stabbing the thing to finally finish the thing off.

With their focus elsewhere Leng made his move. He ran in a crouch, hiding around the corner of the shuttle, not far from the downed body of the marine he'd seen shot while he waited for the door to open after he'd quietly palmed the access panel.

He watched the Normand crew as they swiftly moved through the enemy forces making sure they were all really and truly dead. The excellently maintained hydraulics made no sound as they moved; though they seemed tortuously slow to Kai.

When he had enough room to squeeze under, he moved quickly and quietly into the open space beyond. He tried palming the door shut again, instantly, but it seemed the door was determined to finish the opening cycle.

Not wanting to waste time, Kai sprinted to the front of the shuttle and began the startup protocols. He knew it was only a matter of time before the Alliance goons realized someone was aboard their shuttle, and hoped they would be too preoccupied to investigate. He heard glanced over his shoulder and saw the door was finally open completely.

Using the main command panel he ordered the door shut and locked, and then he checked fuel levels, hull integrity, and power cells. It seemed, despite the battle that had raged next to it only moments ago that the hull was intact enough to fly. As soon as the alert flashed that the door was sealed he wasted no time sending the command to open the outer cargo bay door.

Leng grinned. He was moments away from freedom. He turned the pilot's seat, preparing to sit in it when he heard the voice. It had the hollow distant sound of a voice being relayed through a headset.

"And just where the hell do you think you are going?" The all too familiar voice was coming from right behind him.

Leng felt his grin drop off as he stood straight. Slowly, he turned to look behind him.

The first thing his eyes focused on was the dark, gaping barrel of a large assault rifle. Behind that, he was faced with the impressive and heavily armored marine from the cargo bay. He noticed now the faintly feminine shape of the hips, bust and shoulders, and despite the facial features being masked by the helmet, he now recognized the figure he'd been watching so admiringly.

He smiled wryly, and shook his head slightly. _I should have known…_

"Your ship's gotten a bit crowded for my taste," he shrugged, keeping his body from tensing.

"Sorry to say, but your flight's been cancelled," Shepard said testily as she used the assault rifle to order him away from the controls. "Drop the pistol," she added verbally, almost as an afterthought.

"What? This pistol?" Kai asked and tossed the pistol in her face, at the same time he ducked and rolled to his left, coming up under the end of Shepard's gun, out of range of its fire.

Shepard had neatly used the rifle to knock the pistol away, but he used the momentary distraction to lash out, his leg sweeping in an arch to knock her legs out from under her.

Leng lunged for the pistol as it went skidding across the shuttle hold's floor, coming to rest against the shuttle door. He had it gripped in his left hand as he felt a booted foot slam into his lower back, forcing him against the side of the shuttle. He rolled away, jarring his right shoulder as he whipped around and took hasty aim. The chain linking his shackles whirled out in front of him in a glittering arch.

With Shepard in his sights he pulled the trigger.

Click, click, click.

The thermal clip was dry. He hadn't taken the time to check it when he'd lifted it off the dead man. He growled and hoped that hadn't been a fatal mistake as he continued to roll. Shepard's heel crashed down where his stomach had been, and he pushed off the other wall, leaping to his feet just in time to duck the butt of her assault rifle as it swung at his head.

Kai shifted quickly from defensive to offensive. He reached out and grabbed the end of her assault rifle, jerking Shepard forward, setting her off balance before slamming it back again, and cracking it against her face plate viciously. He hit her again with the side of her own rifle before she gained her senses back enough to respond.

The Commander wrenched the rifle down and out of his grasp, her head lashing forward to connect with his. Kai grunted in pain and stepped back, his shoulder connected with the hull on his left and he pushed off of it bringing his arms up and over his head to land a heavy blow on her shoulder with the butt of the pistol still in his grip. His arm went numb with the shock of connecting with her sturdy armor, but Shepard staggered backwards, under the weight of the blow.

Kai wasted none of his advantage as he barreled into the woman, her head snapping violently and connecting with the floor with an echoing crack that rang through the enclosed space. Kai straddled the prone figure and raised the pistol, preparing to bring it down on the face plate.

The body beneath him was completely limp. He paused, his chest heaving with exertion, waiting for Shepard to spring her trap. It never came.

He reached down and unclasped the back of her helmet, his restraints slithered prettily across her neck as he gripped the back of it, pulling it off. Her head rolled unpleasantly, and her mouth hung open loosely. Kai noticed a streak of red in her hair, and pushed her face to the left, eying the blood trickling from the back of her skull.

He grunted in surprise and stood with one leg on each side of her hips.

"That was almost too easy," he whispered, his eyes narrowing slightly.

As if to prove him wrong, the front of the shuttle started chirping with a barrage of alarms. He stepped gingerly over Shepard and quickly sat in the command chair. His hands and eyes flew over the controls, trying to determine how bad it was.

Apparently the elevator had arrived with another group of reaper forces, which were now opening fire on the shuttle. The cargo bay door was announcing it was fully open, and the proximity alarms were announcing a large vessel heading straight for the new opening.

'Collision imminent in t-minus 47 seconds,' the flashing countdown began.

Leng began punching buttons and felt the hum in his feet as the mass effect field kicked on. The shuttle lurched unpleasantly when he engaged the thrusters, and in his rushed escape, and he narrowly missed scraping the shuttle on the side of the bay door in his hurry to get out of the way of the incoming craft.

He accelerated away, alerts and warnings coming from several different areas of the command panel. He tried orienting the shuttle towards the nearest relay, but, not knowing their current location, had to waste precious time scanning the navigation charts and trying to figure out where in the hell he was. It appeared the Normandy was in orbit around a large, planet that showed green and blue with swirls of white on the holographic display.

From aft of the shuttle there was shuddering concussion. The reaper vessel had slammed into the cargo bay and the resultant explosion caused the shuttle to rock and bounce turbulently. Ten seconds later there was another explosion, this one exponentially larger, as the Normandy exploded.

Leng found himself tossed onto the floor, his head connecting heavily with the edge of the console on the way down. He groaned in pain and clutched his forehead. His fingers came away sticky and red. He wiped furiously at the gash and lurched to his feet, sliding back into the pilot's seat.

He took stock of the damage and their new trajectory. The display showed them now fighting a losing battle against the planet's gravity. The force of the Normandy blowing up had sent them careening deeper into the planet's orbit.

Kai's fingers flew as he tried to course correct, attempting to angle the nose of the shuttle up far enough to let them skip across the top of the atmosphere. He had no idea which planet was sucking them in now, and had no desire to be stranded on some uncharted backwater mud ball.

It seemed one of the thrusters had been extensively damaged by the force of the explosion, though, and he had no luck getting his commands to initiate. They were going down. He verified the mass effect drive was still functioning and diverted as much power to the field as possible.

Kai Leng was an old hand at crash landing shuttles, at this point. After working desperately to compensate for the rate of descent and acceleration of the shuttle, he managed to bring the shuttle down, without too much trouble, and relatively softly, on the side of a heavily-wooded mountain. The thumps and bumps of plant life being flattened beneath the shuttle almost knocked him from his seat again, but he managed to hang on as he set the shuttle down manually, using the mass effect drive to pilot them in a clumsy, but more or less effective fashion.

Once the shuttle was down, and fully stopped, he began taking readings from the sensors that weren't damaged. It seemed the atmosphere was breathable, the pressure bearable, and the gravity comparable. It had all the luxuries of home. Perhaps he would get lucky and there would be human inhabitants close enough to help him contact his boss and order and extraction.

Stepping over the prone body of the Commander, Kai moved to open the door and take a look outside. He pulled Shepard's assault rifle from her limp grasp and checked it over. It appeared a little worse for the wear, but he thought it would fire. He checked the thermal clip and chastised himself again for his earlier oversight.

He hadn't made such a rookie mistake in years, and he was lucky it hadn't cost him his life. He eyed the surrounding forest once the shuttle door was open. The trees were familiar, much like something you would find on Earth. The low brush and foliage wasn't something he had names for, but the familiar shapes reminded him of his childhood. He made him tense, forcing himself to stay on guard and not get too familiar, too comfortable.

Who knew what kinds of alien dangers lurked out there in the shadows? Kai leaned his head back inside and turned to look back at the figure on the floor next to his feet. He needed to do some more information gathering. He would need to look up any information on the shuttles computer he could get, and then send out a general distress signal. Perhaps he should hold off on that until he was sure the Reapers weren't going to send forces after him. He should also gather any and all supplies from the shuttles emergency kit, make sure he had food and water to last him a while, until he could find help or figure out another source of food and find fresh water.

First, though, he needed to make sure Shepard was dead.

There was a drying trickle of red that ran between the metal rivets in the floor paneling. His eyes followed it until it disappeared under her left ear. Her eyes were closed and her face slack, but he was a professional, and professionals always made sure.

Leng knelt slowly, his eyes skimming her armored form, wondering if he could scavenge any of it for himself. Shepard was not a small figure, and he was lithe enough in build. Perhaps some of it would fit him. His hand hovered briefly over her sternum before he reached down and slid two fingers up under her jaw, searching for her pulse.

He found it a half second before Shepard's fist snapped up and connected solidly with his left temple, throwing him off balance and out the open shuttle door.

He lay sprawled on the forest floor for only an instant before he whipped his body up in a gymnastic arch and landed, crouched on his feet.

Shepard sat up, one hand behind her head, feeling the contusion on the back of her skull. Her eyes narrowed at Leng as he aimed her own assault rifle back in her face. He considered pulling the trigger and ending her there and then, but since she was awake, maybe he could use her to get some of the information he needed.

Lifting his eyes from the sights, Kai looked at her over the top of the gun. "Where are we?" he asked in a tone that demanded a complete and honest answer at once.

"I was just going to ask you the same question," she snarled and wiped the blood on her fingers onto one thigh. "Where's my ship?" Her tone sounded just as formidable as his.

"Gone," he tossed back, "What planet was the Normandy orbiting when the Reapers attacked?"

Shepard's eyes went wide and she pushed herself onto her knees. "What do you mean, gone?"

Kai tightened his grip and sighted down the rifle again and took a step back and readied himself to fire should she move towards him any farther. She must have noticed the movement, for her hands came up in a non-threatening manner, though her face solidified into a stony mask that threatened any number of horrible and painful retributions.

"What did you do to my ship?" The tone of her voice chilled him thoroughly and he placed his finger more tightly on the trigger, as though she'd taken a menacing step forward. "Where is my crew, Leng?"

They stared each other down for several seconds. Kai weighed the pros and cons of just putting one between her eyes and calling it good. In the end, he decided the situation called for caution and prudence. It cost him nothing to answer her questions and perhaps she could provide information crucial to his survival on this planet.

"I don't know for certain, but I'd guess your crew is dead. The Reapers destroyed your ship right after we got off. That's how we ended up here. The thrusters were damaged when the Normandy went up. I'll ask you again, what planet is this?"

She ignored his question, and her eyes burned with fury. "You just left them to die?! This is all your fault! I could have stopped them, I could have…" Shepard fell forward onto all fours and struggled to get her rage under control. "What have you done?" she whispered hoarsely.

"Blaming me does us no good. I need to know where we are so I can make a plan to get out of here. If you want to help me, I can put in a good word with the Illusive Man, get him show you the same… hospitality you gave me." The thought of her wearing the shackles that still draped around his wrist made him grin evilly. "You can surrender and cooperate, or I can put you down now. You're choice."

He would never know what her answer would have been. Just at that moment, there was a hissing shriek as dozens of flaming Reaper meteors began falling all around them.

The ground beneath his feet shook slightly as he stepped back from the shuttle in surprise.

"No time to argue about who is who's prisoner," Shepard said caustically as she reached behind her back and unfolded a long, deadly looking sniper rifle.

Kai focused the assault rifle back on her face.

"Don't be stupid, Leng. The Reapers are the threat here. If we want to survive we're going to have to work together." She followed her words with a thermal clip that she pulled out of some hidden slot in her armor and tossed it to him.

His reactions were lightning quick as he snatched the clip from the air deftly. He continued to eye her suspiciously as she did a quick check on her weapon. He knew she was right. The air around them was already filling with the inhuman roars of the demented creatures. Smoke was drifting in from where falling meteors had light the canopy.

Finally, Kai nodded and stepped back, not wanting to turn his back on her, but knowing his attention was needed on the incoming Reaper hoard, he waited for her to hop down and step beside him before he turned and began looking for targets. He watched from the corner of his eye as she crouched and braced her sniper rifle on the trunk of one of the trees felled during their landing.

With her scope, she spotted the enemy before he did and the crack of her gun echoed loud and clear off the trees around them.

He knelt behind the same trunk and used it to cover the bulk of his body as he scanned the horizon. In the dim light that filtered down through the branches above made the whole forest floor writhe in flickers and shadows.

It was the glowing eyes he noticed first. A line of them moved forward through the underbrush and he quickly took aim and fired.

He felt his blood sing as he watched the hideous creatures fall. From time to time one of the things would explode in a shower of gore as Shepard's slugs ripped through them. He was grinning ferociously as the last of the first wave fell. Shepard stayed where she was, poised as she searched through her scope for something else to shoot. Her face was smooth and calm, but her eyes danced with the thrill of vengeance reaped.

He watched her face from the corner of his eye as he waited. When her face shifted he turned sharply to look at her. Her eyes were wide and her lips pressed tight.

"Run," she whispered so softly he wasn't sure he'd heard right.

"What?" he said, his body tense.

"We have to run," she yelled, rising to her feet and moving to the front of the shuttle. "There's too many, we have to run!" She didn't pause to explain further, or check to see if he followed, she simply disappeared around the nose of the wreck.

Kai stood as the persistent shadows of the forest coalesced into a wall of glowing eyes. He shuddered in horror and leaped to follow.

Shepard had started out a good distance ahead of him, but she was weighed down in her armor and he quickly caught up. The going was easy at first, and then the terrain began to steepen sharply. Before long, Leng found himself barreling treacherously down the side of the mountain, using all his focus and control to keep himself from tumbling head over heels. The last thing he needed now was a snapped neck or broken leg. Such an injury would be the end of him, for sure.

Shepard had slowed when the incline had sharpened, not keeping up with his breakneck speed. He hurried on, not waiting for the cautious commander. Soon, he could see where the ground evened out and he put on a burst of speed, hurdling a fallen tangle of brush. Ahead, through the trees, he could see the flash of sunlight on water. It looked too big to be a river. A lake perhaps?

Leng slowed somewhat as he reached to bottom of the slope where the ground leveled out. He pushed through some heavily grouped branches, slowing himself more as he felt the leaves whip against his face and pull at his limbs. He was down to a jog when he burst through the tree line, the long expanse of the water stretching away in both directions. The sharp line of the water curved away behind the tree lined shore. The waterline where he stood was murky with soggy green growth and dancing reeds.

He glanced around, and a feeling of déjà vu washed over him so suddenly that he staggered to a halt. He knew that shoreline, this lake. It was a place he'd gone as a young man, back on Earth. As one of the few protected nature reserves remaining in the large city-state region of Asia Majoris, Kanasi Lake had been one of the places he visited with his stepfather to get away from the city and do some training. It was one of the very few places that held good memories from his first life. It also featured very heavily in his dreams. It was also very, very far away from where he was now. There was no way this was Earth. It had to be a dream then, but…

Kai's chest heaved from his sprint down the mountain and he felt every muscle in his body strung tighter then bow strings. This didn't feel like any dream he'd ever had. He glanced behind him and watched as Shepard finally caught up to him, her own chest heaving and her face pinched with exertion.

Shepard.

Lake Kanasi.

The memories flowed back into him with the weight of a tsunami.

* * *

_He was kissing Shepard beside the lake, the one he remembered from his youth. When he finally managed to drag himself out of her fierce grip, the silvery light overhead flashed brightly and he woke violently. The light in the med bay caused him to wince sharply. It took only seconds for his to adjust and shapes to become clear enough for him to see that same, familiar face watching him from his bedside._

_Kai jerked to a sitting position, his restraints chiming softly from the sudden movement. His heart hammered gently in his chest and he watched her face, wondering if she could read his thoughts and knew what he'd been dreaming seconds before._

_Shepard's face betrayed nothing, however, as she stood straight, her arms crossing under her chest. _

"_Good, you're up," she nodded solemnly and waved Dr. Chakwas over. The good doctor scanned him quickly, looking him over critically. _

_He forced his heart to slow and breathed slow, deep breaths and finally she nodded in approval. _

"_Bad dreams?" Dr. Chakwas asked, curiously._

_Leng simply grunted, not sure what category to put dreams about kissing the enemy in. Disturbing seemed an apt word to describe his state of mind. He wondered then if Shepard had already begun brainwashing him. It would explain the dream. _

_He eyed the way her arms pressed up gently underneath her breasts and decided he was lucky his dreams hadn't been more graphic. It wouldn't have been very dignified of him to wake up sporting a hard on for his captor. _

_It was only natural for his mind to fixate on the woman, attractive or not, and he decided the brainwashing idea was a bit pre-mature. _

_When his eyes moved away from Shepard's shapely curves back to Dr. Chakwas, he was forced to reconsidered, yet again. She was wielding a rather large syringe, its needle almost six inches long._

"_You're sure intravenous won't be good enough?" Shepard asked mildly, eyeing the needle with calm speculation._

"_It'll be more effective delivered straight into the Cerebrospinal fluid, as close to the brain stem as I can get," Chakwas said with a shake of her head. _

_Kai defiantly didn't like the sound of that._

_The Normandy's head medical officer watched his shoulders tense and shook her head again._

"_It's no good to fight us, boy. You'll only hurt yourself. Be a good lad and roll onto your stomach now, and hold still for me. This is for your own good, you know. We're only trying to help." Her voice was soft and soothing, the slight accent purring gently over his nerves. He refused to be soothed._

_Leng leaned away and looked around for escape. Shepard's eyes narrowed and she nodded to the marines standing at the foot of the bed._

_It took four of them, one of them the hulking, mohawked Lieutenant he'd put down back on Horizon, to get him on his stomach and his wrists and ankles mag locked to the bedframe, his arms pulled tight over his head and pinning his head in place. He continued to struggle momentarily, before the waves of familiar fatigue pressed him into submission._

_He felt the hair pulled back of his neck and hands held him immobile as the pinch at the base of his skull came quick and piercing. He'd felt pain as cold ran up his spine and into his brain and then dizzy as the pinching eased and the hands on his head and shoulders and hips let go._

_It had seemed like his body had been floating, weightless in zero g's, darkness swirling around him, closing in. Then he'd heard the voice._

"_Resistance Protocol initiated," the booming words seemed to echo in the hollow of his brain, and then he blacked out._

* * *

Stunned, Kai stepped back, water running up around his ankle and mud squishing between his toes. He nearly lost his balance and toppled backwards, but a strong hand on his forearm kept him upright. He jerked his arm from Shepard's grip, nearly losing his balance again.

"What's wrong with you?" Shepard shouted, but her voice sounded as though it came from far away. "Snap out of it, Leng!"

He stepped away from her, his other foot sinking into the wet muck of the lake shore. "What have you done to me?" he said, voice hoarse with shock and desperation.

Shepard stared at him incredulously and shouted again. "I'm trying to save your ass!" she yelled and reached forward to pull him out of the water.

He jerked away and took another step backwards. The water was up to his knees now.

"Why won't you let me help you?!" she demanded to know, her face showing the strain of her frustration.

Kai turned away, preparing to dive into the water to get away from the devious Alliance wench, and was stopped dead in his tracks when he came face to face with Shepard. Not the angry, demanding, armed and armored Shepard behind him. This one was the same one from his dream, watery and shimmering with silvery light and haunting beauty. She raised a slender graceful wrist and held it out to him.

"Come with me, Kai," Her voice melted over his skin like silky chocolate. "I won't let her have you."

Kai half turned and took a step back so that he could see both Shepards.

The first was irate and impatient, eying him as if he'd gone mad. "We have to go! They're coming! You trying to get yourself killed!?"

The second was lovely and enticing with satin skin and shiny hair and that siren song voice that called to him. "You are mine, Kai. Come to me…"

That Shepard was just plain wrong. He looked back at the first to see her staring in terror at the hill they'd just run down. Through the trees he could see the blue glow of the reaper forces streaming from between the trees. The sounds of the reaper hoard could now be heard thundering down the mountain.

He turned back to Shepard in the water and noticed that the silvery halo of light around her had darkened, reflecting the light from the hill he could see now that it was not silver as he'd first thought, but blue. Blue like the eyes of a Cannibal, or the vein like tubes under the stretched and desiccated skin of a husk. Blue like the Reapers.

Leng raised his assault rifle and opened fire. The slugs ripped through Shepard's skin like it was made of tissue paper. Beneath, there was a shambling, black and blue husk that roared and lurched towards him. Kai stepped away and continued firing. Besides him, Shepard number one raised her sniper rifle and pulled the trigger in one swift fluid motion. The husk exploded into dust and the light went out.

The water around his legs rushed up suddenly and buried him in a weightless flood of ache and agony. He reached out desperately and felt Shepard One take his hand, squeezing his fingers tightly.

From far away he heard her voice, wavering and distorted.

"Fight them, Leng! You can do it! Just snap out of it, already!"

He did.

**AN: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh! This chapter was so hard to write! But so much fun at the same time. I really want to hear what you guys think! If you liked it, let me know, if you hated it, I want to hear that to. Did you see that coming? I wanna know! Things will really pick up now, and we should be moving in the more Sheng centric bits. I know that seems to be moving at a glacial pace, but I just have to take the time and do it right. I don't want to rush things. In a lot of ways this paring is almost completely unrealistic in a near-cannon universe, but I think I can make it happen. I do want it to feel natural, though, and not rushed or forced, so... please... bare with me. I promise it will be worth the wait.  
**


	11. Chapter 10

**AN: Okay, I know this chapter is a day late and a dollar short, but I wanted to get it up today and the muses were taking the weekend off, so, there you are. As always, concrit is welcome. **

**Disclaimer: Insert standard ownership vs. shameless using of others property in conjunction with writing fanfiction here.**

Chapter 10

"Fight them, Leng! You can do it! Just snap out of it, already!" Shepard ordered the convulsing figure lying on the bed. Leng had been seizing for nearly a minute, what had seemed like forever to those that were trying to keep the thrashing limbs from harm.

The Cerberus prisoner had a gash on his forehead he'd given himself before they'd been able to get his mag locks off and his body turned onto his side.

Chakwas had insisted that was the safest position and they'd all tried to help her keep him secure. The doctor was holding a strip of plastic between his teeth and she was pressing down on his right arm. Vega and a couple of the other marines had jumped in and each had taken a limb.

Suddenly, Kai Leng's eyes flew open and he gasped for air around the bit of plastic in his mouth. Weighed down as he was he wasn't able to sit up, but his motion shifted from seizing to struggling.

"Calm down, boy," Chakwas ordered in her matronly tone and pushed down on his shoulders. "Settle down and we'll be able to release you."

Kai took a few more seconds to come back to himself and then he stopped struggling and lie still on the bed. As soon as he was motionless, the Normandy crew members were able to let go of him and step back. Dr. Chakwas began scanning him with her omni-tool, her face creased with concern.

"How are you feeling now?" she asked as she reached out and applied a quick dose of medi-gel to the gash on his forehead.

Their prisoner chuckled cruelly and coughed slightly. "Like a rat in a cage," he said bitterly, staring at the ceiling above him and trying to keep his entire body from shaking violently.

"You had quite a violent reaction to the meds, but you seem to be doing better now. You have quite the headache, I imagine." Chakwas explained professionally. "You let me know if you start experiencing any other side effects."

"You mean other than the headache, and the hallucinations, and the seizures?" he said contemptuously. "What the hell did you give me?"

"Hallucinations, you say?" The Normandy's doctor sounded more than a little intrigued. "What kind of hallucinations?"

"The vivid kind," Leng said, unhelpfully. He raised a hand to rub his eyes, the light from the room causing his headache to stab painfully behind his eyes. "You could make a killing marketing this stuff for recreational use. If it weren't for the headache and seizures, I mean."

Shepard ignored Leng's bitter sarcasm and looked around for EDI and Liara. They were waiting back by the med bay door, arms crossed and looking slightly shaken. At least, Liara looked shaken. EDI looked as stoic as ever.

"You have the shield on, right?" Shepard asked, knowing the answer, but needing a distraction.

Liara nodded and flipped her omni-tool on. "Yes, Shepard, the Normandy is a reaper signal free zone. When you take him off, though, you'll have to give him one of the mobile prototypes. We'll have a handful ready to go by tomorrow."

Shepard nodded, "Joker, what's our ETA for the Lazarus station?"

The pilot's voice came over the loudspeaker clear and firm. "Eight and a half hours, Commander."

Turning back to the group standing around Kai Leng and Dr. Chakwas she signaled for Vega to reengage the mag locks of Leng's restraints.

"Is that really necessary, Commander?" Dr. Chakwas asked as Kai's arms were locked down at his sides again, connected inexorably to the metal frame on the bed.

Shepard raised one eyebrow. "I believe your words were 'barely human' and 'no telling what he's capable of'.

Karin actually blushed at that. "Well, yes, that he's just been given an experimental medical treatment that caused him fits and seizures. He's in no condition to try anything just now."

Shepard frowned, recognizing her head medical officer's protests for what they were. Guilt.

"I wouldn't put it past him to try something anyway," Shepard said softly. "Besides, that experimental medical treatment means unpredictable reactions and I'd rather he was locked down for the time being. Better safe than sorry, remember? Don't forget for a second who we're dealing with, here."

Dr. Chakwas nodded as she continued her scans.

"So, any ideas as to why he experienced hallucinations?" Shepard asked, eyeing Leng's prone form.

"Oh yes, actually I was expecting something like that. The purpose of the injection was to, in simplified terms, reset this young man's limbic system, chemically speaking."

"Limbic system?" Shepard asked dubiously.

"It's the part of the brain that deals primarily with emotion, behavior, and motivation, hence the ability for the mind to be influenced by indoctrination, but it also contains parts of the brain that deal with spacial recognition and long-term memory creation and has somewhat to do with the dreaming process. It seems, whether it was an effect of the injection itself, or some kind of defensive response by the indoctrination programing, Mr. Leng here was sent into a sort of fugue state that resembles drell solipsism or perhaps an extremely lucid dream. Is that about right?" She directed this last to Leng.

The Cerberus agent frowned, looking extremely troubled.

"It was a resistance protocol," Leng said, almost too quiet to hear.

Shepard looked intently at him before asking quietly, "What did you see?"

Leng glanced her way, looking angry and… disturbed, if not exactly scared. He didn't seem like he was going to answer her question. Then he spoke, his words only slightly strained, and his voice firmly controlled.

"The Normandy was being attacked by Reapers. Shepard and I managed to escape, but the Normandy was destroyed. The Reapers perused and I was forced to make a decision whether to fight against Shepard, or the Reapers. I chose to fight the Reapers."

Shepard frowned and Dr. Chakwas shot her a raised eyebrow. "How very… symbolic," Karin said with a speculative expression. "Perhaps if you had chosen to fight against Shepard, your mind would have torn itself apart fighting the indoctrination, or perhaps not. We can only hope that you are freed from their influence now, and you won't have to suffer anymore side effects of the treatment."

Leng eyed her suspiciously. "So that's it? I'm cured?"

"You tell me," Chakwas said as she eyed some data on her omni-tool. "Do you feel anything has changed? Do you feel any different at all?"

Kai paused and looked inward. Did he feel any different? Aside from the headache, was there anything different about him? There was a certain, indefinable feeling like the feeling of having recently left a crowded room. He considered the things he felt defined him, his skills as an assassin, his instincts for danger and threat analysis, his dedication to humanity, and his loathing of all things alien. All those things seemed the same as always. His loyalty to the Illusive Man and his willingness to do whatever it took to further the cause of Cerberus: to protect humanity and advance their placement in the hierarchy of the galaxy.

If he had been indoctrinated by the reapers then their cure had failed. Either that or their manipulation of him had been very subtle indeed.

Leng frown deepened further. Yesterday, the idea that they thought him indoctrinated at all had caused him intense feelings of anger and revulsion. Now, the fact that he could examine the possibility logically and objectively did say something. He just wasn't sure what, yet.

He shrugged in answer to the doctors questions. "Perhaps. I'm not sure."

"Well," Chakwas said, lowering her omni tool and raising her eyes to the Commander, "It's too soon to tell, and I'm going to have to insist my patient is given a chance to recuperate from his traumatic reaction. He needs food and rest. You can have him when we get wherever we're going." She began shooing marines out of her med bay.

"You too, Commander," Karin said when she noticed Shepard still stood by Leng's bedside.

Shepard raised an eyebrow and gave the doctor a look that seemed to ask, "Are you giving me orders on my own ship?"

Dr. Chakwas remained firm, however. "I'm just going to sedate him, as soon as he's gotten something to eat. I'll keep an eye on him."

Shepard nodded, then, and left.

She walked with quick purposeful strides across the commissary to Liara's room. As she entered Glyph gave his usual greeting, which Shepard ignored, as usual.

"Shepard," Liara said with a welcoming smile. She stood in front of her large computer station and scanned through a large number of official looking documents. "I'm glad you're here. I've been going over all the Cerberus documents I could find on the Lazarus station. I'm hoping to have a good idea what to expect when we arrive. From everything I've seen so far, it appears that no one has even been back since you were removed. It seems odd to me that Cerberus would ignore such a wealth of resources, especially considering how many credits were put into the Lazarus project."

Shepard shrugged slightly. "I'm sure the Illusive Man hasn't forgotten about the place, but it served its purpose and until he starts running low on resources he will be content to let the mech ridden place sort itself out. What I want to know is if there is going to be a problem with any kind of security system that might alert Cerberus of our presence. We're going have our hands full cleaning out the remaining rogue mechs and, although I'm enjoying the idea of holding Leng right under the Illusive Man's nose, it would sort of ruin the fun if Cerberus knew we were there."

"Very well, Shepard, I'll look into it. I'll also talk to EDI about docking codes and protocols. She might have information that can get us in without tripping any alarms."

"Great," Shepard said with an approving nod. "What have you got on Leng so far? Have you managed to come up with some background on him?"

Liara frowned slightly. "I've compiled a list of data I purloined from the Cerberus data base, mostly his medical records and classified mission records. What I haven't been able to find out is where he came from, before he signed on with the Alliance. His enlistment paperwork was filled with so many falsehoods, I couldn't even be sure Kai Leng is his real name. From what I can tell, he arrived on Arcturus Station for enlistment on November 14th, 2172. He arrived on a shuttle which originated from the Asia Majoris Bejing Transport Station, but before that, nothing. I have some requests out for information from some of my Cerberus contacts to get more information, but with communications being what they are, it could be a while before I hear back from them, if I ever do. With the war it's hard to keep track of who's still even out there, alive and reporting in."

"I understand. I know you'll do your best," Shepard said, patting Liara once on the shoulder. "Just send me the files you've got so far. I'll start with that and work from there.

Liara nodded and sent the files to Shepard's omni-tool. There was a soft ping as she received the information, then Shepard was moving again.

As she stood in the elevator, the Commander suppressed the urge to fume over Dr. Chakwas forcing her to reevaluate her schedule. She'd hoped to have all day to re-evaluate her prisoner and determine the success of their experiment. It was true she could use this time to go over the files she'd gotten from Liara and do her homework on Kai Leng. She'd studied what little information she'd had before already, but she knew that had barely scratched the surface. She also knew that her interrogations would go more smoothly once they were set up in the proper environment. Things were awkward at best, here on the Normandy, where she had limited holding facilities.

None of that managed to staunch her frustration, though. Especially when she knew the driving force behind the doctor's butting in was because she felt bad about what they'd had to do Leng. She knew he didn't deserve Karin's guilt or pity. He had deserved what he'd gotten so far and worse.

Ultimately, it wasn't Chakwas' humanity that made her nerves tingle with anxiety, and her patience wane. It was her own lack of compassion.

She'd seen Leng's face when he'd seen the needle. She'd seen his anger and terror, she'd seen him struggle and knew he wasn't undergoing this treatment voluntarily. She'd seen the needle as it entered his neck, going in like a bull's-eye, dead center of the black snake tattoo on his neck, and saw the way every muscle in his body had been tensed and rock hard with strain. She'd watched his body as it started to convulse, seen the skin split over his right brow and split and gush blood as his had had collided so violently with the bed beneath him. She'd been there, helped roll him over and hold him down, she'd felt the taunt tissue beneath his skin writhe and spasm with those terrible tremors.

Still, she felt nothing but a cold hostility for the man. It wasn't like her.

As the elevator doors opened, releasing her into her own private space she felt the tension in her shoulders and tried to relax it. She wondered, vaguely, if she should try to fix that. It was uncomfortable for her to face now, but she could only see it as an advantage in the time to come. If she'd been able to have this detachment with the citizens of Arahtot she'd have saved herself a lot of heartache.

Still, she didn't want to be the person that Cerberus and the Reapers were turning her into. Cerberus had already done their best to make her feel less human. She didn't want them to take that from her compassion and empathy from her as well.

She entered her quarters shaking her head, trying to clear her head of her morose thoughts. She had more important things to focus on now.

She raised her omni-tool and began to scrawl through the files on Leng. She eyed his enlistment information. At the top of the list of papers there was a very familiar form. She had seen hundreds of them in her time. The date at the top read 11\14\2172. If contained basic information, date of birth, location of birth, city and planet of residence at time of enlistment, planetary issued ident number. All the essential information for identifying an individual as who they said they were. All the information was supposed to be verified and double checked by a marine when the applicant checked in. They then received physical and mental evaluations as well as a biotic ability test to filter those with biotic potential into the right training programs and hand to hand and weapons aptitude tests as well.

By the time you were done with the tests and the paper work you had a dozen signatures saying you were acceptable as an Alliance recruit. Then, after all the t's had been crossed and hoops jumped through you signed your contract, received your gear and got your orders. The Alliance had ensured the process was streamlined and orderly, though apparently, not foolproof.

Shepard had done several stints on Arcturus between deployments, handing out equipment or running background checks. Her tech experience made her a desired quantity for assisting candidates through the testing process.

She eyed the date again.

2172 was the year Shepard had enlisted in the marines. The day she turned 18 she had been standing in line with her own paperwork running through her own tests. That had been April. She'd passed the application process, been fast tracked through training, given her background with the Alliance Youth Recruitment Program that she'd been heavily involved in at the group home in Chicago. After she'd been rescued from Mindior she'd spent almost two years at the home, knowing that she would enlist the second she was legally eligible. It seemed Leng hadn't bothered to wait for that.

Either he'd had his false identification data hacked into the Alliance database or he'd bribed the background officer in charge of his file to fudge the double check. She pulled up the signature on the ident check. The name listed in typed print as well as scrawled in the glowing electronic signature was David L. Chavez.

_Chavez!_ She looked again, and sure enough, the familiar name was still there. In November of that year her and her team had just returned from training maneuvers out on the edge of the Terminus. They'd been waiting for the SSV Trafalgar to come out of dry dock where it had been receiving some repairs. She had, along with everyone else waiting for the Trafalgar's repairs, had been assigned enlistment duties. Dave Chavez had been a member of that first crew. A less than exemplary member, she would have said, which had her leaning heavily towards bribery.

She had been administering hand-to-hand proficiency tests to the new recruits that time. Had she given Leng his Alliance UAC Eval? She tried to recall her time on Arcturus at the end of that year, but it was all one fight after another, names and recruits blurring into an indecipherable mess. She'd been anxious to get back out in the field, back to the action, and there had been so many faces.

It was possible.

It didn't really matter, she guessed. If she couldn't remember the line of faces that had moved through her queue she didn't imagine it was very likely that Leng remembered every person he'd run into that hectic day. He'd likely had other things on his mind that day. Besides, it was a large station, and she hadn't been on duty 24\7.

She pushed the idea out of her head and went back to reading. There was bound to be something in this information she could use to crack the code that was Kai Leng.

Seven hours and one splitting headache later, she was no closer to figuring out the man in her med bay. All the information in the data had told her was that Kai Leng was one capable, efficient, alien-hating bastard. She'd already know that, though.

She fingered her temples in firm circles and grunted softly as her empty stomach growled its protest at being neglected all day. She closed her omni-tool and strode out to the elevator. She would grab some head-meds from the doc and then grab a bite to eat.

The med bay was empty.

Shepard paused for half an instant, scanning the room for signs of trouble. Everything seemed in order.

"EDI, where's Dr. Chakwas and our prisoner?" She tried to keep the irritated panic out of her voice.

"Right here, Commander," Chakwas answered before EDI could respond, calling from the chow table across the hall in the commissary.

Shepard turned and walked toward the voice. Sure enough, Dr. Chakwas was standing nearby as Leng sat at the table, slowly and methodically working his way through a rations pack. Vega and Vakarian were standing behind him, arms crossed and weapons close. They both seemed at ease in their stance, but she knew at a second's notices they could have Leng immobile and subdued, his arms wrenched nearly out of socket and his face pressed deep into the strip of carpet flooring that covered the stretch of hallway.

Leng's eyes rose to meet hers for a moment before he went back to systematically chewing and swallowing the nutrient cubes on the tray in front of him.

Shepard had to suppress a wince. Those cubes would provide every vitamin and mineral the human body needed to survive and thrive. They also tasted like tin foil and cement.

The crew of the Normandy usually had better fare than that, saving the nutcubes for emergencies only.

As if reading her mind, Vega gave a rather ruthless smile and nodded to the small kitchen area across the room. "There's vegetable and beef stew on the stove, Commander. We kept it on simmer, just for you."

Shepard chuckled briefly at the flash of resentment crossed Leng's stoic features, but he didn't even pause in his chew, swallow, bite, chew, swallow routine.

She nodded at Leng as she walked past. "You know, Lieutenant, eight out of ten systems in the Milky Way consider that cruel and unusual punishment."

"It could be worse, Commander," Vega said, his ruthless smirk clashing with the twinkle of amusement in his eyes. "We could have let Joker cook."

Vakarian grunted in agreement. "He'd be better off eating dextro rations."

"I heard that," the voice of the indignant pilot echoed omnisciently from the overhead speakers.

Shepard felt a smile creep up her face as she spooned the thick and chunky stew into a bowl. It was dark with plenty of meat and vegetables; enough to keep any marine healthy.

She grabbed a spoon out of the utensil receptacle and moved back to the table, sitting opposite of Leng.

After taking the first bite she chewed carefully and rolled her eyes back in pleasure. "Is that… cloves?" she asked with a moan after she swallowed. "Where the hell did you find ground cloves, Vega?"

"My secret stash," Vega said with pride. "I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you. You know the drill."

Shepard shot him a smile and then continued to eat, expressing more delight in her food than was strictly necessary. Leng watched her carefully, his expression blank, and she found herself fighting the urge to wink at him sadistically. She forced down her petty delight and finished her food in silence. She finished at the same time Leng swallowed the last of his nutcubes.

She reached across and cautiously and deliberately pulled the dull fork from his grip, and then she grabbed his empty tray and her own dishes and stood, carrying them to the disposal area.

"I take it you're feeling better, then," Shepard tossed over her shoulder at the rising prisoner. She didn't wait for a response. "We've still got a little more than an hour before we arrive, why don't you and I have a little chat, huh?"

"Shepard, he needs some exercise and," Chakwas started in.

Shepard was in a better mood now, her headache a thing of memory only, but she felt her frustration creeping back in and interrupted Karin. "He can do that once we get to the Lazarus station. It'll take us some time to clear out the rest of the mechs and get the place locked down nice and tight. You can take him down to the cargo hold then and let him run around. I just want an hour." Her tone implied it was not really a request.

"Very well. James, Garrus, would you escort our guest to Life Support for the Commander?" Chakwas said with reluctant acquiescence.

"You heard the doc, Cerberus, let's go." Vega said, stepping back and holding out an arm for Leng to go first.

Shepard smiled and tilted her head at the scowling medic. "Thanks, doc."

She followed Vega and Vakarian as they escorted Leng away and resisted the urge to crack her knuckles. 'Time for round 2,' she thought with a determination to leave victorious that thrummed through her like miniature crackling lightning. The anticipation was delicious.


	12. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: And it came to pass in the year of our Lord 2013 that Bioware and EA Games still held sway over the rights and ownership of Mass Effect and all of its glorious wondrousness and therefore was not owned by me, but simply used shamelessly by me for my perverse amusement. Yea, verily yea. **

Chapter 11

Shepard stood with her arms folded casually across her chest, her shoulder leaning against the wall, and eyed her prisoner seated, once again, at the table, his wrists linked to the table by his shackles. He looked back at her, his gaze steady and impenetrable. She said nothing for a few minutes, trying to strategize the best approach, as well as attempting to draw him into speaking first to fill the awkward silence.

Eventually, Leng sat back in his seat, slouching lazily and raised a single eyebrow at her that suggested he could stand the silence indefinitely and had no intention of falling into her oh-so-obvious trap.

She ignored the challenge and tongued her canine tooth while she continued to think. Finally, she spoke, stepping forward to grab the back of her chair and lean her weight on it thoughtfully.

"I don't suppose you're just going to be grateful to us for releasing you from the grip of the Reapers mind control and offer to cooperate fully with us?" Her voice rang with a wry humor that had Kai's lip twitching with the desire to match her mood.

He wanted to be stoic and hateful and blank for this woman. Her and her crew and captured him, tortured him, mocked him and generally belittled and disrespected him. He could still feel the solid weight of the barely edible lump of his meal sitting heavily in his stomach, and the memory of her mirth at his discomfort still danced inside his head. Especially the way she'd licked her spoon and moaned quietly…

Yet, there was the pervading sense that he had been witness to something only a handful of people in the galaxy had ever seen, the legendary Commander Raina Shepard at ease. On her ship and around her crew she was as relaxed and at home as she ever was. It was a different side then her battle hardened warrior persona or her tough as nails interrogator side. It was… enchanting.

Despite the fact that her and her crew had just been having a laugh at his expense, they had been having a laugh and the lightness from that mood had stayed with her, releasing the tension in her face and shoulders and making her practiced nonchalance ease into something natural and charming. It was infectious.

Leng considered fighting it. He was certain he could come up with something that would wipe that pleasant, wry smirk off her face. There was just one thing. He was about eighty percent sure she had been right about the reapers and his indoctrination. This meant he was nearly sure she was, indeed, trying to help him.

Kai finally let his lip slide into a smirk that mirrored hers. "What would be the fun in that?"

Her green eyes danced with amusement. "Well, I certainly don't want you to be bored while you're my prisoner. I'll do my best to help keep things interesting for you." Shepard pulled her chair out and sat down, her hands linking themselves delicately on the table between them. "Why don't we make a game of it then?"

Kai's eyebrow quirked higher all on its own before stopping to ask him permission. He worked on schooling his expression again and linked his fingers, once again mirroring the commander. "A game? While the galaxy is in peril? That seems a bit irresponsible."

Shepard's left shoulder rose slowly and then dropped back into place. "You know how it is; FTL travel can be so tedious."

"What kind of game?" Kai was torn between feeling interested and paranoid.

Shepard shrugged again, leaning forward onto her forearms. "Think of it as a getting to know you game. I ask you a question, if you answer honestly and completely then you can ask me a question, and I'll do the same."

Leng let his skepticism show clearly as he leaned forward as well and started to decline.

Shepard rushed ahead, cutting off his protests. "Top secret or mission critical information is off limits, of course. I'm not going to tell you anything you could take back to Illusive Man, and I suppose, for now, I won't expect you to give away anything you feel would betray Cerberus." Shepard waved her hands dismissively as she sat back, leaning casually back in her chair.

Leng eyed her curiously, trying to read deception or trickery in her expression or posture. If she was playing him, she was hiding it very well. The part of him that was intrigued by her proposition outvoted the part of him that demanded caution and he shrugged, just as casually, leaning back and releasing his interlocked fingers.

"Why the hell not?"

Her answering smile was dazzling and somehow childlike. "Perfect. I'll go first." She looked him up and down for a five count before firing her first question. "Why do you keep doing that?"

His smirk twitched as he silently praised her skills of observation. "Doing what?" he shrugged, coyly.

Her face said he wasn't fooling anyone, least of all her, but she answered him anyway. "Mimicking my every move, and mirroring my mood."

"Oh, that. That's an old anti-interrogation technique I learned during my N7 training. If I'm just showing you what I see, I can't show you anything but yourself. They didn't teach you that one when you were at Rio?"

Shepard's eyebrow raised and her lips slid into a half smirk. "Is that your question?"

Her eyes danced with mischief and Leng knew she'd known exactly what he was doing and why. She'd been testing him. 'Touché,' He thought with a half smirk of his own.

"No. I won't waste a question on something I already know." His underhanded jab at her made her smirk widen slightly. "What I want to know is why we are headed to Lazarus Station."

Shepard's mouth twisted sideways in consideration. Finally, she shrugged and answered with professional directness. "The Normandy isn't built for holding prisoners, especially one of your caliber. I need somewhere secure where I can keep you, and it was the best choice within a reasonable distance. I also know for a fact that it has state of the art medical and scientific labs. Besides, the Illusive Man doesn't seem to be in using it at the moment." The corner of her lip tilted up gently. "Besides, I like the idea of using one of his own labs to keep his own man locked up. It rings of karma or poetic justice or some such delightfully ironic jibe. Have you ever been there before?"

Leng shook his head, "No, but I've seen footage of your… recovery. Do you ever feel guilt over turning on the people that brought you back to return to those that turned their back on you?"

Shepard also shook her head. "I never asked Cerberus to do that, and I never made any pretense that I was only using them to stop the Collectors. The Illusive Man knew who I was and what I stood for before he even brought me back. Hell, that's what he paid for, in the long run, isn't it, my integrity and determination. That, and my ability to get the job done, no matter the cost. I did the job he brought me back for, and it isn't my fault if he has buyer's remorse now." She paused and leaned back in her seat, eyeing him critically again. "Besides, if I had stayed, I would have just ended up indoctrinated like the rest of you and the galaxy would be doomed, so no, I don't feel bad at all. What about you? Are you willing to admit they were in your head?"

"Technically, that's two questions," he said, voice tinged with sarcastic venom, and leaned back. When Shepard failed to rise to the bait he shut his eyes and thought for a minute. Eighty percent was not one hundred percent positive, but he didn't think admitting he was mostly convinced would do him any harm, except maybe to his pride. Lucky for Leng, he wasn't above admitting he'd probably been wrong, if it would maybe help him find answers to the questions that plagued his thoughts.

"I can admit to the possibility," he said slowly, with a sigh. "I feel different, in very minor, subtle ways, and it's probable that I was being affected by an outside force, but I'm not going to just give in and tell you everything you want to know. I still think it's possible that you are trying to brainwash me."Leng's eyes flew open and he studied her carefully. "Are you?"

Shepard's voice was steady and confident. Her eyes never wavered. "No, I'm not, although if I had the means to do so, I might try it, given the opportunity. There's a lot at stake here. You have information I need. Wrestling the Illusive Man and Cerberus out of the Reaper's control would be a great boon to the war effort. It would be nice not to have to fight my battles on two fronts all the time. Do you think you could conceive of helping the Alliance fight the Reapers, instead of hampering our efforts?"

Leng felt the intensity of her gaze, the mood turning suddenly from playful to deadly earnest. He looked away, considering her question.

Could he? He hated the Alliance, and everything it stood for, but he was logical enough to see the facts for what they were. Divided, humanity and all the other sentient life in the Milky Way would fall. He didn't care so much about the other races, but he did care about his own kind.

The Illusive Man said that humanity's destiny was to control the reaper threat and bend the powerful machines to his will, making mankind the new powerhouse force in all of known space. It was an ambitious endeavor. If Shepard was right, though, it was a hopeless pipe dream, planted in their minds by very enemy they sought to control. If Shepard was right, it was a masterful stroke of manipulation by the greatest threat any of them had ever faced. It was just the kind of thing you'd expect from sentient machines that had been destroying life in 50,000 year cycles for god only knew how long.

It galled him to admit she was right, but he would be foolish to hold to his arrogant delusions. He could not, would not, betray the Illusive Man, but if Shepard was right, then perhaps he could use this woman to help his boss, just as she'd used Cerberus to stop the Collectors.

After what seemed like forever, the train of his thoughts reached its final destination. Kai looked back to Shepard, his face calm and his eyes serious. "If you're right about the Illusive Man being indoctrinated, then it's my job to help break him out of their influence. The reapers are a threat to us all, and they need to be stopped."

Shepard nodded slowly. It wasn't the resounding yes she'd been hoping for, but it was progress. She could work with progress.

The vindictive side of Kai Leng saw the flicker of triumph in her gaze and felt the sudden need to take something back from her, to not let her walk away with a total victory. After all, it was his turn to ask a question.

"Do you think your parents would have approved of you fucking a lizard?" He asked the question with such casual thoughtlessness that Shepard had to replay the words in her mind to make sure she'd heard what she thought she'd heard.

Leng watched as her eyes darkened and her forehead wrinkled into a frown. Her jaw tightened and she glared hatefully into his face, never looking away. When she spoke, it was in that low, dangerous voice she had used with him so many times before.

"I don't suppose that matters one way or the either, since my parents are dead."

"Right, I was just curious. I think I remember reading somewhere that your family was pretty religious. I just wondered how bestiality fit into their ideology. Most god-fearing types tend to frown on that sort of behavior, don't they?"

Shepard forced her face to go blank, sliding her expressionless mask on with practiced ease. "That's two questions." She eyed him and he had the distinct impression she was looking for weaknesses, searching out his emotional chinks, in order to reap her verbal vengeance. "What happened to you to make you hate other races so much?"

Her voice carried just enough pity mixed in with the anger to cut him deeply and make his lip twitch with disdain. He didn't want to play this game anymore. He was saved from having to find a way to express his displeasure, however, when the dense silence between them was sliced by a voice from above.

"Commander, we're about 20 minutes out." The voice of the pilot echoed hollowly in the small room.

"Thanks, Joker," Shepard said in her normal "Commander" voice. She stood slowly and walked to the door. "Sit tight. I'll be back for you when the station's clear." The doors opened and she stepped out. The doors closed, and, for just a minute, he was alone.

* * *

Shepard took almost everyone with her to clear out the base. Liara, EDI, and Tali were on security detail. With EDI's help they had no trouble hacking the station's VI program and faking their authorization. From there it was just a matter of finding the central security terminal and shutting down the defensive mechs that had overrun the place.

It only took Shepard, Javik, and Kaidan three hours to shoot their way into the heart of the station where the terminal could be found. By then, there were hardly any mechs left to be shut down. Exhausted and frustrated, Shepard had made a miscalculation as they were trying to breech the central lab. She'd failed to check a downed mech, and it had put three slugs through her shields and into her back just below her right shoulder blade. She managed to grit her teeth and keep firing her particle rifle until the last of the robots was down and Kaidan and Javik had entered the room, the prothean moving quickly to check the door on the opposite side and Kaidan working on the security console.

Once the remaining threat had been shut down, Shepard had collapsed against a wall and let the pain and anger wash away as she fainted from the trauma and blood loss.

Kaidan, who had been doing a system's diagnostic at the security terminal, heard her go down and was at her side in an instant.

"Shepard!" He shouted, trying to lift her head and shake her awake. He linked his omni-tool with her suits vital readings. Her blood pressure was low, but she still had a slow steady pulse. Her O2 stats were low, and her breathing seemed strained and irregular.

With one hand around her waist he sat her up against the wall, gently, trying to assess what was wrong. When he pulled his arm back and found his gauntlet streaked with her blood, his face went pale with panic. "Joker, I need medical here now! The mechs are down, but so is Shepard."

Joker's voice in his helmet was terse but controlled. "Copy that, Major, they're headed your way."

Alenko rolled Shepard onto her stomach and began applying med-gel to the open wound. Only one of the slugs had gone through her armor, but the other two had made deep depressions in her armor plating and were likely keeping her chest from expanding fully.

"Javik! Help me get her armor off!" Kaidan's voice stayed a few notches below hysterical. He forced himself to breath and focus on the buckles on her chest plate. He got them off on only the second try and then Javik was there and his three-fingered hands were steady. They quickly had her torso free of the hard outer-plating of her armor.

Shepard gasped for air as soon as she was able to take a full, deep breath, and then winced in pain as the skin and muscles of her wound protested.

"Ow," she said as her eyes flickered open.

"Don't move," Kaidan said, his arm around her shoulders keeping her in a sitting position away from the wall. "Chakwas is on her way."

"I'm fine, Kaidan, just help me up."

"Shepard, you need to stay still, you've been shot."

"Wouldn't be the first time," she muttered grumpily. "I can walk. We can meet them halfway. I'll be okay."

Kaidan leaned around her and dubiously eyed the bloody hole in the mesh of her under armor. The medi-gel he'd applied had stopped the bleeding, for now.

"Here, I can carry you," the Major offered, sliding his right arm under her knees. His face was tight with worry as he lifted her from the floor. "Javik, can you get her chest plate?"

"Put me down, Major, I can stand on my own." Shepard's voice was a hoarse growl, and she began coughing. There was a wet gurgle and splash of blood on Kaidan's chest.

Shepard blinked dazedly as she tasted copper and felt the thick flood in her mouth. She coughed some more, gasping as she managed to temporarily clear her air way. Her head was swimming dizzily as Kaidan began to run. She rescinded her stubborn order silently and leaned her head against Alenko's shoulder. Then everything faded to black.

**AN: I know, I know, this cliff hanger thing is becoming a habit. I just want to make sure you all keep coming back for more. It may be petty, it may be cheap, but hey, if it works… lol. Some of you may have noticed that I raised the rating, as well. I apologize to those of you that don't like the M rating. For now, it's just because of language. Apparently, in my head Kai Leng has quite the potty mouth. Also, I never know where to draw the line with the violence and what not, so… just to be safe, M it is. Again, my apologies. I promise I will forewarn you of any other M type content that may happen.**

**That said, onto happier things. I just want to thank all of those that have reviewed and followed and like this story so far, especially N7Tenshei, my ever faithful reviewer and kindred spirit. I just want you all to know how much I appreciate you reading my stuff. Till next time!**


	13. Chapter 12

**AN: Warning for language again, as well as some dirty thoughts, n'such. Nothing too explicit. Yet. **

**Disclaimer: Mass Effect ain't mine.**

Chapter 12

Kai Leng was sitting on his regular bed in the med-bay, trying to read, under the watchful gaze of Lieutenant James Vega when they carried Shepard in. He sat there, data pad in hand, as they laid her on the bed across from him. At first he was shocked numb. Then his mind spun into action, working through possible outcomes, and strategies. What would happen to him if Shepard was killed? He eyed the Major hovering at Shepard's side with concern and desperation written all over his face. The man had been shooting him angry and disapproving glances since Kai had been brought aboard the Normandy, though the Major's eyes didn't leave the Commander now.

Would he be turned over to the Alliance Command, or simply executed? As much as he disliked his current situation it was still preferable to either of those options. Then again, Shepard was not only the enemy, she was a great threat to him and to Cerberus. Perhaps it would be worth his life if he could take her out. He believed in Cerberus, and its underlying cause, and ultimately he knew he was only worth the results that he could bring to the cause. He himself was an expendable asset. He not only knew this, but understood it on a level so deep that he had never given any thought to his life or future beyond his current mission.

That didn't mean, however, that he wanted to throw his life away for nothing, or that he wouldn't fight for his survival. If he was going to try and take out Shepard he'd better make damned sure he succeeded.

On the other hand, there was the whole Reaper threat and possible indoctrination of his fellows to consider. If Shepard was right, it was likely he was the only one who knew about it and was in a position to do anything about it, with Shepard's help, of course. That thought drove a spike of anger through his gut and he had to force himself to relax his fingers on the data pad.

Leng's tank of a watchdog had apparently noticed the tension of his emotional burst and had tensed as well. The mohawked marine looked half a second from reaching across the bed and ripping Kai's head from his shoulders.

Kai made sure to lean against the wall, resuming his relaxed posture, though his eyes continued to watch the progress happening on the other side of the med bay. Shepard had been laid out on her left side with a bloody intubation tube was protruding from her mouth. Dr. Chakwas used a wicked looking pair of scissors to slice down both sides of her under armor before peeling the back of her suit down to her waist. Major Alenko supported her head as doctor began scanning Shepard's now exposed back. The skin around her right shoulder was discolored an ugly deep purple and painted with splashes of crimson that still trickled from an ugly looking hole lower down on Shepard's right side.

"The slug penetrated between the intercostal muscles and is lodged in the inferior lobe of the right lung," Chakwas said aloud, but didn't seem to be speaking to anyone in particular. She reached inside a small drawer next to the bed a removed a small, handheld instrument with plastic bulb on one and a round hollow diode on the other. She swabbed quickly with a ready antiseptic wipe to clean the area around the wound and then placed the object over the jagged opening.

She held it flush to Shepard's back while she twisted a small ring around the center, operating the device until, with a soft sucking noise, a miniature slug plinked into the bulb. It was such a small thing, the size of a pea.

Setting the device aside, Dr. Chakwas then reached for another medical instrument, this one with a long tapered nozzle, that she inserted into the bloody hole and used to apply medi-gel internally. The clear viscous goop ran from the opening, overflowing slightly, at which point, the doctor removed the applicator and wiped away the excess with a new antiseptic swap.

Leng schooled his face into giving no reaction as the medical officer quickly cut down the sleeves and legs of Shepard's suit and pealed the rest of the thing off of her, leaving the injured Commander in her plain Alliance issue underwear. The bra, too, was quickly cut off as Chakwas quickly and efficiently continued to clean the blood from Shepard's skin, and then began to apply gauze to the wound, wrapping strips of the sterile bandages around Shepard's ribs and over her shoulder to hold things securing in place.

Leng found his eyes wondering of their own accord over the pale expanse of Shepard's naked skin, the toned curve of her shoulder, the delicate notch at the base of her throat, the sensual line of her clavicle, the solid orbs of her softly peaked breasts that slowly disappeared under the binding of bandages, the sheet of taunt, muscled abs that were impressive, yet feminine, and the perfect curve of her hips…

His view was suddenly blocked as the large Lieutenant stepped around to the end of Kai's bed, between him and the Commander. Leng's eyes shot up to Vega's and he was delighted to see barely restrained fury bubbling under the man's eyes.

The Cerberus agent let a licentious smirk grace his face, for the Lieutenant's benefit. The pop of Vega's knuckles was heard even over Chakwas' orders for the Major to lay the commander gently on her back and grab her one of the blankets stashed in one of the cabinets.

Leng gave Vega one more knowing grin and then went back to trying to read the data pad. It was an annotated version of "To Kill a Mockingbird". When Dr. Chakwas had offered him reading material it had been either that or a translation of Salarian poetry.

He wondered if this was the doctor's idea of a sick joke, or if maybe she was trying to teach him a lesson of some kind. Either way he wasn't rising to the bait. He let his eyes drift over the words, and tried hacking the data pad anytime his marine watchdog's eyes weren't on him. So far he'd had no luck. He didn't have his omni-tool, and the short intermittent bursts of manual hacking were proving ineffective, so far. He would keep trying.

Having gotten Shepard patched up and tucked in, an IV of RBC's and plasma was now hooked up to her right arm, Karin Chakwas began shooing people out of the med-bay. Several of Shepard's people had gathered in the room during her treatment, but now they were being forced back through the double doors by the sheer force of will, and matronly determination the silver haired woman had gained over years of service aboard starships.

The tall blood smeared major proved the most resistant, but, in the end, even he was moved by a few curt words.

"I know you want to sit her and hold her hand until she gets up and around, but you know the Commander would kick your ass from here to the Citadel and back again if you don't get that station ready while she'd down." Chakwas scolded, waving her hand meaningfully at the unconscious woman.

Alenko laughed bitterly. "That's true. All right then, but you let me know the second she wakes up."

Chakwas nodded in agreement and pointed meaningfully at the door.

Once Kaidan was gone, taking only one worry filled glance back, Chakwas turned to Leng and Vega.

"I'm stuck watching him," James said hastily, his hands up in defense.

"Oh, yes, I'm aware of that, Lieutenant. Make sure he stays on that bed. I don't want him getting overly ambitious, on account of our Commander and her current vulnerability." The doctor narrowed her eyes suspiciously at Leng, and he felt certain any slack he'd had on account of her guilt was used up.

Kai innocently turned his eyes back to the data pad and ignored them both. If there was one thing Leng was good at, it was biding his time, and waiting for the perfect moment to strike. He could wait.

* * *

The first thing that Shepard became aware of was the tightness of the bandages around her chest. She tried to take a deep breath, but found her mouth and throat blocked by… something. She was choking. She couldn't breathe. She couldn't get any air. She was going to die. Again.

Everything around her was blackness and panic, just like the last time. She was moving in slow motion as she reached up to her face and grasped at the thing that was latched on over her mouth, some creature that was sucking her life away.

There was a far off noise and then something locked around her wrist and forced her arm back down. Pain stabbed through her arm, radiating up and down from the crook of her elbow. She lifted her left arm, only to find it also pressed down to her side. The noise continued, drawing nearer, but still indiscernible.

She struggled momentarily and then noticed her energy seemed to be leaking away quickly as she felt her chest burning for air and her throat clenching spasmodically. She was pain, red-hot and burning from head to toe. She knew she'd be seeing spots if there was any light anywhere, but it was so dark! Last time she had died there had at least been stars and the halo of atmo burn around her. Even the fiery ruins of her ship had provided some distraction from her impending doom. Now there was only darkness and the noise. What the hell was that noise? It hammered at her skull and made her brain ache.

She focused on that noise, lifeline that it was; it was the only thing that seemed to penetrate the depths of her demise.

Then, suddenly, it was a voice, deep and booming.

"Shepard!"

Someone was calling her name. Someone she recognized.

Vega.

"Shepard, it's okay, you're okay, just relax and breathe," His voice was a deliberate and restrained with forced calm. What was Vega doing out here in the dark?

Her consciousness focused and she realized she still had her eyes closed. Heavy as they were it took all her concentration to force her eyelids up. There was a flash of blinding white, and she closed them again. The pain in her brain had multiplied exponentially. The tightness in her chest increased as well, but with a desperate gasp she realized she could breathe.

It seemed only a trickle, but the feel of cool, life-giving air trickling into her lungs she allowed her body to go limp. She focused on her diaphragm, on drawing air in and out slowly. It didn't seem like enough, never enough, but she was still there, still conscious, still alive.

Her panic receded, and she attempted to open her eyes once again. It took her a few squinting blinks, but eventually she was looking up at Lieutenant Vega and Dr. Chakwas, their faces sharpening into clarity from hazy blobs of color as she was able to focus and blink away the buildup of tears.

She looked back and forth between the two people staring down at her with worry evident in their expressions. She nodded once at Dr. Chakwas and the older woman nodded back, the tension in her shoulders easing somewhat.

Karin raised her omni-tool and began to scan Shepard slowly, focusing on her chest and shoulders. After a minute the woman's silver brow's lifted in surprise.

"That can't be right…" She muttered and walked around to the other side of the bed, gently nudging Vega out of the way.

Shepard felt a crease form between her own brows, and wished she could speak. The breathing tube down her throat was intensely uncomfortable.

Eventually, the doctor lowered her tool and leaned over the Commander.

"I'm going to remove the intubation tube now, Shepard. This will be unpleasant."

Chakwas reached up and began removing the adhesive strips that kept the thing on her face and down her wind pipe. Next she raised the virtual display on the mouth piece and entered a few quick commands. Trying to focus in on what was happening right over her mouth made the ache in her head throb dangerously and she closed her eyes, just as she felt a slithering retraction in her chest, as though she'd swallowed a nest of baby snakes that now sought their freedom.

She gagged and chocked as the thing was pulled off, its retraction competed. She began to cough, feeling a thick phlegmy mess in her chest. She sat up and rolled to her side, and the experienced physician had an empty pan there to catch the results of her hacking.

"Gently, Shepard, gently," Chakwas crooned, a comforting hand on Raina's shoulder.

If she'd had the energy, Shepard would have rolled her eyes. As it was, she finished clearing her airway of a thick, pink slime before falling back, exhausted on her bed.

Despite her fatigue, the first clear breath of air had her lips curling up in a drowsy smile. Oxygen was good.

"I'm really sorry about that, Commander," Chakwas said as she carried the pan over to the lab bench on Shepard's left. "I had to intubate you because of the blood in your lungs. I had expected you to be under for another day or two, at least, and I would have removed the apparatus while you were still unconscious. Seems I've highly underestimated your bodies accelerated healing process."

Shepard nodded slowly and pulled her hands up to rest them on her stomach. "How long have I been out?"

"Just under seven hours," Chakwas answered. The implication in her voice was a perfect underline to the lift of Shepard's eyebrows.

"It can't have been that bad, then," the question in Shepard's voice clear to all.

"It was bad enough," was all the doctor would say for the moment.

Shepard watched as the Medical Officer took samples and disposed of the rest of the disgusting mess in the metal pan. The Commander grimaced and pushed herself to a sitting position.

Vega was next to her in a flash, helping support her as he spoke for the first time since she'd come fully awake. "Careful, Commander, you've got quite hole in your back."

Shepard grunted and let him assist her, but then pulled away from him once she was upright. "Thanks, James, but I'm fine."

Vega's face creased with indignation as he crossed his arms over his chest. "You damn well are NOT fine, Commander. With all due respect, we almost lost you last night."

Shepard was preparing a retort when Dr. Chakwas saved her from the exertion.

"That will be quite enough, Lieutenant." She walked back over to Shepard's bed, her eyes on the other of the room. "Aren't you supposed to be watching Leng?"

"He's still asleep," Vega said with a defensive shrug.

"I wouldn't be so sure," Chakwas said as she signaled Shepard to lean forward.

James glanced over at the prisoner, eyeing his slack face and his slow even breathing. He still thought Leng looked asleep, but it wouldn't do to let his guard down, especially with the Commander out of commission like she was. "Aye, Aye, ma'am," Vega saluted and walked back over to stand next to Leng's bed. His replacement would be here in a few minutes, and then he could worry about the Commander.

Chakwas gently began loosening the bandages around Shepard's chest, so that Shepard was forced to pull the sheet up to her shoulders or risk exposing her breasts as the meager covering began to relax and sag to her waist.

Chakwas got down to the gauze pad, and took a deep breath before lifting the corner carefully. Underneath was a small, roundish scab. It looked days old. Her breath escaped her in an explosive burst and she pulled the pad away. "Amazing," she sighed, removing the rest of Shepard's bandages. "I want to take some internal images, to verify what my scans are showing."

"Aren't you going to by me dinner first, doc?" Shepard said, clutching the sheets to her now bare chest and taking a deep breath to fill her newly unrestricted lungs. There was a tight, burning ache from her shoulder blade to her kidney on the right side of her back, and a small hitch in her breathing as her lungs reached capacity, but that was all. Well, that and the lightheadedness.

"I don't suppose some clothes are on the menu?" the Commander asked, her voice carefully steady.

"Images first, Commander, then clothes, and I want to you stay in bed for the next twenty four hours, just to make sure…"

Karin was cut off as Shepard shook her head and gave a curt "no".

"If the images confirm I'm not going to bleed out into my lungs, then I have work to do." When the good doctor looked about to argue, Shepard gave her a stern frown. "I'll do my best to stay out of trouble. The station is clear now, and I won't be doing any battle maneuvers anytime soon. I'll take it east, doc, but I have things I have to take care of."

Karin frowned back at Shepard, just as sternly, but gave a hesitant nod at last. "Alright. Major Alenko has been overseeing the setup on Lazarus station. With Tali and EDI's help, he should have things well under way, but I know how you are about wanting to double and quadruple check everything, so I won't forbid you from going, on the condition that you don't do any heavy lifting, and that you have someone with you at all times, just in case something relapses. You may think you've got super powers, and you may very well have some non-standard enhancements, but you are still human, dammit!"

"Sure, Karin, I wouldn't dream of saying otherwise." She gave the Chief Medical a reassuring smile, but there was a certain sad slant to her eyes that said she wasn't quite convinced herself.

"Alright, and I want you checking in with me every three hours, or I'm going to hunt you down, Shepard." Chakwas knew how to pick her battles, and when she was beaten.

"Sure, now, if you please, I think I'm ready for my close up." Shepard's wry smile almost reached her eyes.

* * *

Kai Leng stood under the pounding spray and nearly groaned. He couldn't remember the last time he'd had a real shower. Hygienic aerosols got you clean and kept you from smelling, but he always felt like they left a powdery coat on his skin and hair. He dealt with it, ignored it, even, because when you were out on a mission, or traveling in tight quarters, they were a necessity. They just didn't compare to a real shower, though. Not at all.

He hadn't been allowed to shower on the Normandy, for some reason that he had yet to figure out, but now that he was locked down in real quarters on the Lazarus station, he was afforded this little luxury. He supposed Shepard was trying to butter him up.

The thing was he was still shackled, though the length of cable between his wrists was now sixteen inches instead of eight, and he still had a guard, standing watch on the other side of the half wall. His new "room" was small, only ten by ten with a single cot, toilet facilities and fold down sink. The data pad had been confiscated when Dr. Chakwas had discovered he'd been trying to use it to try and hack into the Normandy's archives, and they had yet to give him anything else to keep him entertained while Shepard dealt with matters elsewhere.

He just had to wait. At least they were letting him take a shower, with real shampoo and body soap, no less. It almost made up for the total lack of privacy and the prison like living conditions. Still, it was better than he expected. Probably better than he deserved, too.

"Two more minutes, fuck-wad." It was the same marine from his first interrogation, the charming one with the mouth of a real sailor.

Leng ignored him and continued to enjoy the feel of the water as he rinsed the suds from his neck and shoulders. He wondered when he would get another chance to mess with Shepard. He recalled the way her eyes had flashed dangerously when he'd brought up her parents and her dead lover. She really did have beautiful eyes. And those breasts!

He'd only had a few seconds to look them over before that Neanderthal Lieutenant had ruined his view, but gods, where they fantastic. Firm and perfectly shaped and larger then you could tell when she wore body armor or those unflattering uniform shirts. He just wanted to…

'Shit!' Leng thought as he realized where his thoughts had been moving. He wanted to thrust his sword right between those perfect breasts and call it good. He wanted to kill Shepard, not fuck her.

Kai looked down at his rock hard erection and scowled deeply. This was not the time to be imaging Shepard with those perfect breasts down on her knees, her hair a wet tangle around her face as she sucked his…

'Fuck!' he was doing it again. What the hell was wrong with him? He'd never been one to let his dick to his thinking. He had always had the discipline to put baser needs in their place. He could enjoy sex with the right woman, when the time and place was right and forget all about it ten minutes later, moving on to the next mission, the next space port.

He chose when and where to indulge, not his cock.

"Times up, sweetheart, shut it down." The voice of the marine jolted him from his thoughts like a splash of ice water in his face.

Ice water!

Leng flipped the water from hot to cold, turning to glance defiantly at the man who waited for his orders to be obeyed. Between an eyeful of his scowling guard and the blast of freezing water, his libido and his dick were once again at ease.

He turned the water off then and reached for the towel sitting folded on the half wall. He gave his hair a quick ruffle, and then wrapped the towel around his waist. When he walked forward ready to leave, the guard glared at him and put up a hand.

"Not so fast, princess, you get dressed here."

Leng glanced over his should at his discarded suit, lying across a long bench that ran along one wall.

"I guess clean clothes are too much to ask for," he frowned at the man's petty cruelty, but walked over and picked up the suit. He stepped back behind the wall and quickly dried off before putting the suit back on. It clung uncomfortably to his skin and smelled of the vague non-smell of the hygienic spray he'd had to use since his capture.

"Not yet, they said new clothes are coming, maybe tomorrow. Then you can show off your pretty new dress for all the other ladies down at the club," drawled the marine. "Hurry it up, let's go."

Leng's frown shifted from irritated to thoughtful. Surely there were lots of these Alliance standard-issue under-armor suits on an Alliance military vessel? Unless there was something special about this particular suit?

He had to work for a second to get the zipper up the back all the way, but he wasn't about to ask for help. Still, as much as he loathed all marines, and this marine in particular, he might have to thank this man for the valuable bit of info he'd just let slip. He'd thank him, alright, just before he slit his throat.

* * *

There was a soft ping from her omni-tool. Shepard lifted her head off her desk, wiping her hand over her chin to remove a thin line of drool. After a second to get her bearings, Shepard opened her tool and read the new incoming message.

_Shepard,_

_I found what I think you were looking for. Come see me as soon as you have a free minute._

_Liara_

Shepard stood quickly, wincing only slightly when the injury in her back pulled sharply. She took a deep, slow breath and forced herself to walk slowly to the elevator. When she arrived on deck three she walked just as slowly along the hall, passed the mess, and up to Liara's door. She stepped through the doors and walked over to Liara, hunched as usually over her Shadow Broker terminal.

Upon hearing her doors open, the asari looked up, a bit surprised. "Shepard! That was rather fast. I thought you'd be asleep by now."

It was rather late, Shepard saw, and it had been a long day, for everyone.

"Not quite, you said you found something?" All her manners were tossed aside in her poorly suppressed eagerness.

Liara smiled slightly and nodded, indicating one of her many screens. "More like I found some_one_," Liara admitted. "I wasn't able to reach any of my contacts on Earth. The communications in the Sol System are pretty much wiped out at this point, but I tried some contacts of mine on the colony world Xīnshēng. The population is almost entirely made up of settlers from Asia Majoris, and I was lucky enough to get a hit on Leng's picture. I received this message from a Tung Min. Mrs. Tung says Kai Leng is her nephew, but she says his name is Lóng Dāi. She uses the traditional pronunciation of surname first, but if she's right then…"

"Then Kai's name is really Dāi. Not really very creative on his part, I'd say." Shepard scoffed, sensing victory on the horizon.

"That's just it,"Liara whispered, a shade of sadness to her tone. "In Chinese, Kai is a commonly used name for boys that translates roughly into "triumphant". Whereas Dāi is not really a name at all. This particular pronunciation has several possible meanings, all of them bad. Roughly translated it can mean cursed, stupid, vicious, depraved or wicked. It's a terrible name for a mother to give their child. I can see why he'd want to change it."

Shepard shook her head. "Sounds like his mother had it right."

Liara frowned at the Commander reprovingly. "Maybe he's earned it now, but can you imagine, being called that by your parents as a young kid?"

Shepard frowned thoughtfully. What would it be like, being given a name from birth that was so demeaning and negative? It was a harrowing thought, and maybe it explained a few things about their captive.

"What else did she say?" asked Shepard, trying to change the subject.

"Well, she sent me her vid-com address, if you want, I can set you up with an interview." Liara suggested.

"Do it, ASAP."

Liara raised an eyebrow and glanced not so subtly at the clock on her computer terminal.

"First thing in the morning then," Shepard sighed, defeated.

"Sounds good, Shepard. See you in the morning, then. You should get some rest."

"Thanks, I'll try," Shepard growled with an eye roll as she turned and made her way to the elevator. Truth be told, she was exhausted. What little adrenaline she'd gotten from her excitement of Liara's news was gone now. She would sleep now and in the morning, she would have her answers.

**AN: Okay, so hopefully this moved a little faster for you all. I know things are sort of taking their time, trust me, when I began this story I had no intention of dragging it out like this, but I promise we are getting there, and I think all these little scenes are important. Mostly. Next time on SFtD: We get to meet Kai's (or Dāi's) Aunt and learn about his back story according to moi. Also, we get to see Shepard's issues and dark side take a front row seat as her next chat with our devious assassin and things will get… interesting, so tune in next week!**

**On a different note, I'm considering working up a soundtrack for this story. It's something I've seen others do to varying degrees of success. I think music can really make the emotions of a story more vibrant, or it can just be a distraction. Let me know what you guys think! Yay or nay on the soundtrack? Format ideas or song suggestions, or examples of good playlists that you've seen? I'm all eyes. Thanks again to my faithful readers and those that have taken time to leave their wonderful and helpful reviews. You guys rock!**


	14. Chapter 13

**AN: Sorry, it's going to be a long one, but there are just a couple of things I feel I need to say. **

**First, I'm not a neurologist, doctor, or psychologist. Everything I learned about the limbic system I learned from google. I don't know if there are any neurologists, doctors, or psychologists reading this story, but if you are, and my science fictioning doesn't actually make sense, then I apologize. I always thought that was the fun part of writing science fiction. Make it sound good and normal people will buy anything. No offence to normal people, I'm the same way.**

**Second, I don't speak/understand Chinese, Mandarin, or any other languages spoken on the Asian continent. (I used to know a little Russian, but aside from Hello I've mostly forgotten that, too.) Therefore, all my translations for the Chinese used in my story also come from google. To anyone who actually knows something of the language I first want to apologize for any wacky translations, and secondly, ask for any help you think I need in that area.**

**Third, I really STRUGGLED with this chapter, which is why it's sort of late. For the first part of the story, I chose to write it the way I did, because I felt these little glimpse were important for character stuff, if not totally plot relevant (although some of it is), but I didn't want to spend tons of time on it, which is why it's sort of tell not show. That is on purpose. I just sort of envisioned a long, panning camera shot, from person to person, narrated perhaps, by Joker, who is flipping through surveillance channels looking for something good to watch and giving a discourse on human nature to EDI. Not really, though, because Joker can't see into peoples thoughts and dreams. (Or can he?)**

**Disclaimer: I'm poor. I don't even own my car. I certainly don't own Mass Effect.**

Chapter 13

It was a very long night for everyone.

Liara, who seldom slept at all anymore, who hadn't slept a night through since Thessia, had spent the night working with EDI, who never slept, for obvious reasons. Together they managed to infiltrate the rest of the security protected information in the Lazarus station's top secret archive files, which gave them a whole new list of names, places and security protocols which they then turned to using to reach deeper into the Cerberus information network.

When she met with Commander Shepard in the morning, the Shadow Broker would have another stack of files on their prisoner and his missions while under Cerberus. She also made a note to get ahold of Kahlee Sanders and interview her about her encounters with the Cerberus agent. Of all the people that had ever come up against Leng, less than a hand full had lived to tell about it, and since Admiral Anderson was a bit hard to pin down at the moment, his close associate Miss Sanders seemed the next best choice. It would also be a great opportunity for her to check in with the Crucible team and found out how things were going on that end with the Sanctuary Research.

She was glad for the work, glad to keep busy.

* * *

Kaidan, finally off duty, was sitting at the small bar in the port obs deck working on his newly cracked bottle of Peruvian Whiskey. He clinked his glass against the bottle in mock toast. When Shepard had given him the gift he'd thought, maybe, things weren't ruined between them, after all. He'd been so pissed about her and Cerberus back on Horizon. Pissed, and hurt that she was alive and she hadn't thought him important enough to get a hold of, to let him know she was alive.

Afterwards he'd gone to Anderson to demand answers, but what he'd been told just made him angrier, this time with himself. And with Cerberus and the Alliance and the Council. He'd just been mad at life and the universe for a while.

When she turned herself in after Aratoht he'd been too angry and afraid to go see her. He'd done what he could behind the scenes to help her case with the tribunal, making sworn statements about the Reapers and vouching for her character, but he knew it wasn't enough.

After the Reapers hit Earth his emotions had been in such an uproar, he'd acted like such an idiot on Mars. Thinking back now, it seemed like his injuries there were a mixed blessing. It gave him time to think, time to consider what was really important to him. He'd thought, he'd hoped, that it had been the same with Shepard.

When she'd come to see him he'd seen the worry in her eyes. She thought she was so good at hiding her emotions, but he could see them. He used to be able to read her like a book.

During the Cerberus attack on the Citidel, he'd been startled to find Shepard there, and pointing a gun at him. Again, he'd felt that flicker of doubt. It had all seemed too coincidental, but after he'd had a second to think, to see the pleading desperation in Shepard's eyes he'd known he had to make the choice. Did he trust Shepard? Turned out, he did. He'd turned his gun on Udina and hadn't regretted it for second.

He knew things were a mess between them, he did, but he'd felt a ray of hope when she'd invited him back aboard. His heart had been beating so hard when she'd reached out a hand to him, and he'd hoped that had been some kind of symbol. She'd invited him back on her ship. He'd half believed it was also an invitation back into her life as well.

The thing he'd realized, staring down the barrel of his gun into her eyes, that there wasn't anything more important to him then she was. He would have tossed aside honor, and duty, even loyalty for her, had she asked. Of course she hadn't asked. She would never ask him to do that. It was part of why he loved her so much. She understood the things that made him tick. She forgave him for being a self-righteous ass. He thought she had, anyway.

That was before she'd yelled at him, earlier.

When he'd finally worked up the guts to ask about "them" she'd told him she needed time to think. He thought he'd understood that. They were, after all, at war. There were more important things then the two of them to consider. He'd backed off, given her space and worked on winning this war. He'd waited, and waited, and she'd just pushed him farther away. He had started wondering if one of them would be dead before he could tell her he loved her. Then she'd been shot.

Holding her in his arms with her blood smeared across his chest had just brought it all back. Those two years when he'd thought her dead, all the pain and the loss. It had been everything in him to keep it together to get her back to the ship.

He had, and Dr. Chakwas had said she would be fine.

Apparently, the doctor had been right.

Chakwas had called him just as he was getting back to the ship. He'd worked all through that night, knowing he wouldn't be able to sleep until he knew Shepard was up and around. He'd been on his way to med-bay anyway, but Karin had informed him that Shepard wasn't there any longer.

He'd found her in her quarters getting dressed for duty.

"What the hell do you think you are doing, Raina? You should be in bed. Better yet, you should still be down in med bay." He'd tried to keep the frustration and worry out of his voice. He'd failed.

"I appreciate your concern, Kaidan, but I'm fine. Dr. Chakwas says my wound is healed enough to be back to work, provided I take it easy on the heavy lifting. I have a lot to do, and I can't afford to stay in bed when I'm fine." She'd been working on the last of the snaps and buttons when she'd called for him to enter, and now she sat down and began pulling on her boots.

He'd knelt in front of her and told her she wasn't fine, that he'd been watching her cough up blood not ten hours earlier and it wasn't safe for her to push herself.

She'd pulled her hands away when he tried to grab them and refused to look him in the eye.

She'd insisted she was fine, that he could check with Chakwas if he didn't believe her.

He'd said it wasn't a matter of believing her, but that he knew she would require things of herself that she'd never ask of anyone else.

She told him to mind his own business.

He'd told her to quit being such a stubborn, hypocritical idiot.

She'd pulled rank and told him to leave.

Needless to say it hadn't gone well, and he'd spent the rest of the day in a pain filled haze, trying to forget that look and focus on the work. He had made a mess of things, while trying to get his emotions under control. He'd yelled at three people, including Tali, who didn't deserve it.

He tossed back his head and down the rest of his whiskey, then reached to pour himself another glass. The worst thing had been her eyes. He'd expected anger, or irritation, he'd even have taken that burning rage that said she was about to pull her gun and blast him to hell. At least then he'd know she felt something for him.

Her eyes had been completely empty.

Major Kaidan Alenko put his glass to his lips and drank deeply, the burning as the whiskey whispered down his throat was a heavenly pleasure compared to the fire in his chest, the one burning where his heart used to be.

* * *

Lieutenant Vega was back on duty guarding the Cerberus Prisoner. He didn't really mind guard duty, except for the fact that it was infinitely boring, and he much rather be cleaning his armor or modding his shotgun. Or working out. Or sleeping. Ah hell, who was he trying to kid? He hated guard duty, but he tried to look on the bright side. At least Shepard trusted him to keep el bastardo peligroso under wraps.

He was just thought they'd be better off if they'd space the guy pronto and get back to fighting the reapers.

Even he could tell Shepard was different since they brought caught the cabrón on Horizon. She was distracted, somehow, more intense, sure but there was something else. She just seemed more… well he wasn't sure what, but it bothered him. She'd been shot in the back by a downed mech. That was a rookie mistake, one he'd never have believed her capable of if he hadn't seen it for himself, hadn't watched the doc pull the slug out of her back personally.

That had been right before he'd caught the prisoner with his filthy, murdering eyes all over the Commander's exposed chest. Even now he wanted to wring the guy's neck and beat his face into his own toilet. That puta madre did not get to look at the Commander that way. Not ever.

James glared evilly through the reinforced plexi-glass window that ran the length of the door to the make shift cell. He thought it was pretty lucky for Leng that he was asleep.

There was a scuffle from the ceiling overhead, and thump, and then a muffled curse. Vega tensed and reached for his side arm. Before he got his pistol off his hip, he recognized the soft, high pitched voice.

"Sparks, is that you?" Vega called, looking up with an amused half smile, though his hand was still on his gun.

"James?" The question was followed by quiet knocking just to his left.

"Yeah, that's me," Vega replied walking over and knocking back. "What are you doing in there?" He assumed she was in the vents, since she sounded like she was crawling around.

Just then Garrus came around the corner at the end of the corridor. He trotted up to Vega and said, "Have you seen, well, heard Tali? I'm supposed to be guiding her to that storage room over there."

Tali's voice from above sounded distinctly irritated. "Vakarian! Where have you been? I've been wandering around lost up here for twenty minutes!"

Garrus winced. "Sorry, Tali, these passages don't really follow the vents; I had to make my way around several of the larger labs that were locked down for the night." He glanced at Vega and whispered, "And I may have stumbled on the armory and been…distracted for a moment or two."

"I heard that," Tali growled in her mild, quarian way. "Well, am I getting close? These schematics I got from EDI are totally inaccurate."

"Yeah, you're right outside Lieutenant Bastard Leng's cell now. You'll want to patch in the cable from there and then the new interrogation room is the next room to the left. My left. Over here," he jogged quickly down the hall and knocked loudly on the ceiling in front of the next door down. "Can you get here from where you are?"

"Just give me a second," Tali muttered grumpily. She continued to mumble to herself and Vega followed her low murmuring across the hall and then down to where Garrus had knocked.

"…Militant turian nerd… coulda ripped… half the night on my stomach… Bosh'tet Alenko…no appreciation…"

Vega's grin went ear to ear as he listened to her tirade, catching just enough to amuse the hell out him. Garrus grinned back, until, a few seconds later he snapped his fingers (Vega didn't know turians could do that) and started back down the hall. "Can you watch out for her for a minute?"

"Sure," James laughed and whispered wryly, "No problem, what's one more person to babysit."

"Are you calling me a baby?" Tali's voice was part curious, part annoyed.

"Wouldn't dream of it, babe," Vega called back, his grin still playful.

"Ridiculous human idioms, my translator must be malfunctioning again," Tali said, her words punctuated by some more thumping and another, louder sound, like drilling. That continued for another ten minutes, with Tali moving away, into the storage room, or rather above it, for several minutes and then moving back to the hallway.

There was more knocking from above, and then one of the square panels from above began to be outlined in bright light, the burr of a cutting torch echoing softly in the small spaces above and below. Just as Garrus reappeared, a collapsible ladder clenched in one fist, there was a soft sucking noise and the panel rose up and sideways, revealing a black hole, from which Tali's masked and hooded head shortly poked out.

Garrus moved to just beneath the opening and set up the ladder, which unfolded in a jerky extension of runners and rungs.

"About time," Tali grumbled grumpily.

Garrus rolled his eyes at Vega and held the ladder steady with one hand.

As the young quarian woman turned and began climbing down, though, Garrus' eyes were drawn to the slender curve of her calf, up over her knees, thighs, and finally to one of the most shapely posteriors and supportive waists, turian or not, that he'd ever seen. He'd seen them all before, of course, many times, but as they lowered from above, right in front of his face, Garrus found himself really noticing them for the first time.

Perhaps there was a way to take Shepard's advice, after all, he thought with only the smallest quiver of his mandibles.

Vega watched Tali with no less appreciation, but with far less intention. Then, as Tali replaced the panel above and began welding it back into place, Vega sighed and moved back into his position across from Leng's door. Distraction time was over.

James looked in the window again to make sure the prisoner was still there, asleep on his bunk. He was. The lieutenant thought that, with all the racket from above, it was incredibly lucky for Leng he'd been able to sleep through it.

* * *

As it turned out, Leng wasn't asleep, and he was grateful for the fact, too. Every time he drifted off, his dreams rolled in, filled with lustful images and pleasant sensations, all focused around one woman. That, in itself wasn't the issue. It was who that woman was that was driving him to frustration and contempt for his own subconscious.

Leng did not need his head filled with Commander Raina Shepard, especially if his mind insisted on her being naked and doing… all sorts of things to his dreaming self.

She was already a distracting figure, and a challenge to his skills. She was already everything that his boss had tried to make him.

All his training, his missions, even his cybernetic enhancements were an attempt at the illusive man to replace the asset that he had lost when Shepard betrayed Cerberus and turned her back on them. Leng was not unaware that the Illusive Man, though sure of his skill and competency, didn't think him an equal match for Shepard. It was something Leng was determined to prove him wrong about, though the Illusive Man had constantly held him back from their actual confrontation.

He wanted to take Shepard on, one on one, and show the Illusive Man that he was better than Shepard, in more ways than just his loyalty and dedication, that he was better in every way that that Alliance-loving traitor.

He'd pictured the battle hundreds, if not thousands of times, imagining just how he would best her, bending he to his superior will and strength and breaking her spirit before he broke her body.

Now, though, whenever he pictured facing her one on one, it wasn't violence that he gave her with his hands. He still wanted to bend her to his will, sure, but now the visions in his head were of tearing clothing and hungry mouths. He wanted her beneath him, her skin against his, her legs around him and her arms clutching him with desperation. Not in fear, but in pleasure. He could see her submission, not to his superior skill, but to his demanding needs, the need to be inside her, pushed deep and…

Leng pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes and growled softly.

There was something wrong with him.

This was not how he was wired.

Shepard had done something to him, the hazel-eyed witch.

He needed to find out what, and fix it. Then he would make her pay, Reapers or no.

* * *

Shepard, too, was tormented by dreams, though hers were of a distinctly less pleasurable quality. She was surrounded by dark, oily shapes, and dead ashy trees. She had had this dream may times, and so began searching out the fleeting form of the boy.

Instead, she came face to face with Thane. His large, dark eyes were blank, staring past her, as if not seeing her. Shepard reached for him, her arms extended, but when her fingers ran over his chest and up to his shoulders then left long, searing streaks on his scales that began eating away at him like acid, striping the flesh away in seconds.

Thane's eyes focused on her in an instant and he began to scream in pain, the sound a horrid, tearing shriek that was so alien it was more like the sound of ripping metal then something that should be coming from the throat of her lover.

She wrenched away from him, but it was too late. The melting strips quickly spread, the layers of tissue bubbling and churning in what had to be an agonizing fashion. She wanted to reach out, to stop the pain and the hurt and to comfort him, but he pulled away from her, his cries growing louder, until she had to clutch her ears in an attempt to block out the shattering sound.

She watched, in horror, as Thane was jerked away, pulled by unseen forces, up into the smoking canopy above and away. His face a mask of pain and horror, not the peaceful expression she remembered. She fell to her knees and began to cry.

Soft soothing sounds brushed aside her hair over her ear and she felt gentle hands on her back, rubbing her shoulders comfortingly.

Shepard turned to see her mother, kneeling beside her, concern creasing her brow.

"Raina, my sweet Rainy, what's wrong?" Her mother continued to look loving and worried and Shepard collapsed into her arms, sobbing as she told her mom about Thane. About how he had been there when her whole world had been sent spinning, a solid, comforting force for calm and reason. She told her mother how she had felt a strong connection to him because of his illness and his acceptance of death, because she had been dead herself and was not afraid to face death again. He understood what it was like to feel distant from the rest of life as it swirled colorful and vivacious around them, and yet not be part of it.

Raina explained how he had been pulled back to himself by her, and his amazement of her skills and her intelligence and her grace, and how they had fallen in love, in that soft, peaceful gray place between life and death.

When she was finished telling her mother about Thane, she wiped her nose on her wrist, just as she had done as a small child and looked up into her Mother's oh-so-wise eyes. They were hazel, much like her own, but with more rich browns and copper flecks mixed into a slightly darker green. She searched those eyes and asked what she longed to know.

"Was I wrong, mom? Was it wrong to love Thane?" She had never thought so, had never even paused to wonder about such a thing, until Leng had spit his venomous accusations in her face.

Her mother ran a hand down her hair to the side of her face in one comforting motion. "Oh, no, my love, no. Love is never wrong, or evil. I'm so glad you had someone in your life who could bring you comfort, when I could not be there."

Commander Shepard sighed in relief and hugged her mother tightly.

Hannah Shepard patted her daughters back softly and whispered in a low voice. "Love isn't your sin, Rainy. Hate is. Hate and murder. Those are your sins."

Raina sat back as if she'd been slapped. "What?"

Her mother let go of her and stood, stepping back until she was standing next to Shepard's father, who placed a loving arm over her shoulders and looked at Raina sadly. "It is wrong to hate, Raina. You know that, and it is wrong to kill. Don't you remember the things we taught you?" Her father's voice was filled with sorrow and disappointment. His light green eyes, soft behind his glasses, and framed by his dark hair, speckled with grey, were not accusing, but Shepard felt the accusation all the same.

"But I only kill to help save others. I'm trying to help. I'm trying to save the galaxy!" Desperation and despair both, painted her voice.

Hannah shook her head, her dark blond hair moving around her face like phantom seaweed. "That used to be true, Rainy, but now, you have so much hate. How can you say you aren't a murderer when you hate those you kill. You want them dead, do you not?"

Shepard shook her head and bowed it, fresh tears stinging her eyes. "It's not like that, it's not! I'm not!"

When she looked up again, her parents still stood there, silent and grave. Around them, other figures resolved from the inky shadows.

Wrex

Ashley

Zaeed

Samara

Thane

Kirrahe

Miranda

Some had eyes filled with pity, others with rage and disdain. Behind them, there was a wave of figures, all of them looking at her in accusation, two sets of angry red eyes burning from each face.

Batarians.

So many she had killed.

So many more yet, who would still die because of her and her choices.

She looked back at her parents, pleading with her eyes and she took a crawling step towards them.

"No, please, I don't want to be a killer. I don't want to do this anymore, please, just take me with you."

"You can't come with us," her father whispered. "You can't die."

"Because I'm needed," Shepard said with resentful fury, spitting the words she had already told herself many times.

"No." The voice that answered was cold, and not her father's or her mothers. She watched as her parents, the dead faces of her crew, and all of the batarian civilians melted away into the black, sticky, dripping shadows. This new voice was filled with alien certainty, and seemed to emanate from the very darkness around her.

"You can't die, because you're already dead."

* * *

Shepard opened her eyes, gasping deeply as she sat up straight in bed. She raised her hands to her face, feeling tears on her checks, she knew she had been crying in her sleep. That wasn't something she'd done since she'd been a teenager. She wiped her face dry and pushed back her hair.

After several calming breaths she rose from bed and began preparing for her day. She didn't care how early it was. She was done with sleep.

She showered, dressed and was down in the mess in less than fifteen minutes. Through it all, her dream stayed with her, though she tried desperately to think of other things.

She had no appetite, but managed to choke down a quick breakfast of instant oatmeal and orange juice from concentrate, not tasting a thing. Afterwards, she checked her messages from the CIC, and browsed reports of the work completed on the Lazarus station.

It seemed all her people had been working overtime to get the holding facilities ready for their prisoner. Tali had completed installation of the shielding device that would keep the Reapers from broadcasting their indoctrination signal to anyone, especially Leng, aboard the station. She had also spent several hours installing transmitters in all the rooms Leng would have access to that would help reinforce the dampening signal on his implants. His cell, the showers he would be using, the medical lab and the interrogation room were all wired to keep Leng from his full strength.

It was all they could do, for now. Chakwas had sent over two of her support staff to help with the medical lab, incase Leng needed any further medical treatment. This was supposed to be because Karin worried about further side effects from the injection he'd received, but Shepard was thinking it might be a good if she got carried away today, which she might if she wasn't able to get her emotions under control.

Luckily, she had some time. She still had a call to make.

* * *

When he got tired of lying there, trying not to sleep, Leng got up and started doing pushups. He found, as long as he focused on working his muscles, and didn't push things to the point where his cybernetics would kick in he didn't get that draining, exhausted feeling.

Try as he might to focus on the physical aspects of his work out, he kept seeing visions of Shepard beneath him, naked as he lowered his body towards the floor.

So, he rolled onto his back and did sit ups. This became increasingly uncomfortable because of his rock hard erection. He growled in frustration and sat up, turning his back to the window. He tried mediation.

Eventually, he had some success. It took every trick he'd ever learned, but, eventually, he regained control of his mind and his body.

With that done, he stood, dusted off his suit, and walked to the door. The tank with the Mohawk was standing against the opposite wall, watching him with narrowed eyes.

"I want to see Dr. Chakwas. Now," Leng said through the door.

* * *

"Mrs. Tung, I'm Commander Shepard of the SSV Normandy," Shepard said with her most professional smile. The woman she saw on the Vid screen on her personal terminal was probably in her late forties with shiny, shoulder length, dark hair and dark eyes with a pronounced epicanthic fold. Her round face gave her a very kind, pleasant look.

"Yes, Commander, I know who you are." The voice was firm and somewhat cold, with only the slightest of accents.

Shepard nodded and let her smile fade. "I appreciate your getting in touch with Dr. T'Soni regarding your nephew. This can't be easy for you, I'm sure, but any information you can give us on him will very helpful…"

Mrs. Tung cut her off then. "I don't see how digging up my nephew's past is going to help the Alliance in the war with the Reapers, Commander."

'At least she's direct' Shepard thought as she decided how much to tell the woman about Leng's recent activities.

"How much do you know about Kai Leng?" She decided to start by finding out how much she already knew.

The woman frowned slightly and shook her head. "That name means nothing to me. The man who's picture was circulating the colony, is Lóng Dāi, my sister's boy. I haven't seen him since he was fifteen, but I'm sure it's him. He ran away from home after my sister… after they had an altercation, and none of my family has seen him since. That was almost fifteen years ago. We thought he was either dead, or living on the streets somewhere."

"Have you heard of Cerberus?" Shepard asked after considering what Mrs. Tung had said.

The woman's eyes widened slightly and she took a deep breath. She then bowed her head slowly and seemed to be praying, her eyes closed and her expression schooled into blankness.

Shepard waited for a moment before saying, "Mrs. Tung?"

The woman sighed and raised her head once again to meet Shepard's eyes. "Sorry, Commander. This Cerberus is a terrorist group, yes? And I suppose my poor nephew has gotten himself tangled up with them, has he?" Shepard didn't give any sign of acknowledgment, but the woman nodded all the same as she continued. "I am saddened by this news, but not all that surprised. My sister, his mother, was a woman filled with much hatred. I had hoped the boy had escaped her poisonous influence, but when his step-father was killed… well, it does not surprise me at all."

Shepard looked into the woman's eyes and saw real sorrow. She should not have been taken back by this, but somehow, she had not expected it from this rather brisk woman. She softened her own face and voice before continuing.

"He used fraudulent documents to enlist in the Alliance when he was 16. He was honored with the Medal of Valor and received ICA training. He was an N7 after only four years of service, which is impressive, especially considering his youth. Shortly after that, however he was… in an altercation with a Krogan. The Krogan ended up dead and Kai… uh, your nephew was sentenced to prison. He was recruited there by Cerberus who managed to free him from prison and he's been working for them ever since." Shepard paused. So far everything she'd told her was basically public knowledge. After a moment's pause, she continued. "My crew and I managed to capture him alive. Cerberus has been hampering the Alliance's war effort and I need information on him to help put a stop to Cerberus."

Mrs. Tung nodded, looking at something beyond the camera on her side. "I do not like to speak ill of family, but I understand this is important. I'll tell you what I can. What do you want to know?"

Shepard didn't think requesting a list of personal weaknesses would go over very well. Instead she said, "I need to know about his past, his childhood, I guess, as far as you know. I'm trying to figure out where his anti-alien tendencies came from, and why he has sided so strongly with Cerberus. I need to know why he is the way he is, and why he does what he does. Can you help me with that?

"I suppose I can answer a few of those questions for you, though I was not as close to the boy as you may think." She sat back, conscientiously straightening the hem of her shirt, laying it flat against the fabric of her trousers. "In order to understand who Dāi is, you must first know about his mother. My sister is, or was, a rather… unpleasant woman. She was pretty, but arrogant and outspoken, and very selfish. She was my parent's youngest child and rather spoiled. They treated her much like a princess, and she often acted like one."

As it turned out, young Hai, Leng's mother, had turned her nose up at the wrong group of young men. Min didn't know the entire story, but she'd seen her sister after they'd finished with her. Nine months later a still teenage Hai had born a son. She had not wanted the child, and only the admonitions of her parents had kept her from either having an abortion or giving the baby up for adoption. She'd consented to keep him, given her parents would take over raising him.

Hai had named the boy Dāi, in protest of her parent's insistence that, given time, she would come to care for him. Little had changed for Hai, except for her deep and abiding anger at all men, and a hardening, bitter hatred inside her that turned her from an ungrateful, conceited girl into a jaded and cruel woman.

Several weeks before Dāi's third birthday, his grandparents had been killed in a hover car accident.

"I tried to help her as much as I could, but by then I was married and pregnant with my first child. My husband refused to allow me to invite her to move in with us, since they didn't get along." Mrs. Tung's wry twitch of lips was harsh, but brief, showing only the smallest flash of teeth. "If we had at least taken in the boy, things would have been different, but, we had little enough money for ourselves."

Hai and her son had struggled on as long as possible, with what little was left from her parent's death, but their lives had been poor and very difficult. The few times she'd been able to visit her sister and the boy, Min had found young Dāi to be smart, but very reserved. He was well behaved, and hardly spoke, and his mother's eyes had burned with hatred whenever she bothered to notice him. Mrs. Tung had also noticed the boy often had bruises or small injuries, though she never actually saw her sister beat the boy, she was certain she had.

"My first husband and I divorced in '66 and when I remarried a year later my new husband, Mr. Tung allowed me to invite them to move in with us." This seemed to brighten her face slightly, lightening the heavy confession.

A few months later Min had met Leng Wu. Somehow the man had convinced Hai to let him court her, and a few months after that they were married.

"Wu was good to my sister and to Dāi. He paid attention to him and did things with him. I believe he also put pressure on Hai to be kinder to him and refused to let her abuse Dāi." Mrs. Tung smiled then. "We had tried to show the boy kindness, and bring him out of his shell. He was still very smart and very quiet, but he was also very distant, as if he didn't know how to respond to kindness or love. My husband tried to befriend him, but at the age of twelve, what he needed was a father. Wu was that and more. He took the boy under his wing, pushed him to do well in school. He even began training him in martial arts." Her smile faded at this. "Leng Wu was good for my sister and her boy, but he was not a good man. He told us he was a business man, but he was Triad at least, and probably worse."

Apparently, when Leng was fifteen, his father had been killed by a Turian Bounty Hunter. Tung Min was not sure what he'd done to piss off whoever had put the bounty on his head, but had surely involved drugs or weapons or slaves.

Hai had been inconsolable. Despite her mistrust of men, Wu had managed to make himself a necessary element in her life. Whether she actually loved him, or him her, remained to be see, but love or not she had always tried to please him and get his attention. She had always been jealous of the time Wu spent with her son, but had allowed it because it was what her husband wanted and he was a man that always got what he wanted.

So, in addition to mourning the loss of his step-father, Dāi had also had the renewed, as well as intensified, animosity of his mother and her grief to deal with. They might have gone back to the way things had been before Leng Wu entered their life, except for one thing. Dāi had changed.

The three years he'd spent with Wu had been a revelation. He was no longer the cowed boy he had been. He was a much stronger, much more confident, and much more formidable person. He had become a young man.

The next time his mother hit him, he hit back. She had screamed and made such a commotion that the neighbors had called the law enforcement.

"When the officers arrived they found my sister, unconscious, with a bloody knife clutched in her hand, and my nephew was gone. Hai said he'd attacked her and she had defended himself. She spent some time in the hospital, but overall her injuries weren't very bad. With Dāi gone, though… she had no one to take care of her. My husband and I were getting ready to migrate here to Xīnshēng, and she wouldn't come with us. She was so afraid of space and aliens." Min shook her head sadly and looked at her hands, which were folded neatly in her lap. "She'd always been fond of her drink, but after that… well, I heard she passed away a few years later. And we never heard from Dāi again." She raised her hands as if to say, 'and that's all there is'.

Sitting quietly in front of her terminal, Shepard had listened raptly, taking in every detail. It wasn't a very long story, but it was a sad one. Now that she had names and dates and places, she could have Liara find out more, but she did have one question for Tung Min.

"Did your nephew know what his step-father did? Did he know what he was involved it, do you think?"

Min shrugged. "Maybe, I don't know, but he could have. I think Wu was trying to groom Dāi to be the heir to his illegal empire. I suppose you could ask him."

Shepard felt her face tilt in a half smile. "I'll do that."

**AN: I know I said I'd get to the next interview, but this chapter was just so long already, and I don't want to rush that. Next time, I promise. As always please let me know what you think! I live for feedback! **


	15. Chapter 14

**AN: So, you know that feeling when you put an address in your GPS and you follow the directions to the T and somehow you end up on the wrong side of town from where you wanted to be? That's how this chapter made me feel. It's so late because I had to re-write it have a billion times. Shepard and Leng just refused to cooperate. First Shepard tried being all noble and having an attack of conscience that pissed me off, then she turned into crazy renegade chick that went completely off the deep end, and Leng! He was broody and surely all week and refused to memorize his lines. Dick. Anyway, I think I finally managed to just let them do their own thing and we all came up with something we can all agree works. Sort of. I think. *Growl* Please let me know what you think. I'm so mad at this chapter that I just can't even be objective about it anymore. Help?**

**Disclaimer: EA Games and Bioware have refused to give me the rights to Mass Effect, so until further notice, I don't have them.**

Chapter 14

"Commander, Admiral Hackett would like to speak to you on vidcom," Traynor announced as Shepard stepped out of the elevator and onto the CIC on her way to the airlock.

She paused, mid-step and wondered if she could put Hackett off until she'd had another chance to interview Leng. She hadn't checked in with Hackett for over a week, having nothing of note to report. Still, things would be worse if she made him wait.

'Time to pull out my bureaucratic BS jargon,' she thought as she spun on her heel and strode quickly, purposefully, pausing only briefly for the security scan before moving on to the war room and the communications chamber.

The Commander only had a short wait as she initiated her side of the call. She stood with back and shoulders straight and squared off and resisted the urge to cross her arms defensively over her chest.

When the figure of the Admiral materialized before her she saluted briefly and nodded.

"Admiral."

"Shepard," Hackett said in his professional, gravelly voice. "I'm checking in to get a status report on your progress with the cure and your experiment with Leng."

Shepard nodded again. "We've had some mixed results, but over all I'm encouraged by the progress we've made. We believe Leng is free from reaper manipulations, but we're still trying to determine the extent of the reapers influence as well as the level of cooperation we can expect from him on future endeavors. I don't trust him. Probably never will trust him, but if I can use him to get to the Illusive Man, then that's what I need to do next. I was just about to get a report from Dr. Chakwas and then have another interview with him."

"Has he given you any information on Cerberus at all?"

Shepard clenched her jaw slightly before answering. "Not yet, but I recently received new information that I feel will…"

Hackett cut her off with a small wave of his hand. "I know you're invested in this project, Shepard, and it's not that I don't trust your judgment, or your ability to see results, but I'm just not sure what you hope to achieve with this little side project. I know I don't need to remind you that we're still at war, and our enemy is the Reapers, despite all Cerberus has done to thwart us, they're really only a secondary concern. Our priority right now should be finding out about the catalyst and completing the crucible. Every day that goes by we lose more and more men and resources, as do our allies."

It was Shepard's turn to jump in. She made sure to keep her voice respectful and calm despite her frustration at being delayed. Her heart beat quickly as she thought of what she would say to Leng, how she could bring him down with her knowledge.

"You're right, Admiral, you don't need to remind me about the Reapers. I'm well aware of our priorities. At this point, my focus in on Leng because, right now, he's our only link to the prothean VI that has the information we need about the catalyst. The Illusive Man has that information, and Leng knows how to find him. Without the catalyst we're dead in the water, and I don't know where else to look for that information. Unless the Asari Councilor knows of another beacon her people might have stashed in another temple somewhere…"

The Admiral grunted. "If they do, they aren't saying." He folded his arms and leaned back on one hip. "I just want to make sure the results we see from your efforts are worth the price we're paying."

"I know Admiral," Shepard said with a sigh. "How are things on your end? I've had Dr. T'Soni coordinating with the crucible team about the Sanctuary data. Her latest report suggested they were close to developing a protocol for mass distribution."

Shepard made a mental note to remember and thank Liara for her latest report. Among this little tidbit of information there had been some updated information on Leng's activities surrounding the Ascension program at the Grissom Academy as well as his involvement in the death of one Paul Grayson and his daughter Gillian.

The Admiral nodded and let his scowl relax somewhat. "That's right. Dr. Cole and some of the other scientists here have been working overtime to develop an aerosol version of the formula. They're also working on a more effective shielding transmitter. So far the power the energy shield needed to fully block the Reapers signal limits the range, but we've recently been coordinating with a Dr. Bryson on the Citadel who has done some in depth research into this. I'm optimistic we'll have a more impressive prototype sometime next week."

Shepard's eyes went up appreciatively. "That soon?"

A faint smile threatened Hackett's face for the merest of instants. It wasn't often that Shepard was surprised by anything. "Apparently Dr. Bryson has been studying Sovereign's remains since the battle on the citadel. He's made leaps and bounds that are far beyond anything we could have come up with in such a short amount of time."

Wheels began turning in Shepard's head. If Hackett and the Crucible Team were really that close to a mass distribution of the cure… There was just one thing.

"It's true we've had some success with Leng, but his indoctrination was a subtle thing, very minimal. The Illusive Man has been using Reaper tech on the bulk of his forces, turning them in to mindless slaves. I'm wondering if our cure would work on that more in depth level of alteration. Its possible Cerberus has modified its process so much that our cure will be ineffective. Is there any chance you could put together a team to test the aerosol on Cerberus troops, once it's ready?"

Hackett's eyes narrowed slightly. "That could probably be arranged, once it's ready," after a moment's hesitation he continued. "What are you planning, Commander?" They'd worked closely enough that he, apparently, recognized the shrewd look in her eyes.

Shepard raised her head and refocused all her thoughts on Hackett. "Nothing, yet, Admiral, but if you can test our cure on Cerberus troops, and if it works, well, let's just say that I might have a way to make up for those men and resources we're losing now. In the meantime, I'll continue to put my full effort into retrieving the Catalyst data from the Illusive Man."

After what seemed like ten minutes Hackett finally nodded and let his scrutinizing look fade from his scarred and worn face. "Very well, Commander, but keep me posted. I want to know the moment you find out any useful information."

Shepard nodded and gave the Admiral a confident smile. "Of course, Admiral."

After one final nod he turned away. "Hackett out."

* * *

"I want to know everything you can tell me about this cure of yours. What it does, how it works, possible side effects, everything." Leng demanded as Dr. Chakwas stepped into the room. The Lieutenant guarding him had escorted him to the medical facilities lab closest to his cell while they waited for the doctor to arrive. Now that she was here, Leng didn't even wait for the door to shut behind her.

Chakwas stopped a few feet in front of him and gave him a raised eyebrow. "Good Morning to you, too."

"Cut the crap," Kai snarled. He was tired and irritable and not feeling nearly his usual stoic self. "I need to know what it is you've done to me."

Karin's brow creased with professional concern. "Are you experiencing side effects, then? What is it that's happening to you?" She raised her omni-tool and began scanning him from head to toe. "Are you experiencing pain or more hallucinations?"

"No," Leng growled, "nothing like that." He DID NOT want to explain his problem, especially with witnesses in the room. "Just give me the basic concepts behind it."

Dr. Chakwas frowned at her scan results. Aside from some elevated hormone levels, which could either be a symptom of the side effects or a result from how the side effects were affecting him emotionally, he was physically fine. In top condition, actually, with all the residual traces of his previous injuries were gone. He was in perfect health.

She shut down her tool and folded her arms, looking him over. He did look fairly ruffled. His hair was somewhat mussed and his eyes were slightly blood-shot.

"You're not sleeping well?" She made it a question, to be polite, but she could see he obviously was not.

"No," Leng said, pacing slightly. He was suddenly overcome with rage and frustration. He eyed his guard, wondering what he would do if Leng decided to take his frustration out on the man. He tried to focus on the problem at hand and explain things without actually explaining anything. "I'm experiencing… obsessive thoughts. My mind has fixated on some… disturbing thoughts and images. I'm having a hard time controlling them, which is not like me."

Vega grunted. He wondered what a Cerberus prick like Leng would consider disturbing. It'd have to be either something truly horrific, or something like having tea with a salarian.

Dr. Chakwas frowned at Vega and held a hand out to Leng. "If you could be a bit more specific…"

"No!" Leng barked harshly, turning towards the woman and clenching his fists to keep from reaching out to strangle her.

"I can't help you, if you don't tell me what's wrong." Karin appeared calm, though Leng and Vega both noticed her body tense and ready to jump away.

Kai glanced surreptitiously at Vega. "No, I can't."

"I see," Dr. Chakwas said, glancing Vega's way.

James grunted again and widened his stance. "Sorry, doc, I'm not going anywhere."

Chakwas shrugged. "Let me see if I can explain the basics for you then." She moved over to a large desk and pulled out a comfortable looking office chair. She sat, sighing in delight and then crossed her legs. She linked her fingers over her raised knee as she considered where to begin.

"The area of the brain affected by the Reapers indoctrination methods is the Limbic System. This is a complex set of brain structures that lies below the cerebrum. It's a collection of structures that support a variety of functions, including emotion, behavior, motivation, long-term memory, as well as a few other things. This is why we see the effects of Reaper control here. By tweaking just a few emotions or chemical motivators they can lean on your decision making capabilities to suit their needs."

"The formula developed as a cure basically acts as a flush for those chemicals that are affected without damaging the brain tissue or the areas of the brain where memory is stored. We don't want to completely wipe out a person's identity or personality, but with so many different parts of the brain being affected, all of the different ways someone will be effected are too numerous to count. Hence the trial." She waved in his direction vaguely before continuing.

"There would obviously be naturally occurring chemical imprints that would be flushed as well, as a sort of a collateral damage, but seeing as how the body is almost constantly altering and adjusting those levels, we figured the brain would be back to normal after a short adjustment period."

"How short an adjustment period?" Leng's voice was full of wary suspicion.

"No way to tell for certain. It could be a matter of days, maybe longer."

Leng leaned back against a counter and sighed, running his shackled hands over his face. "Great, that's just great."

"From what little you've told me, and from what my scans show I could attempt an educated guess as to what it is you're experiencing."

Kai raised his face and eyed her warningly, casting another glance at Vega.

"Just a general guess, mind you," she assured quickly. "The amygdala is one of those structures involved. It does many things, including acting as a sort of memory retrieval system, but it is also involved in attention and emotional processes. It gives us the ability to hone in on some stimuli while ignoring others. It also helps us to define a stimulus and therefore respond accordingly, and is therefore involved in social processing such as fight or flight responses or sexual attraction." Her voice was succinct and correct as she moved on to the next subject.

"There is also the Hippocampus, which deals mostly with memory and the creation thereof, but is also involved with our learning ability. It could simply be that your ability to control your thoughts and emotions, something you had to learn to do, was simply reset by the chemical cleanse and you're seeing some feedback from the processes of the amygdala that continue with or without that learned ability."

"You said this would be temporary?" Leng said after taking a moment to analyze and the doctor's words and adjust them to fit his situation.

"It should be," Chakwas assured him carefully. "After all, the majority of the structure of the brain that makes up you and who you are is made up of electrical impulses, not chemical mixtures. If you think of the core of your being, the bulk of your brain, as solid, then the mold of your "self" as it were, that would be a bowl that we just rinsed out. Eventually the empty places will fill back up, forming themselves in the same shape as the more permanent "mold", essentially in the same shape they were before, except with a truly pure and natural mixture of liquids, not one contaminated by corrosive reaper fluids."

Eventually Leng nodded to acknowledge his understanding.

"And if it doesn't just come back, you can always just re-learn those behaviors. You learned them before; you should be able to do it again in no time, right?" Her cheerful optimism made Kai's stomach turn.

"Right," he agreed wryly, a hitch in his upper lip looking very much like the precursor to a full on snarl.

Chakwas slapped her hands onto her now uncrossed knees and then stood up. "If there's nothing else, I have work to do back on the Normandy."

Vega waited for the doctor to leave before escorting Leng back to his cell.

* * *

As the Commander was walking past the elevator, the doors opened and Liara stepped out.

"Oh, Shepard, I'm glad I caught you. I have that report you asked for on Wu Leng," Liara held out a data pad.

Shepard paused and turned to accept the pad, not wanting to stop, but wanting the report before she began her next interrogation with Leng. "Thank you," Raina turned and took a step before turning back to the asari. "I just want you to know how much I appreciate all the hard work you've been putting in. I know the last couple of weeks have been… difficult, Liara, but your efforts are making a difference here, really." She placed a hand on her friend's shoulder and gave it a meaningful squeeze.

Liara nodded and blushed slightly. "Thank you, Shepard. That means a lot."

Shepard nodded back and then lowered her hand and turned to go. She raised the pad and read slowly as she made her way down the familiar walkway, her steps falling naturally without needing input from her eyes.

As she neared the airlock her steps slowed, and her brow furrowed. The information she was reading was somewhat surprising. She had expected something that read like a law enforcement report, but this was more like a business portfolio or a resume. There were some bits "Known Associates" that seemed to imply mafia associations, but apparently he'd kept business carefully legitimate or had never been caught with the below board stuff.

Wu Leng had been CEO or Nashan Stellar Dynamics, a corporation that manufactured parts for starships. He had invested in several other large corporations such as Rosenkov Materials and Ariake Technologies.

The biggest surprise, or perhaps it shouldn't have been a surprised at all, was that he was one of the first, and most supportive members of the Terra Firma party.

She was breezing over the rest of the condensed report when the doors in front of her opened and Dr. Chakwas stepped through.

"Ah, Commander, I was just coming to look for you," the doctor stepped up to her.

"Of course you were," Shepard sighed.

"Sorry?" Chakwas asked, her forehead creasing in confusion.

"Nothing, Doctor, what did you need?" Raina had a hard time keeping down her frustration at yet another interruption, but she made a solid effort.

"I just had an interesting conversation with our guest. It seems he's been experiencing some side effects from the treatment."

"What kinds of side effects?" Shepard asked with a jolt. She hadn't had time to check on Leng's status since they'd arrived at the Lazarus station. He'd seemed fine the last time they had talked and she hadn't considered that there would be delayed effects.

"He says he's having trouble maintaining cognitive control, experiencing obsessive thoughts and disturbing images, and his hormone levels were considerably elevated and he seemed rather distraught. I'm concerned that, especially with his violent tendencies and antagonistic background that he may be even more of a threat than usual."

The Commander chewed through this piece of news and considered the various implications. "You mean he's not acting his usual calm and collected self?" That might not be a totally bad thing. "Do you think he might be losing his mind? I can handle some erratic behavior, but he's no good to me if he's completely out of control."

"No, no, nothing like that, at least not yet. I suspect the effects are temporary, as I told Mr. Leng, but I just think you might want to use extra caution around him till he's able to get his emotions back under control. He wouldn't give me any specifics, but it's pretty clear that whatever it is that's gotten under his skin has him pretty upset. I wouldn't be surprised if he begins exhibiting irrational behavior, and if he blames you for what's going on in his head, well, who knows what he'll do in response."

Shepard suppressed the urge to grin evilly. Distraught, over-emotional Kai Leng would be much easier to manipulate and control then over-confident, locked-down-tight Kai Leng. "I'll take that under advisement, doctor. Is there anything else?"

Dr. Chakwas narrowed her eyes suspiciously as Shepard pushed past her and stepped into the airlock. "That's it for now, Commander."

"Great," Shepard said as she turned back. "Write me up a full report on Leng's condition and send it to me ASAP. I want to more, but I need to go just now."

"Of course, Commander," Chakwas said, as the airlock doors closed between them.

* * *

By the time Vega had Leng back at his cell, his shift was over and his replacement was waiting. Ensign Foul Mouth was waiting, a folded stack of clothing in his arms and scowl on his face.

"Where the hell you been, Vega? Commander just pinged; she's on her way down to see the prisoner."

Vega shot the marine a relaxed smile. "We were just down talk'n to the doc. Tali send those down?" James asked, nodding in the direction of pile of black the man was holding.

"Yeah, new garb for the Cerberus creep." The Ensign waved his pass card in front of the scanner and opened Leng's cell. "You've got sixty second to change before we step next door." He handed the bundle to Leng and then unlocked the connecting chain between his wrists and motioned for him to get a move on.

Kai gave him a murderous glare and then, finally, stepped through the door. Once the door was shut he moved smoothly, refusing to rush, but not wanting to be caught with his pants down. He was glad to be rid of the one piece body suit. He was, under normal circumstances, accustomed to wearing such apparel, but under this situation he found it to be confining and uncomfortable. It was probably psychological.

With the old suit off he unfolded the new clothes, a plain black t-shirt and athletic pants, which felt thicker and slightly heavier than normal clothes should, as well as a pair of slip-on rubber souled shoes. He dressed quickly and walked over to splash water on his face. If he was going to have to face the Commander in a few minutes he wanted to be completely under control.

He felt somewhat better after talking with Dr. Chakwas, but not completely. He didn't think what was happening was a deliberate effect of Shepard's cure, but that didn't change the fact that he was tired and irritable and horny as hell.

Just as he was drying his face with a hand towel that resembled nothing so much as a sheet of flexible cardboard, his door reopened and his grumpy guard was standing just inside, his arms tense at his sides and his face twisted in disgust.

"Let's go," he said, in a tone that begged to be argued with.

Kai didn't rise to the bait, though. He simply turned and walked out of the room. He remembered the man saying something about next door and since there was only one other door in this stretch of hallway he used his not inconsiderable powers of deduction and headed for that door. Another card wave before another scanner and they were in. This new room was much like his cell, minus toilet, sink and bed. Instead it had one table and two chairs sitting opposite each other.

The meat-head marine ordered him to sit in the chair on the far side and then began the familiar routine of mag locking his manacles to the table and chair legs.

"That won't be necessary, Richeson."

The voice made both men start as they looked up to see the Commander standing in the doorway, data pad in hand, blank expression on her face.

"Sorry, ma'am?" Ensign Richeson's face was doing a funny dance between concerned confusion and dutiful respect.

"That will be all. I'll take it from here." The calm explanation only seemed to deepen the confusion and prolong the marine's hesitation.

"You're dismissed, Ensign," Shepard said, her voice more firm.

Leng wondered if he was imagining things, or if he'd really seen the flash of irritation in the Commander's eyes. Apparently he wasn't the only one short of patience today.

The Ensign, training kicking in to save him from his hesitation stepped up, saluted, and then left.

Shepard stood for a minute, her face blank as she studied him. He sat perfectly still and focused on keeping his mind as blank as his face.

A considering slant to her brow made his own eyes narrow reflexively, suspicion making his pulse speed up slightly. Finally, Shepard stepped forward, laying the pad on the table and reaching into a pocket. She removed a small metal instrument and it was everything he could do not to flinch away. If she had finally decided to put him down he would be ready to fight. He would…

She reached out and pressed the device into his manacles and they fell away, the faint buzzing of the magnetic field dying instantly. She grabbed the wrist shackles and slid them over to the far corner of the table.

"You look like hell, Leng," she said as she sat in her chair. "Dr. Chakwas tells me you've been suffering some side effects?"

Kai ignored the questioning lilt to Shepard's tone and continued to study her, wondering what her new angle was. He refused to move, though his body was tense, and he itched to rub the raw circle around his now bare wrists. He just sat there, still, and waited for the punch line.

Shepard sat down in her chair and picked up the data pad again. Her eyes moved over whatever information was there and Kai wondered if this was a trap. She was leaving herself vulnerable, and when he attacked she would defend herself with lethal force. He couldn't figure out why she would want to kill him now, though, and if she did, why did she think she needed an excuse like self-defense to put him down. There were no camera's in this room, he'd checked, and they were totally alone.

Eventually, after flipping through some files on her pad, she placed it on the table and turned it, pushing it towards him.

At first, he refused to take his eyes off of her, but, after a few seconds, curiosity got the better of him. There were several pictures on display for his viewing pleasure. The first set were pictures he recognized as Sanctuary refugees, the faces of families that had been turned into husks or outright executed by the agents there. Mothers, fathers, and children- the faces flashed by as the display changed every few seconds. After half a minute or so the theme changed to victims of the attack on the citadel. There were members of the other races present in most of the pictures, but the focus of the new set of photos was obviously the human casualties and injuries.

When that morbid show had run its course the last of the photos switched to something completely different, something he hadn't expected.

All of the men shown were dead, that was the only way they would be in a position to be photographed by members of the Alliance. Most still wore their Cerberus armor, though their helmets had been removed. The faces beneath were all hideously changed with massive bruising, black orbital sockets, and worms of glowing reaper tech burrowing under the skin and radiating from their cybernetic eyes.

The last three photos surprised him as well, not in their content, so much as the fact that they left him marveling at Shepard's ability to pull classified information from the Cerberus network.

There was a photo of the Grayson family, Paul and his daughter, together before she was enrolled in the Ascension program. The last two were their autopsy photos. Paul Grayson was displayed in all his twisted, grotesque, glory, the Reaper tech transformation obvious in the tubes and wires that were blended horribly with his body's tissue. Then Gillian Grayson, her flesh pale and plastic looking, her neck punctured deeply with a small jagged hole that had opened up all the way down to her carotid artery.

The slideshow stopped there, the image holding until Shepard reached over and turned the power off on the data pad.

"I'm sure there are a lot more examples of people, of humans, that Cerberus has betrayed and killed since they've been under the influence of the Reapers, but I only had a few days to put this together." She slid the pad away, setting it next to his discarded chains. "I'm just wondering where the line is, Leng."

Leng narrowed his eyes again, but didn't ask the question she so clearly expected him to ask. She continued anyway, dauntless in her inquiry. Her eyes were beginning to burn with barely contained fury.

"How many people is it okay to kill in the name of your cause? At what point are you just sacrificing lives to further your own ends? What number makes it a betrayal of the very people you say you're championing? How much of this is the Reapers and how much of it was just Cerberus being Cerberus? Now that they're gone, can you still say these human deaths were "necessary"?"

With each question, her voice became more intense, her tone more pointed. She wasn't yelling, yet, but the quivering, repressed rage was obvious just beneath her skin.

"Dammit, Leng, why can't you just admit you've been played? Cerberus has been turned into a murdering, monstrous tool by the Reapers, anyone can see that. How can you look at what they've done and think, "oh, that's okay, it's for a good cause" and really be able to believe it." Shepard was leaning intently over the table now, and Leng found he couldn't look away from her. She really was beautiful when she was angry.

Kai snarled at the thought. Shepard took that as a response to her words and stood up, leaning across the table, really getting into his face.

"You know I'm right. Your aunt said you were always a smart kid."

The words hung in the air between them, a silent echo that vibrated between them as meaning sunk deeper and deeper with each passing second.

Shepard didn't even see him move. There was simply a swirl of vertigo, and then pain was shooting through her body as she was twisted beneath him, and her airway was cut off, his forearm pressing down into her windpipe.

"What did you just say?" Leng hissed his question inches from her face. The back of her head burned a sudden red as its impact against the table registered. Somehow he'd not only managed to move around to her side of the table, but flip her over and bend her backwards before she even knew what was happening.

'Damn, he's good,' she thought ruefully as her chest started to burn. She managed to get her fingers around his wrist and elbow and push up enough to suck in a quick breath.

"Your aunt Min," she gasped between breaths, "Nice lady," choke, "said you were," wheeze, "smart."

Despite her rather critical position Kai was surprised to see a victorious smirk crease her strained face. With a burst of synthetically enhanced strength she forced him back enough to get her feet up between them and shoved him away with her boots planted firmly in his diaphragm.

Leng staggered back, catching himself before he slammed into the door. Shepard bucked her hips and was on her feet, hands raised in a defensive stance and her chest heaving as she sucked in a deep breath. She still carried that self-satisfied smirk that made Leng's blood boil in his veins. He could feel the edges of his energy trickling away whenever he tried to push himself, but he was too focused on the fight to really care, just now.

"Don't tell me you've forgotten dear old aunty Min," Shepard's voice was slightly hoarse, but the teasing lilt seeped through the croak, regardless. "It's too bad you didn't turn out more like your aunt," this was followed by a deceptively casual shrug. "Oh, well, you won't be the first person that turned out just like their mother."

Kai felt like someone had slugged him in the gut. Again. He roared in outrage and leapt at her, his first lashed out in the perfect execution of a round-house punch. Shepard dodged this neatly, but he followed through with his elbow and managed to graze her jaw. With her head turned he reached his right hand up and grabbed the crook of her neck and used her own momentum to throw her bodily into the wall.

Shepard's shoulder hit painfully, the angle jolting the joint harshly, but she rolled away in time to see Leng's next hit as his fist connected jarringly with the wall. She swept her arm up and out to block another punch and wheeled her other arm up to crack him across the mouth.

He never hesitated, though his movements seemed to be slowing, his left hand came up in a vicious backhand that felt like it cracked her left cheekbone, but her smile never faded. She brought her left knee up into his ribs forcing him to bend and lean away from the impact.

Fast as lightning, his arm was under her thigh and had her shoved up against the wall, his body pinning hers from shoulder to knee. He raised his free right hand wrapped his fingers around her throat. She wrapped both her hands around his wrist and applied pressure, not enough to pull his hand away, but enough to keep him from killing her.

"You don't know anything about me," he snarled, his face twisted in hatred.

"Sure I do," she laughed. "I know enough to know mommy dearest is a bit of a sore topic. I know about Wu and how he died. I even know your real name." Her grin widened as he hissed at her and leaned closer, his hips now grinding painfully into hers.

Her chest expanded sharply against his and he was suddenly very aware of every plane and curve of her. He was suddenly frozen in place. He wasn't sure if he wanted to snap her neck or rip her clothes off and fuck her against the wall. Maybe both, though not necessarily in that order.

He struggled to breath, he struggled to see through the berserker red haze that muddied his thoughts, but most of all he struggled not to press his mouth over the smug twist of her lips and wipe that smile away with his force of his lust.

He wanted to run a blade down her neck and watch the wash of red coat her, her delicate insides put where everyone could see, exposed, the way she had ripped his past life open and shoved it into his face.

Kai's head swam with so many conflicting emotions that it made him dizzy. 'Damn you,' he cursed silently at her. 'Damn you for making me lose control.'

He couldn't seem to get enough air. He sucked it in through his clenched teeth and then felt, for the first time, the exhaustion that pulled inexorably at his exerted strength. Kai began to tremble then, fighting the drain, and refusing to show weakness.

Cursing loudly, he stepped away and ripped his hand from her neck and her grasp. He slammed his already bloodied knuckles into the table as he turned. He had to lean both palms against the table to keep from dropping to his knees. "Fucking bitch, what have you done to me?" he whispered under his breath, but apparently it was loud enough for her to hear.

"I know how you tick, Leng, I've unlocked all your dirty little secrets and now I own you. You can't kill me because you know I'm right, and because I've made sure your nasty little upgrades are neutralized."

Leng laughed bitterly and shook his head. Obviously, she didn't know everything about him. She had clearly misinterpreted his retreat as submission. Let her think what she wanted. He would use her mistake against her the first chance he got.

"So," he said between breathes as he turned and leaned back, half sitting on the edge of the table and facing her, "Where does that leave us?" There was a tickle on his chin and he reached up to swipe a hand across his split lip, clearing away the trickle of blood.

"Well, we can keep trying to kill each other, till one of us wins." Her tone clearly implied who she thought the victor of that would be. "Then I can hunt down the Illusive Man, wasting precious time and resources, and maybe get the job done before the Reapers set every planet in the galaxy to burn, and maybe I find a way to stop them and maybe I don't , but the odds are good that the Reapers win and we all lose, the Alliance, Cerberus, the Council, everyone."

Leng grunted at her melodramatic statement of the facts, but followed her reasoning.

"Or," she said, emphasizing that one little word like the universe depended on it, "you agree to help me, we take Cerberus back from the Reapers, cure your boss and work together to beat the Reapers. Then we can go back to trying to kill each other, if you want, but I think we can both see there are more important things at stake right now, things that come before our pride and hate."

"I suppose you just want me to tell you everything I know and expect me to trust that you won't just use it to wipe Cerberus off the map. Fat chance," he spit as he crossed his arms and glared at her.

"No way," she said shaking her head. This motion seemed to cause her quite a bit of pain, and she winced and glared back. "We're enemies. Deciding to work together to take out a bigger threat doesn't change that. I don't trust you, and you don't trust me. We both know that isn't going to change."

"So what do you purpose?" he was truly intrigued now. She had expected her speech to be heavy on the "forsake the dark side and join me" and "good will triumph over evil" and "you can trust me 'cause I'm the good guy" platitudes. This attitude of hers was surprisingly honest and alluringly practical.

"Well, we'll just have to come up with a plan we both can agree to, won't we?" Her half smile was back.

He rolled his eyes in frustration and tried to ignore the jolt of liquid heat that smile made pulse along his spine.

"That much is obvious. I mean, where do you want to start?

Her smirk deepened again and she said one word. It was a word that made his cheek twitch and his stomach churn.

"Omega."

**AN: And now for some bad news. There probably won't be another update this weekend. I'm working on a contest piece for Aria's Afterlife Valentines Challenge, so until that's done, I have to put this piece on hold. Don't worry, it'll only be for a week or so, and that's probably a good thing. I need some time to cool off and re-focus before diving into the next chapter. Once I have the contest fic posted, you should all read it. It will be very light and fluffy compared to this, and should be a nice change of pace! Yay, fluff.**


	16. Chapter 15

**AN: YES! That's right! I'm back. It's been sort of an odd, crazy busy, distracting sort of year for me, and so you all have my most profound apologies for making you wait so long. That's life for you, right? Well, I'm jumping back into it now, and I'm going to make a real effort to keep the updates coming. Hopefully, you haven't all abandoned hope and given up on me. This chapter is nice and long, so I hope that goes a long way towards making it up to you! Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Like so many things in this world, I have no claim over Mass Effect or its characters, but that hasn't stopped me yet, so here we go.**

Chapter 15

"I have conditions."

Leng continued his scrutiny of the Commander, who stood next to the wall a few feet away from him as he pushed the words out over the tender split in his lower lip.

"Of course you do," she said as she stepped around him to sit back in her chair. Somehow she managed to make her tone both perfectly reasonable and cynically condescending at the same time. He would have to find out how she did that. She crossed her legs, more composed than ever, and completely ignored the red and purple welts rising in delicate slow motion across the skin of her neck.

She folded her hands in her lap and arched an eyebrow at him in impatient query.

Kai folded his arms over his chest and began pacing behind his side of the table. He refused to sit, mostly because he so desperately needed to. His earlier outburst had really left him weakened. He would be damned if he was going to show that to Shepard, though, especially now that they were in the midst of negotiations.

"No more shackles, first of all," he said finally, having made a quick mental list of what he should ask for. He figured he'd start with that since they were already there.

The Commander narrowed her eyes at him ever so slightly. "What part of 'We're enemies' and 'I don't trust you' did you miss?" She was back to her usually calm and collected self, but a hint of distrust and disgust managed to leak through. "If you think this means I'm going to allow my team to let their guard down for even an instant, you're very, very wrong. If anything, I expect we'll have to watch you even more closely now."

Leng felt his lips twitch in a semi-appreciative smirk. Shepard would be difficult to a worthy opponent, for sure. He looked forward to besting her once and for all. "Be that as it may, you will have to keep an eye on my unrestrained, because that I said so, or no deal."

Shepard knew this request wasn't really about shackles, not really. It was about power, and who had how much of it. She absolutely despised having to make deals with terrorists, but as things were she didn't have too many other options. It was only the end of life as they knew it on the line. She nodded her head ever so slightly as she acceded, and then added her own caveat.

"If I let you go without shackles, you have to know what that will mean for you," she said coolly as she leaned forward and rested her folded hands on her knee. "I will double your guard and put my people on high alert. You won't get any warning shots, no three strikes. You so much as sneeze funny and my people will be justified in putting a double tap in the back of your skull. Are you sure you want to risk there being any… misunderstandings that might end in your swift and final execution?"

"I wouldn't be the only one bearing that risk, remember, you need me. If one of your people gets it in their head to put me down on some petty vendetta then we all lose. They may be able to take me down, but I won't go without a fight. If one of your people makes a move on me I will not hesitate to take as many of them with me as I can." He leaned over the back of his chair, gripping the back of it as he gave her his own version of condescension. "Just something to consider when you assign your watch dogs," he said with a sickly sweet smile.

Shepard's eyes narrowed again and he watched her bruised and mottled throat as she swallowed hard. "Fair enough," she said after a pause that managed to be only mildly telling. Having just sampled his abilities, hampered as they were, she knew he wasn't bluffing or making idle threats.

Kai smiled triumphantly and stepped back from his chair, back on his route pacing from corner to corner. "Second, I would like access to some reading materials. When we're not working on or executing our plans I will need something to occupy my time."

Shepard nodded with a small smile. Dr. Chakwas had reported on Leng's rather predictable attempt to hack the doctor's data pad. "I'll have something sent over," she said with a small smile. She had some hardcopy books in her quarters, and knew there were a few other members of the crew that kept a few treasured paperback or two in their possessions onboard.

The assassin's smile faded a little at the lack of resistance, but pressed on with his next request, knowing it would be, possibly, the hardest one on which to get her compliance. "I also want time for exercise and activity."

Shepard frowned slightly. "Hasn't Dr. Chakwas been letting you out to walk…"

Leng cut her off with a slash of his hand. "I'm not talking about a few laps walked around the commissary. I want two hours, with equipment, in a gym or the best equivalent you can put together on this station, without this," he waved at his torso and legs, "energy draining shit."

"No," Shepard started, shaking her head and sitting up straighter in her chair, "no way."

"Fine," Leng said with a sharp, but quite snarl. "Then I think we're done here." Leng walked over to the door and stood before it, arms crossed.

Raina felt her jaw tighten and her interwoven fingers clenched until all ten knuckles were white as bone.

"Sit down, Leng," she said through gritted teeth. Shepard ran through options and possible scenarios while she waited for him to return to the table. She considered just lying to him and telling her it wasn't something they could turn on and off, that it was permanent, maybe, but dismissed that idea as flawed. She was still running through strategies, her eyes looking past Leng as he leaned against the back of his chair again. The latent smirk on his face was enough to get her adrenaline back to need-to-put-my-fist-through-something levels.

"For someone who is supposed to be such a professional, you can be really childish, you know that?"

Leng shrugged and let his smirk make the briefest of appearances. "For someone who's supposed to be the galaxy's brave and fearless hero, you seem to be feeling a lot of cowardly paranoia," he shot back. "Don't get me wrong, it's probably the smartest thing you've ever done, considering me to be such a threat, and taking every possible precaution, but let's face it. I can hardly be effective if I'm being chained and collared like a rabid dog, now, can I? Besides, neither of us benefits if I lose my edge and go soft sitting idle in a cell."

Shepard refused to be baited by his words, and forced herself to breath slow, and even and think rationally. Blind acquiescence would be a mistake, but this was obviously something he wasn't willing to let go. She figured he was looking for ways to be on his strongest footing, thereby allowing for the highest chance at escape. She just needed to make adjustments, and counter the allowances to his strength with her own strengths. She folded her arms across her chest and smiled for the first time in minutes.

"Fine, on two conditions."

Leng raised his own questioning brow in mock salute to the look she'd given him earlier.

"First, you will have to do your workouts in the Normandy cargo bay. We have equipment there, and I don't want to deprive my men by moving it into the station just for you." It would also put them on her home turf and ensure he didn't use some hidden Cerberus escape hatch or something.

Leng shrugged in acceptance.

"Second, you're workouts will have to revolve around my schedule, as I will need to be present for all of them."

Surprise registered in the merest flicker across Leng's face before he brought back his triumphant smirk. "I'm flattered, Commander, but you should know I would hate being objectified as a sex object. You can look, but don't touch, or I'll have to report you to Alliance High Command for sexual harassment."

Shepard rolled her eyes and scoffed in disbelief. "Please," she growled in disgust.

"Well, if you want some pointers on your combat technique, all you have to do is ask. Really."

Shepard sighed in a 'you're-trying-my-patience' way and reached across the table for data pad and shackles on the table. "Will that be all, then?"

"Almost," Leng said with a chuckle. "I just want to make sure it's a given that I'll be included in any and all planning of operations with a Cerberus objective, we're talking full disclosure, and I want to make sure you know I expect to be on the ground during those operations, front and center at all times." Leng's playful smile was completely gone by now, the real meat of his demands finally coming forward.

They weren't really anything more then she'd expected, which was a small relief.

"Yes, well, as long as you know that "full disclosure" is relative. I'm obviously not going to be giving you any detailed information on Alliance tech, personnel, or covert ops. I agree to including you in the planning process on our own operations, Omega included, but you won't know about any other Alliance ops, whether they involve Cerberus or not. You won't be given any information on coordinating Alliance units, for instance, but I promise to make sure you know what will be required of you at all times and in every given situation." Raina tucked the data pad under her left armpit and draped the shackles over her forearm. "I anticipated your desire to be involved in our mission so I'm working on a solution that will make your presence more of a benefit then a risk, and neutralize any possibility for you to either escape or turn on me and my people. You will be allowed to accompany me and my team as long as you agree to submit to that solution."

"Which will be?" Leng was truly curious to know how Shepard planed on keeping him in line once they were in a messy combat situation. He was envisioning everything from her making him go in unarmed, (well, as unarmed as he ever was, which wasn't to say defenseless), to equipping him with a shock collar, to attempting some kind of Alliance mind control or subliminal suggestion.

Shepard replied with a cold smile. "All in good time, Leng. I wouldn't want to spoil the surprise. For now, just sit tight. It might be a few weeks before we're ready to mobilize on Omega. We're still waiting for the scientists to put together the mass-application version of the cure and I've got other things to work on in the meantime."

Leng wanted to object, but when he opened his mouth to do so, Shepard cut him off. "I don't expect you to be forthcoming with your side of the information until I am with mine, so don't worry. We're both stuck waiting for the science and tech guys anyway, so let's not jump into anything too revealing on either side just now. I realize this will have to be a quid quo pro situation all the way, so I think it's best if we just take this one step at a time, don't you?" There was a suspiciously innocent lilt to the Commanders voice, but Leng could find no reasonable objections to make to her logical statements. He nodded, just once and made sure his face was as blank as he could make it.

"Let's call it a day then. I'm a busy woman, after all. So, if there's nothing else…" Shepard stood and waved Leng towards the door.

Kai stepped around his eyes on her placid expression until she was out of his peripheral vision. He heard her shift the chains to her other arm and activate her omni-tool.

"Okay, Richeson, we're finished here."

Two seconds later the door was open and Leng stepped through to face the unpleasant Ensign who blinked stupidly at Leng's unrestrained wrists and then glanced at Shepard and her bruised face and throat. His hand twitched toward his sidearm, but Shepard was soon standing in front of him, between the distressed man and Leng.

"Mr. Leng will not need his restraints any longer, Ensign," Shepard explained in her best I'm-in-charge-and-not-to-be-questioned voice as she stood, back straight and chin up, before the flustered marine. Her commanding presence and sure, confident tone elicited a strong response in the man, who snapped to attention and saluted with precision.

"Yes, sir," Richeson said, his eyes lock straight ahead.

Commander Shepard sighed slightly as she saluted back. Richeson was new to the crew since they had fled Earth and so was more formal and uptight around her then the rest of her crew. "I'm going to ask Garrus to join you. We'll be doubling his guard from now on." Shepard glanced at Kai and gave him a calculating look. "Mr. Leng has promised to be on his best behavior, but I'm trusting you to keep your eye on him at all times, and don't hesitate to use lethal force if he gives you any trouble, any at all."

Richeson's eye settled on Leng for a fraction of a second, but in that fraction Shepard had seen a malicious glint. She made a mental note to pull the Ensign off guard duty after this shift. "That said, I expect there won't be any misunderstandings, will there, Ensign?"

"No, sir," Richeson replied instantly, eyes once again forward and at attention.

"Very good," Shepard nodded and stepped over to open Leng's cell door for him and addressed him as she waited for him to enter. "I'll have reading material sent down as soon as I'm back on the Normandy and I'll have you brought over this evening for your gym time." As expected she was, once again, all cool professionalism.

Leng replied with his own polite nod and stepped into his cell once again. With the sound of the door closing behind him, he sighed and rubbed his wrists carefully.

On one hand he appreciated his newly acquired freedoms, and would be planning non-stop to use them to his biggest advantage. On the other hand, he had the sinking suspicion that he was exactly where Shepard wanted him. His unease sloshed together with his rage and frustration and he had to work to quiet his thoughts.

One step at a time, Shepard had said, and she was right. Leng was one step closer to freedom and taking down the Commander. It was time to plan his next step.

* * *

"Garrus, the Commander would like you to meet her in the CIC," EDI's voice vibrated strangely against the faint harmonic thrum of the Drive Core. For once, Vakarian was not at his normal post in the battery, but leaning suavely against a console in engineering.

His finger paused in its path down Tali's arm, the light, flirtatious touch frozen by the voice of the AI.

"Now?" he asked as he cleared his throat and stepped away from the now giggling quarian.

EDI's voice was as neutral as ever, but the turian could have sworn there was an amused undertone as she answered, "Commander Shepard is currently on her way back to the ship from the prisoner's quarters on the Lazarus station. At her current rate of speed she will be entering the airlock in approximately 2.43 minutes. Decontamination will take 9.88 seconds, thereby giving you 155.68 seconds to be exiting the lift at deck 2 if you intend to ensure the Commander has no wait time. I have dispatched the lift to deck 4 but at current speeds the lift will take…"

"Right, right, just tell me how long I have," Vakarian cut in curtly.

"About 44 seconds, give or take," EDI replied and Garrus was now certain her mobile platform was smiling.

Turning back to look at Tali, who was making a very valiant effort not to snicker as she monitored the drive core outputs and made minor adjustments when needed.

Garrus sighed heavily and let his mandibles fall to his chest plate. "Guess I'll have to catch you later, Tali'Zorah."

"I'll be here," Tali replied her amusement more than evident.

"Maybe I'll bring some turian chocolate with me, when I come back. You know, if you want me to," he said with a cavalier shrug.

Tali's head snapped up in surprise. "Where in the Home World did you find turian chocolate?"

Garrus' shrug was more sheepish this time. "What? It was a gift."

The young quarian shook her head and Garrus watched, delighted as her eyes flashed slightly behind her face plate. "A gift? From who?"

"Oh, nobody, really, just a friend from the Citadel…"

"A friend, huh? Was this a female friend, by any chance?" Her playful suspicion held real hints of jealousy, if Garrus was reading her quarian inflections properly.

"Oh, you know, just a friend. Well, I think my 44 seconds are probably up, I better go. Don't want to make the Commander wait on me. You know how busy she is lately…" And with that he wheeled around and headed for the lift as fast as his two-toed feet could carry him.

* * *

As she stepped down into the CIC proper, Shepard spotted Garrus just exiting the lift on the other side of the galaxy map. She nodded to several of the crew working at the various control stations around the perimeter, and shot Traynor a smile and a nod as she approached Vakarian.

"You're here, good. Garrus I need you to go down and assist Ensign Richeson in watching the prisoner. He's agreed to assist us with our objectives and as such I've had his shackles removed." Said shackles hung from her hand and clinked softly as she spoke, her hands making small unconscious gestures. "I'm doubling up on his guard, though, and I want you to make sure that he's watched even more closely than before. He's still under the influence of the disruptors, but I don't want us slipping up and giving him the opening I'm sure he's still waiting for. If he makes a move, I want you to put him down hard, you got it?"

Garrus was doing the turian equivalent of a deep frown, but he nodded, nevertheless. "He's told you where the Illusive Man is, then?"

Shepard shook her head and set the shackles and her data pad down on her personal terminal. "No, not yet, but I think I've got him convinced that he was, in fact, indoctrinated, and he seems concerned with making sure that we can deliver a cure to the rest of Cerberus. It's a step in the right direction, but we still don't trust each other, and it's going to be slow work, but I think, in time, I can convince him to give us the location of the Illusive Man and the prothean VI that he stole from us on Thessia."

The turian was nodding, when Kaidan spoke, stepping out from behind Traynor, having apparently just come from the war room. "What if you're wrong, Shepard? What if Leng is simply playing you in order to make it easier to escape? What if he has no intention of ever helping us find out about the catalyst?"

The Commander exhaled deeply and crossed her arms in a defensive gesture. "I assure you, Major, that I have taken those considerations into account, hence the double guard, and I have decided that this is a risk we'll just have to take…"

Garrus watched Shepard trail off as Alenko gasped, and reached out to grasp the Commander lightly by the chin and tilt her face. The left side of her face was lightly swollen and the skin looked red and sore. There were also finger shaped bruises marring the creamy skin of her exposed neck.

"What happened?"

Kaidan's voice was low and deadly. Garrus glanced away, and shuffled nervously to his left, putting more space between him and the irate human male.

Shepard's eyes burned defiantly back at the Major and she stepped back, pulling her chin out of his hold. "Nothing I couldn't handle."

Kaidan's hands dropped to his side and his fists clenched in an obvious desire to do violence. "So, let me see if I have this straight. Our prisoner, a deadly and devious terrorist assassin attacks you, tries to choke the life out of you and you think now is the best time to give take his chains off and start trusting his promises of cooperation?"

Alenko laughed bitterly, though his face never lost its strained, furious expression. "With all due respect, Commander, but have you completely lost your mind?"

Garrus winced and took another step away. Distance was his best bet at escaping the conflict about to be unleashed in the CIC.

"With all due respect, Major Alenko," Shepard began, the chill in her voice making everyone with in hearing distance shiver and want to hunch into a protective fetal position, "did it ever occur to you that I actually know a thing or two about manipulation and strategic negotiation? Did you stop to think, for even a second, that perhaps I might actually know what I'm doing? That I provoked a violent response from Leng in order to demonstrate his weakness and my overall superiority?" Shepard shook her head and looked away. Garrus could tell it was an attempt to get her emotions under control. Alenko was the only one that could breach the Commander's professional exterior. Of course, he was also the only one that ever dared to confront the Commander so directly and openly. They just usually didn't do it in the middle of the damned control center. Garrus knew this was bad, very bad.

"I better get down there," the turian mumbled as he back away.

"Wait, Garrus," Shepard said, her eyes shooting to him as he caught her attention. She mostly managed to keep her tone civil. "I also promised Leng some reading material. I'll take you up and get you a couple of my books to start with. You can take them with you when you go over."

"Oh, well that's just great," Kaidan said with his most sarcastic snarl. "Did you offer our guest the use of the lounge as well? He can help himself to the bar and I'll fetch him a nice cigar, too, and maybe a couple of virgins to help make his stay more comfortable!"

"Now, you're just being childish," Shepard growled and walked past the irate major and headed for the lift. "Come on, Vakarian, I don't want to leave Richeson alone with Leng too long. He might not be able to handle one unarmed, neurologically dampened prisoner who's locked in a cell all on his own. He is only an Ensign, after all," she all but sneered as she walked into the lift.

Unable to deny Shepard's order to follow, despite his natural instincts to put as much space between himself and the emotionally compromised, combative, and deadly human female as possible, Vakarian followed her onto the lift.

Alenko turned and watched them walk away. Before the doors shut he offered one last parting shot.

"You're not infallible, you know. If you get over-confident, people are going to end up dead. Just try and remember that, will you?"

Then the doors were closed between them.

* * *

It took Shepard over an hour to calm down after the scene in the CIC with Kaidan. She'd managed not to snap at Garrus, while they went to her quarters and fetched a couple of her books for him to deliver to Leng. She'd even managed to only scowl at him when he very carefully commented that maybe she should take a break and try and de-stress.

"A very wise person once told me that it helps to have some way to take out your frustration, off the field. It's good advice, you know. Especially if you're having relationship trouble, or trouble with a fellow officer…" Garrus sounded uncomfortable, but managed to attempt to be consoling, anyway. "Don't let the Major get to you. He's just upset because he cares and he doesn't want to see you get hurt."

"I'm aware of the Major's motivations, Garrus. That doesn't make him any less of a pain in my ass, however.

"Right," Garrus replied with a nervous laugh as he stepped back onto the lift, a small stack of hardback books in his arms. "I'm just saying, hang in there. I have faith in you, even if some other people can't seem to see you've got this all under control. "

"Right, well, thanks, Garrus, I'll keep that in mind."

She had considered offering him a conciliatory smile, but, in the end, decided she just didn't have the energy to make it believable.

"Let me know if Leng does anything interesting, okay?"

"You got it," Garrus nodded.

Then the lift was closing and he was gone.

Shepard worked out the new roster for Leng guard duty, took a call from Urdnot Bakara who expressed deep concerns about Wreve and his "Leadership Style", sent a message to Kasumi Goto concerning some inquiries about advanced infiltration hardware, sent Hackett an updated report on her progress with Leng and her plans for recovering Omega station from Cerberus control, read a rather lengthy report from Liara about the development by the crucible scientists on a mass indoctrination cure, and did some research into Dr. Garret Bryson and his research on the reaper technology recovered from Sovereign's remains after the battle of the citadel.

Over all she had to consider it a rather successful day. She had made definite progress with Leng, made significant advancement with her plans for the Omega operation, and managed to keep from killing any members of the crew that had interrupted her during the course of the day. That included Dr. Chakwas, who had come knocking on her door around lunch time with a plate of food and demanded that she not only stop to eat, but that she allow the doctor to perform a rather lengthy and invasive check up on her physical status and the, apparently reported, new injuries she'd sustained during her visit with Kai.

She'd insisted that she'd barely felt them when she'd received them and they were minor enough that she'd quickly forgotten about them as soon as she'd returned to her cabin.

Chakwas had grudgingly admitted that the swelling was almost completely gone from her face and the bruises on her neck were only superficial and would be gone in a day or two.

So there she sat, her injuries on the mend, her plans in motion, and her to do list getting shorter, and still she couldn't help but remember Kaidan's words, and picture his face, which immediately led to her wanting to put her fist through something solid, preferably the Major's face.

"Does he think I like negotiating with that bastard?" she muttered under her breath as she logged out of her personal terminal and straightened the rather impressive stack of data pads on her desk. Her mind was a busy swirl of mental lists, personal notes, and violently conflicting emotions.

Her stomach was empty, however, and raised its voice in protest of its neglect.

Raina rubbed her face with both hands and pushed her chair away from her desk. As she stood she rolled her shoulders and popped her neck. She was in desperate need of a work out, and possibly another spar with Vega. Her little tussle with Kai Leng, earlier had barely been enough to get her blood pumping and her adrenaline flowing. Ironically, her argument with Kaidan had been a better cardio workout.

Her stomach growled again, and she resisted the urge to tell it to go to hell. After all, it had only been…

She looked at the clock and realized it was close to 8 hours since she'd been forced to stop for lunch. It was getting late and she still hadn't taken time for Leng's gym time.

She spitefully procrastinated on his behalf, changing her clothes slowly before making her way down to the mess.

She found James in the galley working at the something in a sizzling skillet. It smelled excruciatingly delicious. He stirred a colorful mix of yellow, red, and green, and as she leaned over his shoulder to get a look, (and a smell), she couldn't help but smile.

"I don't know where you managed to stash such exotic food stuffs, Lieutenant, but as your commanding officer, I sure hope you plan on sharing… whatever that is." She leaned against his should as she took one last sniff of the spicy aromas rising from the pan.

"'Morning, Lola," Vega smiled back. "You wouldn't be talking about my rancheros scramble, here, would you? 'Cause I'm not sure I made enough for two…"

"Oh, really? Looks like there's enough to me," She glanced between the skillet and Vega's grinning a face. "Course, I do tend to forget you can eat enough for a whole squad."

"Guess that means it's a good thing I can cook for a whole squad, eh, Commander?" Vega said with a wink as he pulled two plates from the cupboard and began dishing up the finished food.

"True, you are full of all kinds of hidden talents," she said with a sly smile as she got out two sets of utensils.

"Right," he chuckled, "I'm a quadruple threat. I'm tall, dark, too sexy for my own good, and I can cook food that will leave your taste buds quivering with quenched pleasure."

Raina found herself repressing a deep shiver. Vega was reaching around her to pull a mug off the rack and his words tickled over her neck as they made their way to her ears. His breath on her skin made his voice seem much more intimate then they were intended. She stepped out of his reach as soon as she could without her movements coming across as a hasty retreat, and carried their plates to the table.

"Coffee?" Vega asked as he poured himself a cup.

"With dinner? No thanks, just water for me, or I'll be up all night."

Vega shrugged and pulled a bottle of water from the refrigeration unit. "My schedule's all out of whack since you have me on the night shift watching Señor Cerberus. One man's dinner is another man's breakfast. Or woman's," James added with another wink as he sat down next to her, placing their drinks above their plates.

"Thank you," she nodded as she picked up her fork and took her first bite. No surprise, the food tasted even better than it smelled. "Wow, those almost taste like real chicken eggs."

Vega scoffed playfully. "Please, Shepard, I may be a master of the culinary arts, but no one is that good."

Per the unspoken rule of all space traveling military personnel, Shepard did not ask what kind of eggs they were eating. It was almost a guarantee that she would be better off if she didn't know.

"Well," she said after she'd finished chewing a few more bites, "if you keep this up I'm going to pull you off the night shift and put you on permanent galley duty. You can be my executive chef."

Vega nearly choked on his mouthful of egg, tomato, and green pepper. "Yeah, sure, that would keep me busy for about 3 hours a day."

Shepard smiled as she continued eating. "I'm sure we could come up with some other tasks for you to do. You'd be like an all-purpose assistant. You could answer e-mails, clean my armor, mod my weapons, and whatever other petty personal chores I could think of." She bumped his shoulder as she said this and gave him a sidelong smirk. "I'm sure I could come up with something to keep your hands full."

She felt Vega freeze next to her and she turned her head to look at him curiously. He was giving her an odd look, made even odder by the fact that his fork was stalled half-way to his mouth. When her eyes met his, his face lifted into a cocky grin.

"Geez, Lola, you trying to make me blush again?"

Raina replayed her words in her head, catching on just a second too late just how she might have sounded. "Christ, Vega," she said with an exasperated shake of her head, "I didn't mean it that way."

Despite her best efforts, it was her face that flooded with incriminating color.

James threw back his head and laughed then, a full-bodied, rich baritone that jolted through Shepard like lightning. She wasn't touching him now, but he was sitting close enough that she could feel the radiant heat from his arm lying on the table next to hers.

She tried to laugh it off and reached for her water, taking a long, deep swig of the cool liquid and willing her face back to its normal color. "That's it," she said with a smile as she wiped her mouth on the back of her wrist. "You're fired. It's back to night shift guard duty for you."

"Damn," Vega cursed impishly, "Lost my chance at a cushy job working under the Commander."

Shepard nearly choked on her half-chewed mouthful of egg.

Vega helpfully pounded her on the back as she coughed and tried to get her food and air going back down their designated tubes. When she felt things were properly back in their right order she cleared her throat and shifted a little farther from Vega.

"Anyway," she managed to get out eventually, "you got my message about doubling the guard on Leng, right?"

"I did," Vega nodded, sipping his coffee and doing his best to ignore her indiscretion. "I gotta say that's a pretty ballsy move, letting that hombre run around unfettered, but I know better by now to expect anything less from you, Shepard. As long as you're sure it's necessary then we'll make sure he behaves."

Shepard nodded. "Good to hear. You'll be with Javik tonight. I've decided to keep my heavy hitters on him, since the risk is now higher, and starting tomorrow we'll be going to 8 hour shifts instead of 12. That'll mean pulling Cortez and Tali off of what they're doing to take a shift, but I want to make sure you all stay sharp."

Vega nodded again as he finished his food and downed the rest of his coffee. "Sounds good, Lola."

"One last thing, Vega," Shepard said as James stood and carried his dishes to the galley. "Our guest is also requesting some rec time, so I told him he could have a couple hours in the cargo bay. You're equipment is all in working order, yes?"

"Of course, but are you sure that pendejo has to use my stuff? Isn't there any equipment on that Cerberus station?" Vega sounded like a petulant child, but Shepard could tell he was mostly just having a laugh.

"Don't be selfish, Lieutenant. Technically it's the Alliance's equipment, anyway." She mock scolded him as she swept up her own dishes and carried them to the galley. "Besides, I think it's best if I help supervise these little excursions, and I like using your equipment best."

"You always say the nicest things, Lola," Vega said with another wink and a chuckle and Raina had to work very hard to hide the fact that her insides had suddenly decided to go molten.

She was shaking her head and trying not to smile as she finished taking care of her utensils. "Get your mind out of the gutter, Lieutenant. This _is_ serious, you know."

"Right, yeah, no, of course," James laughed as he put his hands up defensively, "I know that." He cleared his throat and snapped to attention. "Sir, yes, sir."

His salute was crisp and formal. Shepard was annoyed to find her focus drawn to the way his t-shirt pulled tight across his chest and stomach. The last thing she needed right now was that kind of distraction. She pulled her eyes from his rippling physique and rolled them dramatically as she returned his salute.

"All right, get to work. I'll expect the prisoner in the cargo bay in an hour, Lieutenant." She needed some time to inspect things and make sure the bay was secure and offered Leng no handy weapons or opportunities to cause trouble. "Dismissed," she spoke crisply and Vega responded in kind by turning on his heel and marching past her.

It galled her, but she couldn't help but sneak one peak at the man's incredibly tight ass as he passed. She figured she was already wound up anyway, which was the other reason she needed an hour before facing Leng. She couldn't afford to be distracted with him around and she needed to splash some cold water on her face, at the very least, and get her thoughts under control. She wouldn't let Kaidan be right if it was the last thing she did.

* * *

Leng had started to think Shepard was going to go back on her word when, first dinner, and then guard change came without a word about him getting out of his cell. He was beginning to wonder just what he was going to do if Shepard went back on her word when his cell door opened with a whoosh of compressed air. He watched patiently as the hulking marine with the mohawk walked in.

"Time to go," the Lieutenant said tilting his head towards doorway in a deceptively casual way.

Leng stood and walked past the man and into the hallway where he stood face to face with the ugliest creature Leng had ever seen, and he'd seen some ugly bastards.

His years of pressure under fire and undercover work in the field made it easy to repress his shock and revulsion as they pulsed through him in turn. He quietly eyed the alien and swiftly came to the conclusion that this was the prothean that had been discovered on Eden Prime shortly after the Reaper invasion of Earth.

Leng knew the Illusive Man had made a paltry effort to recover the prothean, but that had been one of the many times that Shepard and her crew had bested Cerberus troops and beaten them to the prize. As a subject for study and research, the prothean would have been an excellent sample worth obtaining. Seeing it walking around the ship, working with Shepard as one of its crew, however, was enough make his skin crawl.

"Rest assured, human, I find you just as repulsive to my senses," the strange, "Though your skills in battle are commendable, I find your submission to the Reaper indoctrination indicates an inferior will. I will enjoy killing you if you give me provocation."

Leng narrowed his eyes at the strange alien, who's voice buzzed unpleasantly again his ears, but refused to respond. If this ghost of a long extinct race thought that would be enough to get him rattled, then he took pleasure in proving him wrong. They would see who had the inferior will.

"All right, kids, you'll have to have your pissing contest later, the Commander is waiting," Vega said as he pushed past them and led the way down the hall. Leng followed, trying to ignore the sensation of all 4 of the thing's eyes on his back. Instead, he focused on memorizing the path back to the Normandy. He had been working on re-creating a mental map of the Lazarus station in his head, and now he was striving to incorporate his new impressions into what existed in his memory. He was pretty sure he knew which part of the station they were holding him in.

Once they were aboard the Normandy, he was marched through the CIC and into the lift without incident. He noticed 3 chances to grab a weapon, but had decided to wait on his escape plans until he could assure his escape. Plus, he was curious to see what Shepard had planned.

When the lift doors opened into the cargo bay, he was greeted by a scowling Shepard holding a set of black clothes that she quickly offered to him.

"You can change behind that stack of crates," she said without preamble. "Make it snappy. You're two hours starts now." As Leng gripped the clothes, a light weight white tank top and a pair of dark blue athletic pants, he saw Shepard nod to his human guard.

"Keep an eye on him, Vega," Shepard said as she walked over to the open space to do some stretches.

Leng wasted no time. He walked around a stack of large crates to find a small secluded alcove where he quickly stripped and then put on the new clothes. He quickly folded the clothes he'd removed and placed them on another crate that sat strategically behind a weapon modification bench. Unsurprisingly, all the tools from the bench were carefully hidden from sight.

Leng was somewhat surprised by the sight of Shepard, dressed down in her own version of workout clothes, bent over stretching her hamstrings and calves. He made a deliberate effort not to stare at her ass, since he had just started to feel normal again, and he wondered how much focus it would take for him to ignore her all together.

Well, he'd been looking for a way to show off his decidedly not inferior will. He should know by now to be careful what he wished for.

He made no comment, but moved into the center of the large open room, alongside a shuttle and started his own warm-up routine.

Things were going pretty well, all things considered, for the first hour. Shepard and Leng warmed up in silence, him in the middle of the room, her between him and door. Leng was thrilled to find that, somehow, the draining effect had been turned off and he was able to push his body to the full extent of its limit. He ran through his normal routine of push-ups and sit-ups, working his core with some basic free-style exercises before moving on to the weights.

Shepard moved closer to him then to use the pull up bar. He tried not to notice her, but seeing as how she was basically right in front of him, her body straining and flexing as she worked her chin up over the bar over and over again. Her body was taut and her arm muscles bunched and swelled under her glistening skin.

Kai clenched his jaw and forced his eyes back to the weights in front of him. He focused his entire being on doing curls, bringing the dumbbell up and back down and up again. He could do this. He could block her out. He was in control. He was…

Shepard dropped back to the ground with a grunt and gripped her arms behind her back to stretch her shoulders. The sound of her grunt made him look, the line of her sports bra under her tank top made him stare a little too long.

"HEY!" The large marine with the massive pecs and dominating deltoids and the crushing biceps shouted from where he stood a dozen feet to Leng's left. The hulking brute had been leaning against the shuttle, but now he was upright and glaring daggers at Kai.

"Eyes to yourself, mirón."

Leng gave Vega a dirty look from the side of his eye and then went back to his reps.

Shepard released her grip and glanced between Leng and Vega as she massaged one shoulder. Finally, she settled her frown on James, her expression equal parts confusion, consideration and disappointment. She turned away after a moment's contemplation and grabbed the tape off of Vega's table to begin wrapping her knuckles.

Leng watched all of this from his peripheral vision as he finished his right arm and passed the weights to his left hand.

Shepard, in the meanwhile, stepped up to the large bag and began a slow dance, using focused, deliberate hits to start with. From the scowl she was giving the bag, though, it was pretty obvious she would rather be fighting a real opponent.

Leng glanced back at his human guard and then at Shepard. It was all too possible he was the one she usually sparred with. Given her augmentation, it only made sense that she would need such a strong opponent to feel any challenge at all.

He grinned as the now familiar tingle trickled through the fibers of his arm muscles, and the weights seemed to grow lighter in his hands. He still wasn't as strong as he was with his own armor on, but he was feeling much better.

The memory of their tussle earlier, flashed into the forefront of Leng's brain and he felt a wash of mixed emotions. Frustration, rage, lust, exhilaration, and the thrill of a worthy opponent were only the most prominent ones. It was true that, at the time, he'd been so angry that he hardly registered their fight on any but the most superficial, bestial level.

Now, however, he could analyze and evaluate their performances in a clinical, professional way. It was such a brief exchange, though. He felt that old curiosity rearing its familiar face as he wondered, for the millionth time, which of them was really the best.

Earlier, she'd had the advantage of keeping him restrained by whatever force she was using to dampen his cybernetics and drain his strength. That handicap was now gone.

Before he could think about what he was doing, Kai set the weights down on the bench and turned to shoot the Lieutenant a malicious smirk as he addressed the Commander.

"I don't suppose you'd be interested in rematch, now that things are more even between us?"

Shepard paused in her hits against the bag and turned slowly to face Leng.

"It would be more of challenge that knocking around that beat up piece of shit," he said with a disdainful sneer, "and I promise to keep it a fair fight…" his voice trailed off and he found himself chuckling rather wickedly. "Well, I say fair…" He popped his knuckles and stepped back, raising his fists and his eyebrows as if to dare her. "I promise not to kill you, how about that."

Shepard was turned and facing him square on now. She laughed defiantly at his words and tightened the tape on her hands. "As if you could…" she eyed him suspiciously, obviously weighing the risks and evaluating the threat he possessed. He thought it was pretty clear she wanted to beat on him just as badly as he did.

After what seemed like forever, the corner of her mouth curled into a cocky half-grin.

"All right, Leng, let's see what you got."

**AN: Soooooooo… What did you think?! 8000 words, right!? I wanted to get to their fight, but that will have to wait. As you know, the plans of mice and me… Well, now I will be extra motivated to get the next chapter started, because I'm super excited about writing it. I'll have it up as soon as I can. In the meantime, you know the drill. Let me what your impressions were, good or bad, I want to hear it all.**


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